[Closed] strange things you see on your commute...

I think if you say something like "fair cop, guv" then they walk you to the van, if you want a scrap they sit on you until you have been trussed up like an animal.

Was he holding his head at arms reach?

The highlight of my commute is usually meeting the pack of local hunt hounds going in the other direction. Farking big things a bit unnerving as they swarm round you heading in the other direction while I am sat on my bike.

Watch out for the massive doo doos left on the road. I really must have a word with the master and ask why the hands don't pick it up off the road...

Was he holding his head at arms reach?

they were both that drunk they were staggering about all over the place but at one point it did like he was trying to do that...

Once saw a naked middle aged lady looking out of an upstairs window using the windowsill as 'support' for her chest ... That wasn't a good commute... 🙁

Bradford

Men in lycra on silly skinny wheeled bikes 🙁 Have yet to see anything stranger than that 😆

Panicky squirrels zigzagging across the path in front of me clearly in a dilemma as to whether to drop the acorn to help them avoid the big bloke on the bike bearing down on them.

Bromptons

Large pink vibrator lying in the middle of a very rural country lane. It looked very lost.

I saw a Macaw flying over the road. They are huge when you see them in flight

On Tuesday a squirrel leapt of a 5ft bank at me, hit my front tyre, bounced of forks then onto road and ran off.

Wednesday this week - two apache helicopters circling low overhead(Im glad there on my side).
Last week- lady muck taking a dump in the corner of an onion field "can one not get privacy anywhere"?
Strangest though- last year middle of winter crossing a heath very late with that fog/mist that sits at waist hight I came across this old boy who looked like Einstein staring up at the sky. I asked if he was OK but didnt get a reply so just left before he turned in a werewolf..or something.

I disturbed a young lady squatting in a lane relieving herself (wee-wee wise) just the other day. About 16:30 in the afternoon, broad daylight.

When you gotta go....

Saw a Gocycle last night. It was odd because the chap riding it looked like he should have been in London; nice suit & shoes, very smart (I'm actually in mucky Brighouse, a grimmish little northern town 200 miles away from London!).

He also only rode it about 1/2 a mile if that, and would have been quicker walking. If that's his regular commute, he's definitely wasted the best part of £3K on it. And he rode like he'd no idea how to ride a bike!

Also went past a shop with an interesting name over the door, imagine my disappointment when I found out it was a kitchen shop

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I once saw a car driver use their indicators correctly.

Nah, must've been a dream.

A photo shoot and luckily was for lady bikinis. Unluckily for the ladies it was blooming freezing.

A fast food delivery guy in car down a nice little singletrack. Was very lost and pretty much got his car stuck. Impressed he got so far down the path.

A lady and gent doing things to each other they shouldn't in public.

A very old lady taking a pee whilst trying to hold onto her dog's lead. I tried my best not to disturb either of them but it didn't work and it didn't end well as the dog bolted for me and pulled her over.

We've got a load of Parrots in Greenwich Park now, so them..

Nothing that can compete her. The odd semi-naked person in the window, a few drunks but nothing overly exciting.

A partially decomposed body in the river.

A 'bubbly' lady draped over a convertable BMW. Not a pretty sight.

I tried a different route to work and rode past a man with his hand down his ladyfriend's trousers. I said 'nice morning for it' and carried on past.

What I didn't realise was that my new route was actually a dead end and I had to turn round and ride back past them. When I got back to them she was launching into a massive "I told you so" tirade and he was looking very sheepish.

Canal towpath through rough area of Glasgow, winter.

Surface of canal frozen but thin in the middle.

Drunk guy among reeds at edge holding large branch out to companion near the middle of the canal.

Companion has one hand on other end of branch, other hand holding smaller branch of his own.

End of smaller branch on fire.

Inches beyond flaming end of smaller branch is partially burnt corpse of quite large dog, half submerged through broken ice.

Still can't figure it out.

LOL!!!!!!!!

This is more something I [i]didn't[/i] see, but on Tuesday evening I cycled down the cyclepath on the top pictue no more than two minutes before flames were spotted and the fire brigade was called (I checked my Garmin log to confirm the timing...)

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-leeds-29442712

😯

I saw quite a few bats on my Thursday morning commute, probably after the insects attracted by my bike lights.

A couple of Zebras grazing happily as can be, along with a Gazelle type creature.
Not what you expect to see along the Walsall Road. (They were with the Circus.)

Random shoes - often!

A couple taking a walk hand in hand every morning at 5.25am.
The bloke who pushes his bike up the same hill every day at 5.35am.
Once met a French man who had fallen asleep on a night bus ,expecting to be in Trafalgar sq.
He was in High Barnet.

People on the worst imaginable BSO with a high vis on, no helmet, a rucksack, upside down handlebars, back to front forks, vertical brakes and two flat tyres.

Dangerous.

I need to move somewhere more exciting. All I see is other miserable looking people on their way to work. My commute only becomes momentarily thrilling when I get to scalp a roadie or avoid death by automobile

I've kind of been on the other end of this. Out very early in the morning when deli belly comes calling I pushed on but it had to be.
In the middle of nowhere on a bridleway I ducked behind a bush to be ill. Out of the blue 3 men in nice suits and shoes walk strait past me I have no idea where they came from or there destination. 3+ miles of nowt apart from the odd farm around. They never even looked at me heads down walking in dirt and cow poo.

At 6am one old winter morning two ladyboys holding hands wobbling drunk along the path beside the Rhine in Cologne... Then five minutes later a Mexican with full size Sombrero and Cape, cowboy boots and huge moustache... It was the day after carnival.

I saw a guy walking on the top of the railings above the Itchen river from the train yesterday. All casual with headphones in and a 6ft+ drop to the river.

If you travel between the Northam train care depot and bitterne its the bit with the board walk.

I've kind of been on the other end of this.

Likewise, but involved a girl rather than dysentery. Same MX biker rode past us half a dozen times.

Rode past a 911 in slow moving traffic yesterday, woman driving wasn't looking at the road - as i got alongside i saw she was reading a book to the child in the car seat. Nice.

At least she was reading to her child, you've got to give her that.

If you travel between the Northam train care depot and bitterne its the bit with the board walk.

i cycle that most days; I often see weird stuff there!

this week i saw a FAT lorry driver having a wash out of a ice cream tub - he looked at me like i was in his bathroom!!

strange things you see on your commute...

People with phenomenally bright lights on the front of their bicycles in broad daylight, more often than not set to flash. That and the occasional UFO, which I put down to damaged retina.

I ride along a popular dogging path.

I've had a guy in a car flashing his lights at me.
Seen naked, errm middle aged women running around. Two men in a car, you know, having fun.

There's always loads of middle aged fat bloke milling around. One night I found three blokes looking very happy with themselves walking down the path with A WOMAN! She looked absolutely bladdered but still quite chirpy.

People with phenomenally bright lights on the front of their bicycles in broad daylight, more often than not set to flash.

I think this is a good idea. As a cyclist it might look a bit shit, as someone in a car, on a motorcycle or as a pedestrian it make sense.

The next time you're not on a bike but see a cyclist take a look at the clothing they're wearing and how they blend into the background. Doing something to make yourself stand out is a pretty good survival tactic.

People with phenomenally bright lights on the front of their bicycles in broad daylight, more often than not set to flash. That and the occasional UFO, which I put down to damaged retina.

Cycled past a bloke who was walking from his car to his house normally attired apart from no trousers.
'Good morning' I say.
'I was caught there' he says.
'Her husband will be along in a minute,' says I.
We both laughed as I cycled off.

Not on my commute but riding from Skiddaw House to Mosedale there was 2 portly half naked blokes in the last sheep pen. My mate said that there was a third guy on his hands and knees.

I'm sure they had a perfectly good explanation.