[Closed] Pretty Lady Seduction Techniques....

have you tried talking to her?

slip the finger and see how it pans out?

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If you have a moustache, slicken it.

If you have hair, tidy it up.

If you love MTB more than life itself, don't tell her.

Oh, and be nice and interested.

Failing that, be yourself. 😉

Good luck to you - I hope she's worth it!

Sounds like time for the elephant impression and then take it from there 😈

Spend some time getting to know her, this is best achieved by hiding in the bushes outside her home with a pair of binoculars, and borrowing delicate items from her washing line.

have you tried talking to her?

Whoa there, lets start with the simple stuff before moving on to the more advanced techniques.

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He's a romantic, is binners. 😉

ummmm stop posting to STW ......

This is me really Camo.....

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Helllooooooooooo laydeeeeeeeeeez 😀

We need pictures of this fair maiden before we can comment correctly!

I want to plough you.....

HTH

All you need to know:

Binners, if I wasn't taken I'd make a play for you myself...

[url=

followed these steps...[/url]

It's not worked so far... keep the suggestions coming

Tell her you like riding bikes and that you'd like to add another to the fleet if she's interested...

More seriously, if you're good at cooking then cook for her. find something you're both interested in and do it. or arrange a sunset walk on the beach (if she's interested she will get the hint!)

but im still not 100% sure shes into it

If over 50% gof for it, the odds are in your favour.

Ah what the hell, even if less than 50% for it, have to take these chances when they present themselves 😉

Last time i commented on such matter I receieved a two day ban (Sorry Mods)

so All I can say is just lean across near her and if she pulls away its game over.

Sex Panther.

Just ask here a simple question:

"Do you like fruit?"

ask if she's got a sister
or a photo of her mum

Ask her to pull your finger.

She needs to see the goods. It's only right that you oblige.....

Q: Would you like sex?

A: Not particularly

Q: Would you mind lying down while I have some then?

If I may slip back into serious mode then if you're having a great laugh together and if she drops everything to come out and have beers with you then she's interested.

Just be nice, gentlemanly and see what happens.

Relax, enjoy the company and you'll soon find out what happens next.

Just make sure your PH levels are high and your place is tidy with no obvious signs of deviancy, excess or instability.

So when is this hot date? When are you updating the status of the event?

The alarming thing about ladies I've found, is that they're often different to each other. So while some of them like cats and you can lie and pretend you like cats to those ones, obviously lying to ones who don't like cats will make you less desirable.

In the long run, if you lie that you like cats, and end up living with said lady, you'll probably end up sharing the house with some of the fetid, self-centred evil ones which will just end in tears.

So it's probably best to just be yourself, be relaxed and don't try to be anything you're not. Try not to think about nailing her too. That can lead to a funny look in your eye and will often encourage you to take some risks that wouldn't normally fall into your nature. Imagine you're taking bob from engineering out because you like him and nothing more.

[i]Just be nice, gentlemanly and see what happens. [/i]

Where's the fun in that?

"Do you have a mirror on your stomach, 'cos I can see myself in your knickers"

Try not to think about nailing her too. That can lead to a funny look in your eye and will often encourage you to take some risks that wouldn't normally fall into your nature. Imagine you're taking bob from engineering out because you like him and nothing more.

What if I can't stop thinking about nailing Bob in engineering?

Last time I commented on one these, I got a 2 day ban as well!!

Just to pick up on Samuri's point, all women who own cats are as crazy as a bag of weasels. Never ever date a women who owns cats!

This is where doing your research in the bushes outside her home could really pay dividends in heading off such disasters.

You could always ask WELLWELLWELL, it did take him some toime to get around to it though.

Second thoughts not a great idea you will still be here next Christmas and when you do get around to it the answer would be no.

Q: Can I smell your *********?

A: No!

Q: Ah, then it must be your feet!

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Come on emsz, you can't wimp out. If a chap's after a pretty lady, who better to give pretty lady getting advice than a pretty lady who's experienced at getting pretty ladies?

Then again, you might be a munter... 😉

Shower first.

Around where I live I tend to batter her boyfriend first then tell her and her mates that I've headbutted Police before as well as being in Strangeaways. All you need is to buy said lady flowers once and she describes you as a gentleman to all her friends.

(I've actually HEARD all the above as well as chatting casually to a ex-bouncer who'd just been released the day before from Strangeways for headbutting a Policeman who came to arrest him at home)..

Our Gym is [i]interesting[/i]

Our Gym is interesting

You go to the gym??

"Do you have a mirror on your stomach, 'cos I can see myself in your knickers"

I thought this was comedy gold, then I worried that she might think I want to wear her knickers. Which I then thought about and realised its not so bad

Then again, you might be a munter...

alexxx - Member

Anyone got any magic tips on seduction technique... foods cooked, wines being drunk, laughs being had... nice eye contact... but im still not 100% sure shes into it... do I man the **** up or try to find out more?

Just for clarity- are you posting from the table at which you're having this meal? If so, just show her this thread.

You go to the gym??

we all don't give up like you

Genius - comedy retort of the year. If going to the gym makes me look like a moon faced Freddy Mecury, I'll give it a miss ta

[i]with a taste for
[/i]

True. In fact that could be emsz and her bird.

Well, everyday's a school day. I've just learned that you don't make conversation about DIY. Who'd have guessed.

If going to the gym makes me look like a moon faced Freddy Mecury

Better than looking like a long-faced Chimp then? 😆 😉

Better than having a face like a long-faced Chimp then?

I've been called a lot of things but a long faced chimp is a new one. I give up, you're clearly not going to bite - you win 😆

I've had no coffee today

As Keith Lemon Says "feel the cloth of my sleeve - that's boyfriend material"!!

Good luck!!

Is the technique different for an "ugly" lady?? 😉

Pay attention, make them laugh, be yourself.

Don't put on the following, whip out a bottle of Baileys and 2 mugs;

This thread needs photos so we understand the level of flange being dealt with here

"Long faced chimp" if the comments above are anything to go by.

We need photo's +1

wrecker - Member
She needs to see the goods. It's only right that you oblige.....

Just not in your Bibs, that won't work.

Sensibly, take her out for a drink and watch for the signs - eye contact, playing with her hair, damp patch on her chair etc. If you get all of those, its time to ask to escort her home - your home.

Read "The Game" by Neil Strauss

[url= http://www.amazon.co.uk/Game-Undercover-Secret-Society-Artists/dp/184767237X ]Pick up artists book.[/url]

Is the technique different for an "ugly" lady??

* that's the foreplay

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Hang on, I'm confused, is he actually in the middle of seduction and sneaked of for advice from the mind hive that is STW?

Anyway magic tips: Just be yourself.
Don't wear any of that cheap foreign muck bottled as Eau de porc, don't eat too much garlic.
And really, really don't whisper romantically into her ear 'insert incorrect name here'.

Good luck.

Be old fashioned. Tit her up first.

(

)

Bunnyhop - Member

Anyway magic tips: Just be yourself.

Unless you're terrible, then be someone else.

You don't want to live with a woman who constantly complains about your favourite thing in life! So if you are looking for a keeper, then tell her about your bike habit straight off. If she panics, she's not the one for you.

Bunnyhop - member

And really, really don't whisper romantically into her ear 'insert incorrect name here'.

Too true. That time I called you Julian just killed the moment.

Lick her face, call her 'My little project' and order for her.

They love that.

Too true. That time I called you Julian just killed the moment.

Buzzlightyear has it. Take her into the garage and show her the collection before any rumpy pumpy. She needs to know that'll you'll be spending all of the weekends on an mtb and riding off on dark, windy, wet nights, coming back dripping wet and covered in muck from the outset

[i]Well totally understandable as we are like identical twins. MartynS has also made this mistake.[/i]

Which way round? 🙂

Serenade her

IHN - Member

Well totally understandable as we are like identical twins. MartynS has also made this mistake.

Which way round?

Whisper in her ear: "It puts the lotion in the basket, or it gets the hose again"

Works every time.

ask her 1st if she likes rimming if not **** her off. 😉

Misread the title as "Pretty Lady Suction Techniques"...

😆

I'm a bit shy so I just showed her this video Kudos... we'll see if she replies

Good man.

It's too late now but your perfect line earlier today would have been "the world is ending soon and I dont want to die a virgin.

don't act too keen, if she's interested then make her work for it as well. If she's not that bothered she might not be worth busting a nut over.

You need to be on the Pick Up Artist forum, http://www.pick-up-artist-forum.com/, also read the book 'The Game'

dripping wet and covered in muck

"if you're lucky i'll introduce you to me dungeon wife"

always makes their undergardens go frothy