[Closed] No kids & Having the snip

I'm 100% with Houns on this, 38 & I've known since 17 that I don't want kids - I have absolutely no paternal instinct/desire.

There's a lot of people who want & have kids who possibly shouldn't but people who don't want them definitely shouldn't.

Never needed permission from my ex at the time
GP "Why?"
Me "2 kids, dont want anymore and I;m sick of the mood swings of her on the pill"
GP "Good call 😉 "

Hmm. Given the amount of people wanting to get the snip....I'm thinking, group buy?

Never bought into the whole you must get married and have kids lark!

Yeah the human race would be really successful if everyone just gave up on the idea of having kids 😉

I know it's just a personal choice, I'm in my 20's and off to the docs next week to try and get it arranged I do have (what seems like) 30000000000 kids though

Want the room in my freezer for chicken dippers

It's a good question, and a tough one at that...
Your GP won't require the 'input' from the opposite partner in any situation, but of course will be raised in the consultation.
It's not 'usual' for a nullip male (no kids) not in a long term relationship to ask for it, but it's not beyond the scope of reasonable request...
You'll try to be convinced out of it, but ultimately if you want it, then you'll be allowed to go for it.

RE:

It'll not be an issue they'll ask you are you sure they do anyway, because they should after all it's a procedure and they do get people coming back for a reversal, then they'll let you choose and book a date.

Interestingly, the implant (for laydeez) is more effective than the snip...

DrP

You are in your 20's and you know you don't want kids...so surprised by this statement...

The only thing I was certain of in my 20's is I liked bikes, beer and shagging.

If I look back to my 20's and now, 39, I'm so different I wonder whether I should change my name!

I............actually "we" popped 3 of the little blighters out from 34 to 36 (twins involved)....

They drive me crazy sometimes, but you watch how they pick things up and remind you how bloody great it was to be a kid and you wouldn't change anything.

Seriously....putting on a rain hat is that difficult?

Interestingly, the implant (for laydeez) is more effective than the snip...

That's made me hyperventilate.

I didn't want kids at 36 either.

I do at 40.

Don't think I want kids right now (same age) but if Mrs 10 gets rich I may need an anchor baby.

[i]You are in your 20's and you know you don't want kids...so surprised by this statement...[/i]

Yet earlier, Houns says he's 36.
I wish people would stop being so surprised that some people don't want kids.

Guy I know had the snips after kid number 2. Number 3 due next month! So be aware, it's not 100%!

Yet earlier, Houns says he's 36.
I wish people would stop being so surprised that some people don't want kids

I was actually replying to someone else's post.

36 really isn't that long in the tooth. I would consider having a tattoo quite permanent even though laser treatment is quite good now days (so I hear)....unless there is some reversal treatment out there...having the snip is a pretty big decision.

If we are all to believe that we will live into out 80's and 90's perhaps further, we still have a long way in front of us even at 36.....hopefully.

I think 2orangey4crows has it. I was skiing with a 70 year old at the weekend, his daughter is 15, they get on great. I'm quite happy using condoms as needed but know some aren't.

The NHS won't reverse any vasectomies.

They used to, because I've gassed for reversals before, and I've never worked outside the Nash.

However, even the urologist doing the operating was pessimistic about the chances of a reversal being successful.

Kids are awesome. Having the snip is not. IMHO of course.

If you or anyone feel the polar opposite then so be it.

Both me and the wife didn't want kids. I got the snip at about 40. I've not regretted it once (I'm now 54).
Go for it, if it's what you want.

[i]Kids are awesome[/i]

No they aren't. (IMO) Even my (step)granddaughter gives me the heebie jeebies. Rather have a pet rat. & I've shot lots of rats.

I hate kids me, but I think I've said that before.

Go for it if you are sure.

A mate had 3 kids, divorced, remarried, snip reversal, 3 more kids, then another snip. I think he just has a weird fetish.

I hate kids me, but I think I've said that before.

You'd love mine* 😉

*this is what every dog owner tells me when they decide to cure me of my dislike of dogs.

Do it. I wish I did but it's too late for me. When you know, you know.

I'll have it done in the next year or so. I'm 30.

My wife and I have a 2 year old and another's brewing at the moment (due in October). We're both 100% sure that 2's our magic number! Don't want "a wee late one"

I'm loving all these people in their twenties and thirties saying that they're sure they don't want children. That may be true, but there is a very high chance that view will change in the next 10 years.

I have never wanted any kids, always found them foul, annoying, irritating. Had much better things to do with my life and didn't see any need to compromise any of that. Most of my friends were the same. Some much more so, to the extent that they nearly got the snip years ago.

At this point all of us bar two pairs have kids and love it. One of the ones that doesn't wishes they had tried much earlier.

To the 40+ year olds saying they don't want kids and never will... I can respect that decision and credit to you for making it and sticking to it. To the younger ones, just wait a bit.

There are people who don't want kids, and there are old people. I know very very few people in both those groups. Very few.

I've never wanted kids, right from the age of 18 when I'd made my mind up, I'm a few years older and still just as wise but never chosen to have the snip, I just can't be bothered with surgery.
There is no " what if one day? " rattling in my head, end of.

If the snips the way you want to manage this, then do it.

That may be true, but there is a very high chance that view will change in the next 10 years.

Why "very high"? What is that based on? If it's just the experience of you and your friends then it's pretty arrogant (and kind of insulting to be honest) to assume that everyone elses experience will mirror that of you and your friends.

For those of you who are of the mindset of "I can't believe you want to do this", imagine if someone tells me they want a child or a planning to have one, I have the exact "I can't believe you want to do this" thought

So what if your partner or future partner wants kids? The desire can suddenly kick in you know.

It can (and does) split couples up when one partner wants children and the other partner can produce the sperm (or eggs).

My partners desire to have kids was zip, negative, narda until she hit 80 then it was I WANT KIDS. She'd have been knocked up/probably with someone else by now if I had refused (well being cynical).

TBH I never wanted kids either. I'm kinda glad hora junior came along though. I still cant stand other peoples kids (and dont want another).

And 😆 @ Jaffa Cake!

If a partner wants kids then she's not right for me/I'm not right for her. We would have to split as if we stayed together and either chose to have them or not then one of us would be miserable for the rest of our lives

If a partner wants kids then she's not right for me/I'm not right for her. We would have to split as if we stayed together and either chose to have them or not then one of us would be miserable for the rest of our lives

You're on to a loser on here, people do find it exceptionally hard to believe that some people really just don't want kids.

You'll get the "you'll love it the second you see it" line next.

Yeah I'm surprised that one hasn't come out yet!

What if you fall for someone and one year in she does/you do?

BANG 'I wish I could turn back the clock'.

Just leave it as is- you've gone 36yrs without an accident.

gonefishin - Member
Why "very high"? What is that based on? If it's just the experience of you and your friends then it's pretty arrogant (and kind of insulting to be honest) to assume that everyone elses experience will mirror that of you and your friends.

Yes, I can see where you're coming from. It's also pretty naive (sp) and a little arrogant for people on the other hand to think they're special in not wanting kids. I'm not saying everyone else will be the same; I'm saying the vast majority will be.

Then in the very extreme chance of that ever happening (more chance of winning a euro million multi rollover jackpot without actually buying a ticket) then I'd want to adopt.

The world is far too over populated without adding to it

So, as a few still can't comprehend it, going to state it once again

I DO NOT, NOR WILL I EVER WANT CHILDREN

I DO NOT, NOR WILL I EVER WANT CHILDREN

I said the samething dude. I said the samething.

I had a really bad childhood which kinda really put me against the idea.

I don't want to be selfish etc but I'd never ever want to adopt someone elses genes/DNA.

and a little arrogant for people on the other hand to think they're special in not wanting kids.

I'm not aware of anyone who thinks this or has expressed and opinion anything like this.

We didn't want kids, together over 20 years, then she hit 40.
OMFG that timebomb went off big style, I couldn't escape!!
Now got 6 month old twins at 44........

'fishin.
Sorry what I meant to say was it was naive of people to think that they alone didn't want kids [b][u]and would continue to do so. [/u][/b]There's stacks of people who went through the same thought process of "I DON'T WANT KIDS AND NEVER WILL" and then a few years later changed their minds and had them. Some people will stick with the opinion, and all credit to them, but they are in the minority.

Just to be clear, I couldn't think of many things worse than hav

Oh it doesn't matter, come back in 15 years time and lets have the conversation then.

hora - Member

My partners desire to have kids was zip, negative, narda [b]until she hit 80[/b] then it was I WANT KIDS.

😯

If you think you're not cut out for it, or even worse would make a shit job of it, then you and any unsuspecting progeny would be far better off without the risk of it happening. Hope it all goes smoothly.

Oh it doesn't matter, come back in 15 years time and lets have the conversation then.

Is really the best you can come up with? Quite why you think having this conversation when I'm 55 is in any way relevant is beyond me.

I can understand not wanting kids.

But grandkids are the best thing ever.

Or is it EVVA?

As mentioned earlier I had similar experiences with mates going through my 20's/30's and now 40's having children and all it's done is made there lives a lot harder and more expensive and less time for other friends and family. It seems a constant monologue of " I don't have enough time/money/effort " etc. and mates groups have split because of it, then years later when their kids have grown up and moved away or are teenagers it seems mates then get back in touch and say " hey, how are you it's been a while, fancy a ride ? " my attitude is , nah bugger off, when I wanted to go riding and called on you many many times you slammed the door in my face with an exasperated look of Kid hell despair.

Your choice to have kids, don't blame anyone else for continuing with their lives if they choose not to have them.

As for partners wanting kids, and you don't, well there's only two outcomes IMO, No and if you persist then bugger off and find someone else or accept that I don't want them. MrsBouy and I went through all the normal " should we, shouldn't we " scenarios, most of it coming from her if I'm honest, I always stood my ground, no was a consistent reply. It came to a head a few years ago and I got so fed up with the constant whining I moved back home to the coast. We hadn't quite split up but it wasn't far off. Clearly now we are back together yet on occasion the topic rears it's head when in family or groups of mates etc. yet it was always her choice to be with me and mine to be with her.

This choice is no social experiment, it's not the way of the world to have kids, proving humans can still produce humans is not a human constraint nor is it an indicator that we are superior to animals in that we seem to be able to choose to either have or have no kids. I expect once we learn to speak Ant they will say similar words to us, some want kids, some don't.

Whilst I'm on, IVF is a very very blunt instrument enabler (or not) I've seen first hand two mates go through hell and financial ruin and eventual split only to meet someone else and carry on either with or without having kids ( one went on to have one kid, the other still has no kids )

Stoic comments about " but what if ? " and pinning those comments down to what ever may happen in the future are totally irrelevant in circumstances where choice not have kids is involved. We choose not to have them because we choose not to have them, end of.

I think I've made my points clear, no amount of internet arguments will change that and I feel that trying to persuade someone whose clearly chosen not to have kids and is asking about the snip, whether good or bad, is an option steers so far from the original question that maybe some people don't understand the viewpoint of the OP.

I think the OP has always been nothing less than very clear about his opinions of children. Why anybody would want to change his mind by posting on this thread is frankly ridiculous.

34, kid free, missus is 43.

She wanted them I didn't, a big deal but we got through it. Now we are happy without for a lot of reasons that I won't go into here. Short version is it's not for everyone and generally the breaders don't get it. The reasons I haven't gone for the op is I don't want unnecessary surgery and I certainly don't want it there,