Stand. Unless I’m having a poo,
Coward!
Living with ladies, I always sit to pee. They just don't need to hear all that peeing down the middle thing. The carpet thanks me and I can play Words with Friends without dropping the phone in the pan.
There's nowt as weird as (STW) folk.
longdog
Free Member
How the hell do you sit and wipe without getting your hand/wrist of forearm on the toilet seat?
Why are you fishing around for your bum hole? Mine's been in the same place for years
When your enemy awakes and finds you desecrating his shoes, better to have a standing start.
longdog
Free Member
How the hell do you sit and wipe without getting your hand/wrist of forearm on the toilet seat?Why are you fishing around for your bum hole? Mine’s been in the same place for years
Maybe my cheeks are bigger than yours?! There's only so much space between the toilet seat and yer bum to fit your hand in if sitting surely?
Another reason I stand to wipe is I need to inspect what I've just wiped, so I can see how much wiping is left. After 3 or 4 swipes the mark is fainter and then disappears so I know my work is done
I don't get how you sit down wipers can have any idea how to gauge the amount of wiping. It could be anywhere between 1 and say 6 swipes depending on the looseness of stool
But you sit downers will have no idea and this could lead to all kinds of social embarrassment and hygiene issues
****ing freaks
If you've ever stood at a urinal in a pair of cream linen trousers, you'd now sit by choice.
And shut the lid before you flush unless you like aerosolized E coli inhalation.
The carpet thanks me
Carpet in a bathroom? Jesus i can smell that from here.
Me:
SIT TO PEE at home or anywhere relatively civil/hygienic; stand otherwise.
It's a balance of hygiene thing: do I stand and mist myself in my own urine versus sit in someone else's.
SIT TO WIPE - absolutely. Why would anyone stand?? Cheeks are already parted and held at the ready by the seat. Why stand, let them smear together, and then try to wipe?
I'm also very much a reach-through-from-the-front wiper. I realise that reach-around-from-back is popular but my arse is much too large to leave enough space for that approach angle.
Back to topic, I'm increasingly sitting down to pee for the stated reasons that it offers some respite from the family and household drudgery
I can spend 5 mins on my smart phone without reproach if I'm sat on the bog
Increasingly I'm having early hours pees so have to sit down in the dark and sit there with my eyes shut so I don't wake too much and can hopefully fall back to sleep straight after, like a sloth
If the minutiae of my life interests you then please subscribe to my blog where I discuss big issues like my milk/tea ratio, my pillow angle and the layout of my bathroom cabinet
Doing it right now.
We've just had a new bathroom fitted, tiled floor instead of carpet, which had been down for maybe 15 years.
My wife made me pull the old carpet up rather than leave it to then bathroom people to do.
Having a poo or wee and looking at your smartphone and reading about other people's experiences about using their smartphones as they p...
This thread has gone meta. We've created a work of art
Doing it right now.
Me too.
At my desk.
Thanks Tena Men
Sign in the bachelor pad of a German friend
“Men, stand up for your rights, sit down for your pee” placed there by his very proper girlfriend.
Stand up.
Unless I'm offshore and it's really rough. Usually force 9 and above is a is sit down wee. But that is only because it really hurts getting hit by the toilet seat slamming down.
Did you know your body will auto stop the flow of wee if you get thrown upside down in the middle of a storm?
I’m also very much a reach-through-from-the-front wiper.
If you ever transition, you are going to have to sort that habit. Wipe away and never towards. I guess there'll be a bunch of other habits to sort out too.
I don’t get how you sit down wipers can have any idea how to gauge the amount of wiping.
I'm not sure I'm ever going to take my anal cleanliness advice from someone going by the name 'Fingerbang'.
Sorry, I thought that we all had PA’s so HAD to sit... no?
Another STW disappointment...
got told off by the GF for pissing in the bath tub when ....suffering from morning glory,
No one else pre-occupied trying to figure this one out? Is the bathtub mounted on the ceiling? Is the plug hole in the centre so that the sufferer can assume the plank position? Or do you assume a contortionist position that allows for a gentle stream to arc over the head and into the drain?
No one else pre-occupied trying to figure this one out? Is the bathtub mounted on the ceiling? Is the plug hole in the centre so that the sufferer can assume the plank position? Or do you assume a contortionist position that allows for a gentle stream to arc over the head and into the drain?
I assume he stands at one end of the bath and pees in a perfect arc, hitting the plug hole directly.
Anyone else have a bashful bladder? I need no one near me before I can go doesn’t matter how bursting I am, maybe need therapy
Yay! Me too! It’s pathetic. Can’t take a piss if in a public bathroom, at a concert etc if other people are around. I might be a freak, but people that hold conversations in a public restroom are the real monsters here. Just empty and get out you weirdos.
On the sit versus stand thing I’ll do whatever takes my fancy in the moment for peeing and after taking a shit. Keep it unpredictable. That and basically all of scienceofficers post.
Sitting absolutely to wipe, as noted it perfectly spreads the cheeks for access and anti-smear.
HOWEVER
there's something about the geometry of toilet seats that impacts on this. My one at home is just about right, as long as you sit in the right place. I have used some that are too narrow, creating a steep v-shaped valley as opposed to the U-shaped trough for optimal paper efficiency. And one at a place I used to work has such poor ergonomics that it caused such a splaying that was in danger of a self inflicted episiotomy.
Maybe that's what 2021 needs, like the arse-o-meter you get in bike shops for saddles, a similar device in Victoria Plumb for optimising bogseat fit?
I assume he stands at one end of the bath and pees in a perfect arc, hitting the plug hole directly.
Huh. I think I'd hit the ceiling or the far wall. I guess eventually it would drip down into the drain /humblebrag/
Yay! Me too! It’s pathetic. Can’t take a piss if in a public bathroom, at a concert etc if other people are around. I might be a freak, but people that hold conversations in a public restroom are the real monsters here. Just empty and get out you weirdos.
Not all that uncommon. Around 10% of men will suffer from it at some point. Treatable too.
Not all that uncommon. Around 10% of men will suffer from it at some point. Treatable too.
It’s the 60% that have a chat who need treatment 😂
At home – Sit. Standing up piddling creates a horrible mess which is both unfair and downright disgusting.
For those that stand – Cover the toilet and floor around it in toilet paper in the morning and collect it an night. It’ll all be damp and stink. Why would you want that or to trample it around your house?
Bugger that, learn to aim better! And wipe up any overspray.
Middle of the night/ first thing of a morning sitting …. don’t have to worry about aiming in the dark/gathering your thoughts for the day
And this, obvs.
I don’t get how you sit down wipers can have any idea how to gauge the amount of wiping. It could be anywhere between 1 and say 6 swipes depending on the looseness of stool
But you sit downers will have no idea and this could lead to all kinds of social embarrassment and hygiene issues
What we have here is a complete lack of imagination.
Uni mate informed me of his perceived benefit of sitting to pee... How odd I thought.. particularly when it turned out he sat facing the cistern...
Anyway, moving out of a house with carpeted bathrooms and into my own place I certainly noticed the backsplash... Have another mate who would literally peppersplash our grey tile floor after peeing.
Once we had mini humans crawling about, I absolutely converted. I sit at home to pee. In public 100% standing. At friends houses.. probably would sit. When I'm in and out of holiday rentals working or I specting then I'm sitting to prevent soiling the clean and having to do it again.
It's not necessarily about me or my convenience but about consideration of my kids and others. My boys are tall enough that I'll be asking them to sit pretty soon.
Well you learn something new every day - in all my 60 years this is the first time I have ever heard about blokes sitting down to pee. Seems a bit of a faff - belt, button, fly undone, trousers down, pants down, reverse procedure post-pee compared with stand, unzip, root around in pants, pull out, point and pack back in.
Uni mate informed me of his perceived benefit of sitting to pee… How odd I thought.. particularly when it turned out he sat facing the cistern…
Oh, he's a fan of the Butters reverse cowgirl. (South Park reference)
Sittery-downer here, to avoid earbashing at home (it does make a mess) but standing proud in the glorious outdoors. Morning glory-wise, BITD my technique was to kneel in front of the bowl and bend my turgid todger until it would reliably hit porcelain, taking into account the high risk of split-streaming etc.
Split streaming?
You mean the serpent's piss
There are variants I find: foreskin strangely stuck to bellend, making for a stream at up to and over 90° from the old chap's direction, to the fine double stream you so aptly describe, to a sort of full fan effect. If only we had a twist control like on a hose, thusly - https://www.hozelock.com/product/hose-nozzle-plus/
So, is anyone a trouser dropper?!
This thread has reminded me at my shock when I went to some public toilets and there in the rank of pissers at the trough was a guy with his trousers and pants down around his knees!
I mean come on, you can easily avoid seeing some ones tadger hidden in their hand, but not a full rear end as you walk in!
If we all sat down to wee, we'd all be wrong.
It’s not necessarily about me or my convenience but about consideration of my kids and others. My boys are tall enough that I’ll be asking them to sit pretty soon.
Do keep us posted on how that conversation goes, won't you? 😀
Some of you lot would have a fit in my house. I've been known to be stood having a pee when my son appears and says move over, I need a pee too so we both pee into the toilet bowl at the same time. When the boys were younger, there would often be 3 of us doing it at the same time.
My bathroom doesn't have pee flowing out the door either.
Perhaps some of you need one of these - https://www.marksandspencer.com/super-soft-quick-dry-stripe-pedestal-mat/p/hbp60280648?extid=ps_ps-gpla_ggl_home_ch__-_UK_-_-_-&gclsrc=aw.ds&&gclid=Cj0KCQiAw_H-BRD-ARIsALQE_2M9nyHhm9JEXEi1IkzAbv5heG8lOC8c4cBH5yHjiqK_Tk-_mGSSWGIaAkBPEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds
I bet some of you weirdos scrumple your toilet paper rather than fold it properly before a good arse wipe......................
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gaidong
Free MemberThere are variants I find: foreskin strangely stuck to bellend, making for a stream at up to and over 90° from the old chap’s direction, to the fine double stream you so aptly describe, to a sort of full fan effect. If only we had a twist control like on a hose, thusly – https://www.hozelock.com/product/hose-nozzle-plus//blockquote >
ROFL!
reminds me of Me, Myself and Irene
for the 'avoidance of pee on the floor' folks - what causes your pee to get there? I don't struggle to get every drop in the loo, but often when people are staying it can be a bit of a mess. What goes wrong? Are you peeing at such force a load of it bounces back out of the loo??
My 5 year old thinks he's in the NBA....tries to scor in off the backboard every shot 🙂