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[Closed] Living abroad, 8YO daughter wants to go back to UK. How to deal with it?

GEDA · 2011-06-06T08:05:32Z

We moved to Sweden 4 years ago and from a parents perspective it has been great for the kids. No crime and a very equal society, freedom to run about, climb trees, camp and do loads of things outside. They can cycle to school and the education system is focused on the child and not just results. We do loads of nice things like skating on lakes, skiing, etc. Anyway from my 8 year old daughters point of view when ever she gets tired or finds things hard she goes off on one about how she is so sad here, does not feel at home, does not like the school she goes to, misses the tree house I built for her in our garden in Sheffield, misses the noise of cars and does not feel safe here. At school her teachers say she is doing really well and is happy and has lots of friends (But Swedes are not that honest when it comes to negative stuff so hopefully this is the real picture) We do live in a lovely old flat in the centre of town but it is lacking neighbours and other children to play with. We were thinking of moving to somewhere out of town where there would be more community and the children could run out of the door to their friends houses and also have more neighbours and feel part of things. Problem is that it is a big commitment and I can't tell if it is the right thing to do or not. One of the problems living abroad is missing family and friends and we do not get that many visitors. My parents are farmers so don't get that much free time. I have a good job but my wife is not working which is very unusual in Sweden and she is also wondering what is the best thing for us. We still have a house back in Sheffield which a friend lives in so we can go back there when we want and it still feels like how my daughter remembers it so there is alot of focus for her on it being her real home. She has said she would never forgive us if we sold it. Any advice on how to help my daughter and help her deal with her feelings. Is it worth the risk of moving or just move back to the UK?

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underthethumb

Posts: 0

Free Member

I can vouch for the idea of keeping her busy and involved, it seems it might be as simple as joining some clubs or team sports with other kids of her age.

We recently moved to Florida, kids 12, 5 & 2, we were most worried about the eldest so made an effort to get her out with new friends, At first it seemed a bit too much because at times it felt like we were forcing her to have fun with all these people she had just met but now she has good cirlce of friends and she always has something to do or someone to call on.

The 5yo still asks about home but only occasionally, the youngest doesn't know any different.

We are going home for 2 weeks in the summer so slightly nervous about how they will react when it comes to leaving time? By all accounts that is the true test of where they prefer to be.

Posted : 06/06/2011 2:57 pm

Bushwacked

Posts: 49

Free Member

I moved to Hong Kong when I was 9 and it was the best thing ever for me, but we moved somewhere there were loads of kids my age on the doorstep who were in the same situation so I made loads of friends very quickly.

Posted : 06/06/2011 3:31 pm

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