Lift Incredularity
 

MegaSack DRAW - 6pm Christmas Eve - LIVE on our YouTube Channel

[Closed] Lift Incredularity

41 Posts
28 Users
0 Reactions
110 Views
Posts: 8770
Full Member
Topic starter
 

How many times does the same converstaion get played out in a busy lift...

"Its supposed to fit 13 in!!!"
"13!! never! I can't imagine that!!!'

Well, no - not with your grotesquely obese stature, love. Jesus.

Is all.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:20 pm
Posts: 7100
Free Member
 

How many times does the same converstaion get played out in a busy lift...

I take the stairs so I wouldn't be exposed to such conversations or the angry thin people that listen to them.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:27 pm
Posts: 41395
Free Member
 

*starts "lame thread incedularity" thread* 😛


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:29 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

ha! mine wouldn't move the other day because it was over-weight, despite having one less than the maximum number of people.

I had to get out and take the stairs.

p.s. I'm not that fat, just the only one willing to walk!


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:31 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

or the angry thin people that listen to them.

angry because the lift is full of bloaters ??


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:35 pm
Posts: 25873
Full Member
 

Incredularity. n. A combination of incredulity, hilarity and self-satisfaction.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:36 pm
Posts: 17
Free Member
 

I usually just comment on the interesting increase in assumed average passenger weight. In lifts from teh 60s they assume a 75kg average weight, in the newer lifts they assume 85kg average.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:37 pm
Posts: 14
Free Member
 

I was in the National Museum in Edinburgh at the weekend and got in one of the lifts. It was made by a company called Schindler. I was struck by the incredularity of being in Schindler's Lift.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:38 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

the solution is to make the doors narrower...


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:38 pm
Posts: 17
Free Member
 

I was struck by the incredularity of being in Schindler's Lift.

Yep, we have one of those at my work.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:39 pm
 Kit
Posts: 24
Free Member
 

Yep, we have one of those at my work.

And where I live!


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:41 pm
 Drac
Posts: 50456
 

Can't say I've ever heard that. maybe we don't have dull lives up here in the North.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 12:42 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Can't say I've ever heard that. maybe we don't have dull lives up here in the North.

.... or lifts
😀


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 7:14 pm
Posts: 1
Free Member
 

no schindlers lifts round Plymouth afaik, but plenty of schindlers escalators in '50's post-blitz rebuilt retro Debenhams.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 8:31 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I always take the stairs anyway.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:03 pm
 sv
Posts: 2811
Full Member
 

Otis (and the) Elevators anybody?


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:12 pm
Posts: 0
Full Member
 

If you make a 13 person lift big enough to get 13 people in comfortably you will find that at some point 20 people will squeeze into it and then wonder why the lift makes a non stop trip to the bottom of the lift shaft.

The average weight is calculated at between 76 and 78kgs eg a 13 person lift is rated at a 1000kgs.

Most modern lifts are fitted with load sensors that wont let the lift run when its overloaded most older ones wont have these fitted.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:16 pm
Posts: 7983
Free Member
 

Edit: Note to self. Read thread before posting.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:24 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

BigButSlimmerBloke - Member
I was in the National Museum in Edinburgh at the weekend and got in one of the lifts. It was made by a company called Schindler. I was struck by the incredularity of being in Schindler's Lift.

I was in one of those at the Beatson cancer research place in Glasgow the other week, I pointed it out to my colleague who just rolled his eyes, must be a STW humour thing.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:28 pm
 Bez
Posts: 7382
Full Member
 

Has anyone mentioned Schindler yet? No? They make lifts! Ha ha! Lifts! Sounds like list, you see. Like Schidler's list. NO-ONE CAN HAVE NOTICED THAT! Did no-one notice that? I'm incredularious!


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:29 pm
Posts: 0
Full Member
 

I was at Regent's Park Tube Station yesterday morning. I was waiting for the lift and looking in through the windows partly because lift workings fascinate me and partly because it makes the lift come faster (in the same way as pressing the button many times, sighing, tutting, grimacing at your fellow lift-users and pacing). Anyway, I noticed that there were two pistons pointing upwards from the bottom of the shaft. They looked like smaller versions of the buffers you get at the end of the platform at a station. I guess they are shock absorbers in case the lift cables break?


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:43 pm
Posts: 1
Free Member
 

I forget which, but there is a Douglas Coupland book in which the main protagonist says that the button to close the doors is just there for anxious and impatient people and doesn't do anything.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 9:48 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Karinofnine - Member
I was at Regent's Park Tube Station yesterday morning. I was waiting for the lift and looking in through the windows partly because lift workings fascinate me and partly because it makes the lift come faster (in the same way as pressing the button many times, sighing, tutting, grimacing at your fellow lift-users and pacing). Anyway, I noticed that there were two pistons pointing upwards from the bottom of the shaft. They looked like smaller versions of the buffers you get at the end of the platform at a station. I guess they are shock absorbers in case the lift cables break?

In the event of the lift plummetting uncontrolably towards the ground you just have to jump upward just before it hits the bottom, you'll be fine, everyone else in the lift will be a bloody smear on the floor tho.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 10:13 pm
 Bez
Posts: 7382
Full Member
 

[i]you just have to jump upward just before it hits the bottom, you'll be fine[/i]

Two problems with that theory:
1. You've no idea where the bottom is
2. It's complete and utter bollocks


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 10:32 pm
Posts: 2
Free Member
 

Now hang on Bez, I think you're dismissing this a little too quickly, we could have a plane on a conveyer belt situation here.

How fast will the lift being going when it hits the deck? Lets say, since it's falling in a reasonably air tight tunnel, it has quite a low terminal velocity, say 50mph?
Now all you have to do, in your responsibility as a lift manufacturer, is put a little window in the lift and a red mark on the wall near the bottom so people can see when they have to jump. As long as they jump upwards at 50mph or more, they're sorted.


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 10:39 pm
 rhys
Posts: 63
Free Member
 


 
Posted : 03/06/2010 10:47 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

There's a brilliant sloping conveyor belt you can take your trolley on in Sainsbury's in Newbury.

The trolleys have special wheels so that they jam on the surface of the conveyor belt.

One chap was taking a whole load of trolleys all in one go!

I didn't want to go upstairs, but I went anyway so that I could try the conveyor belt out! It was ace!!


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 7:12 am
Posts: 2
Free Member
 

ASDA in Prescot has the same I think.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 7:15 am
Posts: 251
Full Member
 

[i]There's a brilliant sloping conveyor belt you can take your trolley on in Sainsbury's in Newbury.[/i]

Damn, I was expecting to find out whether the trolleys take off or not.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 7:18 am
Posts: 13764
Full Member
 

Flaperon - Member

Edit: Note to self. Read thread before posting.

why would one want to do that?


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 7:19 am
Posts: 7561
Free Member
 


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 5:05 pm
Posts: 7561
Free Member
 

And


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 5:07 pm
Posts: 1
Full Member
 

WTF goes on in your shed ? 😳


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 5:22 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Thanks for those brant, they're superb!
Have you been to the website and tried the pig pooing game yet?
[url] http://benobve.110mb.com/ [/url]


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 5:28 pm
Posts: 0
Full Member
 

The sloping conveyeors are called Travolators, like an escalator without the steps.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 6:14 pm
Posts: 7561
Free Member
 

Have you been to the website and tried the pig pooing game yet?

i have teh mac and that app dunt werk


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 6:31 pm
Posts: 7561
Free Member
 

though actually I do run parralels and I'm that intrigued, I'm going to have a go.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 6:33 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

Liftman - Member
The sloping conveyeors are called Travolators, like an escalator without the steps.

Thanks - I didn't know what they were called.

No trolleys took off whilst we there, although we didn't ride on the second one, although I wanted to. MrsJulianA wasn't so keen.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 8:09 pm
Posts: 50252
Free Member
 

[url=


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 8:16 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

This would be fun to do on a Saturday night!

[img] [/img]

And only a quid (or an Euro - currently 82.5 pence) for all that fun.

Probably wouldn't go on the Travelator though, which is a bit of a drawback.

Have also seen some VERY interesting pylons today. Sorry, no pics. Can take some on Monday if there's any interest, as I hope to be going to work again then (even though I offered to punch someone for inviting me to 'Do superheroness with team amazing' - surely no jury would convict?))


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 8:29 pm
Posts: 0
Full Member
 

They have travelators in Tesco in Selsden and Orpington - and Asda in Brighton. If you push slowly you can make the trolley go a bit. I tried lifting the back two wheels off the metal last week and the trolley did move a bit, next time I'm going to try lifting the front wheels off, then each side in pairs in turn. I think it probably looks a bit odd to the other shoppers, but no worse than when I am on tiptoe peering in through lift windows or running along the platform at Finsbury Park excitedly muttering "There's a steam engine! A steam engine! A STEAM ENGINE", and then when my train came, getting on it and saying to a man "I'm so sorry but I really need to stand there - there's a steam engine on the other track". The man moved - funny, seemed glad to be away from me.


 
Posted : 04/06/2010 9:07 pm
Posts: 0
Free Member
 

I'm glad that travelators are becoming more prevalent. I shall have to try lifting the wheels again. Let me know how your experiements go.

You always have to try to get the best view possible of steam engines - I thought everyone knew that!


 
Posted : 05/06/2010 7:11 am