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Going for a very wet and muddy ride in half an hour to a Roman Site, with a very old mate.
Alright @donkeysled - how did the ride go?
donkeysled, admitting your problem to yourself and others is very brave and the first step in dealing with this addiction. Having seen this at close quarters in my formative years - I have an understanding of how tough it can be. I can understand how what you have been through and the PSTD you carry has led to your self-medication with alcohol - I have seen that all too often. Other people on this thread have more constructive perspectives than I have - but I wanted you to know that this is more common than many people imagine. Take care.
@donkeysled Brilliant work in accepting your problem with the drink. Particularly with the many other things you have/had in your life, I wish you'd think again about getting help from psychiatric/psychotherapy services. As others have said, you're already medicating - it's just that the drug you're using at the moment is one of the most damaging.
Where do you live? Maybe somebody might fancy a ride out with you
Hi donkeysled, I'm another one listening to you. Your backstory sounds very traumatic, those memories must be very hard to deal with and I can understand you self medicating with alcohol. I too have traumatic childhood memories and was self medicating to cope. 20 years ago I reached a point where I was ready to deal with my issues and went to see my GP. I was reluctant like you to take pills but needed them to restore some perspective so I took them for a while and they gave me a breathing space. I also had a series of sessions of psychodynamic psychotherapy which allowed me to explore my issues. Anyway, long story short, I am now calmer ,happier and more relaxed than I have ever been. What I want to say to you is that recovery from PTSD and alcoholism is possible. You will suffer setbacks but with your eyes on the prize you can get there. Hopefully one day you will overcome these obstacles. Good luck, it's a long but very worthwhile journey.
Hi donkeysled , Hope you are OK today
Just bumped in to your thread.
Dont assume that pills are the prescribed answer. If you want to manage drink, you are going to have to come to terms with he past, and you will need support to do this.
Try to find a psychotherapist, not a psychiatrist.
Agree with this.
However you have got to want to help yourself.
It sounds like you are acknowledging that you have an issue, the next step is to do something about it. Dont dismiss your GP (its only going to be pills) before you try. Maybe try ringing your GP and see what they say. If they are any good they will support. Research whats out there yourself (all constructive stuff to help you move forward).
Research charitable counselling organisations in your area. They can do free or low cost counselling / psychotherapy. Research EMDR.
I would certainly try therapy route first, but dont disregard pills. I know a couple of people who use pills when they know they are struggling but absolutely do not want to be on them long term.
Good luck.
Morning @donkeysled sounds like you're going through the ringer mate.
Nobody here will judge you and as you're hopefully finding out, writing this stuff down can help and venting to strangers on the internet can be even more cathartic. So we're all here for that.
I am sorry for what you are going through. It sounds like you have had harrowing experiences that would traumatise anyone.
Regarding 12 step programmes like Alcoholics Anonymous there is a lot of talk about a "higher power" but some members who are not religious consider this to be the group of people working to get well and sober rather than a deity. If you were to attend a meeting nobody would judge you for your religious beliefs. Rather they would welcome you and not put any pressure on you to share anything until you felt happy to do so. Honestly I think going to an AA meeting could not hurt you and may be a real benefit.
One thing that was recommended to me was keeping a gratitude list. I add to this every day and it does help me enormously. Items can be as simple as "I am grateful for the sunshine today" and once you start you will see lots of good things.
It will not be easy and I think you need help from other people to start to get better. I am sure that you can get it on here. I don't know where you are but if you are anywhere near Gloucestershire I would be really happy to go for a ride and/or coffee with you.
At the age of 52 I quit the booze. It was pretty much 2 years ago to the day. I was drinking too much too often. A daily drinker who would regularly drink until black out. My family were fed up of having to tell me stuff again that they told me the day before because I had forgotten it. I knew I was killing myself. I tried to cut down and that’s when things got worse. My body reacted badly with the DT’s. My heart was beating out of my chest, high blood pressure, dizziness, night sweats the lot. I woke up one night after abstaining the evening before and the world was spinning. Thought I was having a stroke. I didn’t wake the wife up as I didn’t want to cause a fuss as I thought she would call an ambulance. So I gripped the sheets and rode it out. Eventually falling back asleep. The next day I said that’s it I quit. I saw my GP and got some pills to help ease the DTs, bought and read Allen Carrs control your drinking book (this helped massively) and took it a day at a time. So many positives now. Better sleep, weight loss, less anxiety, more money in the bank, my children are proud of me rather than resentful. My wife quit with me. She liked a drink as much as I did but she could see the harm it was doing our bodies and our family. Go see your GP, come out to your friends and family, hunker down and wait it out. It does get easier.
"find a psychotherapist" +1