[Closed] I’ve just been diagnosed with “gammon flu” 🙁

We really need to pork about these terrible jokes.

Bacon bit when I can think of a pun.

it's risky making diagnoses over the internet; even rasher when it's your own illness

Someone should call a hambulance

I feel like i’m Out of the frying pan...into the bun..so to speak..

DrP

Quite a rib-tickler.

I’ve lost a rib with laughing, anyone got one spare?

anyone got one spare?

Did you get some hamtibiotics?

You swine

I think you're telling porky pies..and need a slap around the chops to snap out of it ..did your symptoms include any scratchings ..that must have been frustrating if you are in any way ham fisted ..you are not spamming by any chance ?

Watch out the GMC don't hambush you for bringing the profession into disrepute.

Oh come on, pull the other one.

You should get some oinkment for that rasher.

Worse if you're a morning porcine I understand, you shouldn't feel gilty for taking a duvet day.

whenever I get a rash I just put a bit of lardon

It's not a joke, It's a pigs tail, & It's tooearly.

Tempted to contribute to the thread, but don't want to make a pigs ear of it, so I'll just trot off...

It's nowt but a poor scene

This thread had sow much promise but frazzled out

All of this started in fine style
...

Hmmm got the urge for some bacon sarnies for some reason.

sounds like a bag case of the meat sweats.

But you’re a doctor - pull yourself together man

Physician, veal thyself!

Watch out the GMC don't hambush you for bringing the profession into disrepute.

That would be the Gammon Medical Council....

Scratching(s) ? You can get a cream for that .