Ive never seen a pushy parent.
Glad to hear it, and don't get me wrong, 99% of the parents I see are exactly what you've experienced, but the pushy ones are definitely out there. One lad at our club looks round at his dad every time he touches the ball, his dads body language is rarely positive so he is constantly looking for reassurance that he hasn't messed up. Unfortunately this is completely counter productive as the poor kid is so nervous that he makes mistakes and then worries even more. Personally I don't think he's playing at the right level but his dad thinks he just needs to work harder. I'm pretty sure the coaching team will step in soon, they appear to have been trying to bring him along but with very limited success.
Just a bit of an update and nearly a year in. Its a shame that in some ways I don't feel like I can talk openly about his journey, I have learnt over the last year that football is a very very odd world, not based purely on developing talent for some of the reasons others have talked about above. You also have to be very careful what you say and don't say as a parent.
Trials have been had at more than 1 academy, and to be honest he was not ready for that level having only first touched a football 3 years previously. However the trials have certainly opened ours/his eyes to what academy football is and in many ways we are glad he is not in it right now. I think aged 14+ he will be able to make more of his own informed decisions on what opportunity academy football will offer him, and what it will take away from him.
What had always intrigued me was the comments about academy teams are there to nurture 2-3 key players. I can now totally see that, but then without sounding harsh, is that any great surprise. The kids with talent do stand out, and you can see the ones that have the talent, so yes they do need a team around them, and you can see whos in which role.
Our son's journey is still upward at the moment, and various things have happened in the last 6 months that allude to that. At least now he knows what the next step will be and can prep for it, and is aware of the sacrifices that will bring in his personal life, but an academy could take it away at any time even if he signs a 2 year contract.
For me it means my life has changed massively over the last year. My weekends are gone and I just ferry him from training session to match to training session, but I have no problem doing that, its great to see his journey, and actually see all the talented kids around him too.
Just a further brief update.
Things still going well, in some ways exceptionally well. He’s still not signed for an academy but we are happy with that, again I don’t want to go in to too much detail but some of that is where we live and rules on travel distances for our sons age. He’s had more than 1 offer, but we are not prepared to travel silly distances (which actually would be against the rules)
He is playing county football and national level football, against some of the best teams in the country and teams from other countries , he was recently being watched by England coaches.
Through the processes that have happened we are beginning to understand that our lad does have some talent. we are being advised for now not to worry too much, and that academies will come in time
Again though we take nothing for granted, school is the priority, and we still talk about life after football regularly, it’s just becoming clearly to us he has some talent that is worth supporting him develop as much as possible!
Bit of a further update.
A tough couple of months at the end of last season. He stopped playing where he was (a local EFL development team) and their academy team offered him a trial. It all went very well and looked promising. However at the end of a 3 month trial ,out of the blue the answer was no. This left our son club less at the end of a season. Luckily we knew a couple of local none EFL clubs would take him straight in (thankfully) and this kept him going, although it was a big knock back.
Again in the off season he was selected to play for at national level, but this again was hard for him with team mates as he is the only 'unsigned' player, and pretty much the rest of the squad is made up of Cat 1 (premier league) players. However good news came from this selection camp, as I was approached by a Premier League football club who are interested in him. He also has another match coming up soon against a premier league club that we have been told are interested in him.
We now take everything with a pinch of salt, it would be great if he gets an offer from 1 or both, if both we wouldnt have a clue which to choose. Weirdly it would appear that having a connection with the lower league EFL club has hindered him progressing in the academy system.
If he does get in to a Cat 1 academy, this is could be a turning point from an Education perspective. So far he plays football 3 x evenings a week and a match or 2 at the weekend. Cat 1's expect day release too, which I am uncomfortable with when he is just starting GCSEs. We know his education will suffer as a result. In the past we have already had conversations that if football takes over, and then he is ultimately unsuccessful in it, we will support him however we can to regain his education.