[Closed] Flirting then - Good, Bad, Harmless Fun, or can only end badly?

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The train now arriving at platform 3 is............

And Fatsimon to the forum please

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think of it like shopping for bike bits: window shopping is fine, imagining how the item would work for you is fine, handling the goods is ok (just to see if it feels as good as it looks, you may find it has nasty plastic components that aren't obvious at first), trying it is ok for a dry run, HOWEVER once you've ridden it and got it all mucky and gungy you can't take it back!

I've mostly just let girls flirt with me over the years. Haven't had tonnes but in five years I've probably had a dozen birds who have been more than a one off. Then there's the floozies you invariably pull in clubs as a student. I never really went out of my way to flirt so to speak (I'm thinking of Hugh Grant type flirting)....just kind of wandered around clubs looking for eye contact and then just danced.

It's worked well so far. Will probably actually have to try harder as I get older/lose hair.

My best line is Me: "Oh I'm studying Biomedical Science" Girl: "Do you want to be a doctor" Me: "Sure"

Then they look at you with big puppy eyes. Dice is loaded in your favour from there on.

Oh taz you say the sweetest things....

To the OP I feel we need a little more information on the situation in order to make a comment

Taz speaks the truth

where does flirting stop?

Would pictures be of any use on this thread?

Flirting, and being flirted back to, is good for the soul

tazzy - perfect analogy for the question. Each step in your bike component "assessment" is entirely reasonable in itself (applied to bikes, of course) - except having the mud at the end of the ride

It should never stop...

Flirting stops whenever I could lose my job, get accused of stalking, sexual harassment or incur the wrath of a 250lb Goliath of a rugby player.

Only some blokes can get away with proper out of the blue, cheeky as hell flirting. One of them is a friend of mine who has taken home incredibly beautiful Oxbridge students he talked to on the street.... once convinced am insanely hot stripper to go home with him for free....you know the deal....Hawkeye Pierce type of character.

incur the wrath of a 250lb Goliath of a rugby player.

because he doesn't like you flirting with him?

Flirting is like trying on clothes or testing electronics.
There's no harm done so long as you don't get them wet.

because he doesn't like you flirting with him?

Ha no, his female companion. It's happened before.

SaxonRider - Member
Would pictures be of any use on this thread?
POSTED 9 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST

Errr, no. I'm far too handsome 😯

The only thing I have found is that even that without flirting in any way shape or form, unattractive/overweight (usually both) ladies find my generally cordial and pleasant demeanour to be a sign I fancy them. Moral of this story? Be thoroughly unpleasant to anyone you don't want to shag.

...once convinced am insanely hot stripper to go home with him for free.

Um. Okay. And this is a good thing? 😯

incur the wrath of a 250lb Goliath of a rugby player.

Flirting with disaster

I've been flirting with a young girl on the Internet lately, she's only 15 but we've been getting on really well and last night I asked her to meet me.... she then told me she was a policewoman and in the CID,
HOW COOL IS THAT AT FIFTEEN!!!!! 8)

Khani earlier.

[img] [/img]

You got me.. 😳
Edit..no...its not me...I don't wear glasses.....

I've been flirting with a young girl on the Internet lately, she's only 15 but we've been getting on really well and last night I asked her to meet me.... she then told me she was a policewoman and in the CID,
HOW COOL IS THAT AT FIFTEEN!!!!!

That did amuse me lol

At the risk of setting myself up for a serious ribbing....

I was working in a bar when I was a student and started flirting with one of the new barmaids, which was returned by her, things progressed, we started exchanging steamy text messages and stayed over at each others places after shifts (though nothing happened. Genuinely) This was over a period of maybe 3 months.

Anyway one day we're at work, it's mental busy and I start doing some glass collecting and replenishing the glasses behind the bar. As I'm doing such things my lady friend is in may way, so I put my hand on her hip and firmly moved her out of my way, I got a dirty look and an 'Excuse me would be nice!' but I though nothing of it.

Two days later I get pulled to one side buy my boss (and friend) for him to tell me that my lady ex friend has filed an official complaint of sexual harassment against me, saying I'd touched her 'inappropriately' on the night I've just described. I racked my brain to to think what I could have done and that's all I could think of.

It really knocked me for six, I was pretty confident with women previous to this, flirted a lot but always new where the 'line' was (working with girls who get flirted at all night, you pick up what works and what gets you slapped) but I felt like I didn't know the rules anymore so was/ am really shy around the ladies now, to the point that in the 9 years since that happened, I've had 2 short <6 months relationships and a 1 (well, 2) night stand. That time includes a 4 year dry spell in the sack (currently running at a year). I suspect this is because talking to girls scares the proverbial out of me because I don't want to cross the 'line'

Moral of this story, be carefull out there!

Um. Okay. And this is a good thing?

Sounds quite apealling for a one (or two) off...

Wow TH thats a sad (and very odd) story 😥

Flirting can be fun but I see some real pillocks at work who have no idea where the line should be drawn and are very lucky that they haven't received complaints. My GF is the result of some very naughty flirting but it took an awful lot of very careful mutual probing (oooooeerrrr 😉 ) before any real line was crossed over.

Tom, start flirting again mate. Just don't do it at work or if you do just keep it innocuous like asking the woman out for a drink after you've chatted. Just keep it casual like.

You can get quite far by just talking without innuendo or touchy stuff.

TH - honestly, sounds to me like she got fed up waiting and eventually felt rejected and vengeful. Three months of flirting?! 😯 Possibly.

I bumped into a girl i used to flirt with in work tonight,we had about 10 drinks together then walked home and tried to scale the fence to get into the old vetch field swansea,dont quite know how that happened but it was a good night.And now i,m covered in anti vandal paint with the vauge memory of a fumbled hook fingerded g spot inpection.Better than watching eastender i guess 🙂

Gosh, how romantic.

😯

You got anti vandal paint on you whilst playing with her g spot? She sounds nice! 🙂

There's Swansea for you...!

You got anti vandal paint on you whilst playing with her g spot? She sounds nice!

What sort of girl wears anti-vandal paint? They must be scary in Swansea 😯

Flirting isn't bad for either sex as long as your single or not really committed to anyone no matter when someone says its harmless. Friendly, being friends, saying hello to someone is fine but when you go that little bit further and feel you've still got it, 'Jane' seems quite nice actually etc you are on a path that could twist your whole view/perspective on what is normal and not.

Plus.... especially with girls too much male attention means once a girls head has been turned, only a spade would turn it back again 😯

You got anti vandal paint on you whilst playing with her g spot? She sounds nice!

Who says it was hers that was being played with eh?

Flirting eh.. well I’ve always been a little reserved TBH. I’ve never chased a girlie and always stood well back when mates have waded in with both feel. I’ve always seemed to be very very lucky when meeting girlies, all the ones I’ve met and had a relationship with have been absolutely smashing and good jolly hockey sticks, consequentially I’ve never had any problems with straying/wandering due to flirts, they’ve all been of good solid stock, me too.
I’ve been stalked mind, and chased by girls, some don’t know when to just stop chasing, some seem hell bent on some sort of revenge when you turn down their advances, which I find quite disturbing. One in particular knew I was in a relationship that was solid yet pursued me to the point of sitting outside my house in her car watching mine and my partners movements, scary.
Work flirts are so off the scale, never done, never will, never acknowledged a flirt, I think I just can’t see the signs, I may have anti flirt glasses on or something cos’ colleagues have commented on girls that have flirted with me yet I’ve never noticed. I must be blind.
Yet I like general banter, happy to giggle out loud with girls, so long as I don’t detect a political angle or some gerrymandering then I’m fine, as soon as I sense some overt communication signals I bow out gracefully and that’s the end of that

Maybe I'm a bit old-fashioned in my interpretation of flirting but most of the posts above seem to be referring to 'chatting-up' rather than flirting, in other words the intention is to 'pull'. To my mind, flirting isn't about pulling, there is no intention to take it any further. So, in that respect, as long as both parties do actually respect the parameters it is totally harmless. If either party oversteps the boundary, trouble will most likely eventually follow. Plus, even if the flirters and flirtees respect the boundaries, their partners probably won't recognise the same boundaries 😯

To my mind, flirting isn't about pulling, there is no intention to take it any further.

True.
Even if you drive a Lada, no harm in flicking through the Ferrari brochure now and then.
Or so my missus tells me.

Flirting to me- is a smile, a compliment to a colleague, word-play. Asking for a cuddle as feeling down. etc etc.

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah bless. The blokes in your office must be sick of the constant arms-outstretched, quivery-bottom-lipped 'I'm feeling really sensitive today' approaches by now Hora

Thats homo-erotic, bottom-fondling sexual harassment, more than flirting

mikey3's 'feeding the horse through the letterbox' is a different ball game altogether 😆

I got told off for flirting a while back - not full-on bo**ocking, just semi-joking "watch yourself" type telling-off - for some cracks I made with a pair of lovely, very pleasant and not-entirely-unattractive event medics. I wouldn't even have considered it flirting, but maybe it was construed that way due to the innuendo content with people of the other sex that i'd only just met.

Perhaps it was the point where one of them, talking about us evolving from quadrupedal animals, said something along the lines of "we were born to be down on our knees". I couldn't help but guffaw, i'm afraid...

I once 'flirted' with the girl who worked behind the counter in our staff canteen. When I say flirted, she said she'd seen me ride my motorbike into work and asked if I'd take her out on the back of it. I said I would, but never thought any more about it. That turned into getting abusive letters, birthday cards (the same card sent multiple times with with the content getting more and more irate) and facebook stalking of me, my friends and family until I had to get HR involved, deactivated my Facebook profile and changed my works mobile number. It was pretty horrible and was something that happened from a fairly harmless conversation that I'd immediately dismissed.

I'm very careful with what I say to people now, and whilst I remain chatty with people I know, I'm quite guarded with those I don't.

And I'm an ugly b@stard, God knows what its like if you're a looker...

So by the sound of it she'd already clocked and fancied you. In her mind that conversation was the confirmation. She probably exchanged talk with you before but you saw it previously as worker/chat/serving- she didn't.

I also imagine she royally strummed her invisible guitar over you quite a bit too. 😆

😆 It was my steely 1000 yard stare after doing 120 miles from Suffolk to Bracknell that did it....

She was proper nuts though, she got her sisters to contact my brother and mates telling them that we were in love and that she planned to marry me. The last words I said to her were ' You're not going to charge me for that extra toast are you?' - not dissimilar to my first words which were 'Have you got any spoons'....

Seriously, I know how to romance the ladies...

She sounds like a typical STW'er.....a dabhand at inter-social skills 😆

Posted 3 hours ago # Report-Postbikebouy - Member
Flirting eh.. well I’ve always been a little reserved TBH. .... I think I just can’t see the signs, I may have anti flirt glasses on or something cos’ colleagues have commented on girls that have flirted with me yet I’ve never noticed. I must be blind.
Yet I like general banter, happy to giggle out loud with girls, so long as I don’t detect a political angle or some gerrymandering then I’m fine, as soon as I sense some overt communication signals I bow out gracefully and that’s the end of that

This. I even got burned accidentally when encouraged in the Summer of '09 to join the office "party crowd" on a Friday night. Some typically drunken flirting must have gone on but to me it was Men Bahaving Badly style drunken humour. After one of the girls obtained a phsyco - posessive boyfriend, I got "fraped" by him via my comments on her facebook. When then talking to one of her (and at the time mine) office mates about it, I got somehow shoutingly-across-the-office accused of being wanton of her - becuase I slagged of said boyfriend. Before I new it I'd been accused of sleeping with her (she was party to this and annoyingly didnt deny it, despite being aware of my family situation) despite the fact the only time I crashed at her flat was in her lounge with 3 other office people as we'd all left a club at 4am.

Needless to say I immediately "left" said party group and left the (now obviously) shallow ones to themselves - all I ever wanted was to enjoy myself with a few beers. It just goes to show, even when you don't try it on, apparantly you have done so :-/

Having my head down at my desk and having the office social politics replaced by STW had been a relief (mostly).

I really like flirting. It's fun and you quickly work out who is doing it for fun and who is potentially more serious. It happens a lot less now I'm old but it's still a nice tingle when it does happen. I'm telling you, those ladies in the retirement home are FOXES!