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Dont call me Babe.
 

[Closed] Dont call me Babe.

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[#3630818]

I love the Guardian, I do. But sometimes it does disappear into delicious self-parody. In Scotland the collective working-class term of endearment used to be Hen, that still the case?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2012/feb/01/dont-call-me-babe-on-the-bus

What is my crime? Just politely contacting my local bus company to let them know that I don't like it when their bus drivers use terms such as "love", "darling" and "babe". I pointed out that I generally find their drivers friendly and courteous but that when some of them use that language I find it demeaning. I wasn't angry, I didn't ask to make a formal complaint, I wasn't trying to get anyone into trouble, I'm not trying to get anyone fired, I didn't threaten legal action โ€“ I just thought they might like to know how the actions of some of their staff made me feel.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:12 am
 grum
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Er....


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:13 am
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Why not babes?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:14 am
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Long since been the standard for public employees - are you still living in the 70s?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:14 am
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I often use sweetheart, I am often surprised at how often people see it as some kind of insult or attack. Some people are just too sensitive.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:17 am
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round here they call you 'shug'. no idea WTF it's supposed to mean, it's bloody annoying though.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:17 am
 D0NK
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What she wrote sounds fair enough to me

<edit>I don't like it when strangers call me "mate", I'm not your mate

(and "excuse me mate" is normally a prelude to either trying it on or requesting me to do something I probably don't want to do)


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:18 am
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Sounds like she needs to calm down a bit

They always take it positively when you point out that calming down helps ๐Ÿ˜€


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:18 am
 br
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I call all women 'love' and men 'mate', mainly as I have the worlds' worst memory for names - but with a broad (well Southerners' think it is) Yorkshire accent it seems all accept it as fine.

And tbh my misses (Southern girl) calls everyone 'darling', or her good lady-friends 'chick'.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:19 am
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[b]OI! TJ! PUT YOUR NICKERS ON! AND MAKE ME A CUP OF TEA!!![/b]

๐Ÿ˜‰


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:19 am
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Posted : 01/02/2012 11:19 am
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It's not a term I'd ever use. I leave gender specific terms of endearment for my g/f although I do reserve the use of the word "sweetie" to female pals who've done something above and beyond the normal call of duty. Like giving me cake.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:19 am
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Posted : 01/02/2012 11:21 am
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Sugar tits is a favourite of mine - not really got a favourite for the girls though


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:21 am
 D0NK
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good shout Rad ๐Ÿ™‚

BR if I've met someone atleast once mate is OK but not complete strangers.

BTW I don't go mental about this sort of thing, just irks me a little.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:22 am
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Binners, that's post du jour for me. Well done. Have a gold star.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:23 am
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Everyone says 'love' round here when speaking to someone of the opposite sex.

I think it's a very nice term of endearment.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:23 am
 grum
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What Donk said, it's actually pretty difficult to argue with any of what she says, though I notice mcboo hasn't actually bothered to make an argument so it's just trolling really.

I used to get called 'love' by male bus drivers in Leeds though, which always seemed a bit odd.

TBH love seems ok to me, but sweetheart or darling do seem a bit patronising. Dunno why.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:24 am
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'shug'?

Proper West Ox locals use 'shag'.

Allllroiiyyyte Shaaaaag?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:25 am
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Its the epic snobbery implicit in the article, working class folk everywhere talk like this.

Me I've taken it to an extreme, where I call the 50yr old SE London geezer sitting opposite me "Suger-Lips" and "Hot-Stuff". He's getting used to it after 2yrs but I do get the odd "Shaaaaaaaraaaaaap" in retaliation.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:25 am
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They tend to call everyone duck around Notts/Lincs sort of area


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:25 am
 D0NK
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working class folk everywhere talk like this.
Sweeeeping generalisation.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:27 am
 grum
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Its the epic snobbery implicit in the article, working class folk everywhere talk like this.

Hmm, shouldn't the same standards of behaviour apply whatever your social background? Apart from anything else in a customer service role it's just a bit unprofessional. I've worked in call centres before and would never dream of saying love, or even mate.

You are the one bringing class into it, who's the snob?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:27 am
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The one I hate is "my friend" when used by strangers usually shop assistants .As in hello my friend can I help you ?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:27 am
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Old Bristolians still call people babber ,as in alright me babber ?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:29 am
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personally I find it degrading when wimmin, call me: pet, love, darling or drive

Who do I write to get these evil patronising women fired?

๐Ÿ™„


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:29 am
 IHN
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Some people are just looking for stuff to offend them.

When the phrases babe, hen, love, mate, fella, me duck, guvnor, sweetheart, darling etc are used by a cabbie/bus driver/person behind a counter in a shop/whomever, it's generally an indication that they are not a po-faced, miserable git.

Anyone who finds those terms offensive when used in that manner, generally, is.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:30 am
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mcboo - Member

Its the epic snobbery implicit in the article, working class folk everywhere talk like this.

Oh the irony. You really do have no idea do you. How snobbish does that make you

๐Ÿ™„


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:30 am
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Isn't "Shug" short for Sugar?

I quite like being called "Treacle" by the Chip Shop lady! Always used to get "Moi Luvver" when down Bristol way too. I don't think I've ever been offended by it though, it's nice to be informal.

Also, did anyone else automatically think of "Voice of the Beehive" when reading the thread title? No? Oh, okay...


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:32 am
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Or
[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:32 am
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Yep. People casually using terms of endearment and friendship.
That's what's wrong with the world these days... ๐Ÿ™„


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:32 am
 MSP
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Last year when visiting Cornwall with my German girlfriend, the bloke behind the counter at a bakers said something along the lines of "hello my lover, what can I get for you then", to which my girlfriend turned to me in a state of shock and proclaimed she had never met this man before in her life.

I laughed uncontrollably for a very very long time.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:33 am
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TJ I'm as common as muck and proud of it. How's your po-face this morning?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:34 am
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[i]to which my girlfriend turned to me in a state of shock and proclaimed she had never met this man before in her life.
[/i]

The lady doth protest too much ๐Ÿ˜‰


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:34 am
 grum
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Noticeably its all men criticising the woman quoted in the OP. I guess you might feel differently if there was a cultural legacy of men being belittled and discriminated against (and still got paid less for doing the same jobs).


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:34 am
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Problem with 'Babe' is it's hardly without sexual connotations, is it?

Unless the drivers call every female passenger babe then there's a possible element of judgment being shown prior to using it.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:35 am
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Two things Mcboo - you show your snobbery with the sterotypical reference to "the working class" and you don't understand the difference between "Hen" which has no sexual connotations and is not degrading and "babe" which is.

I suspect yo really do live in the 70s


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:36 am
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So what do you say if you bump into someone? Oops, sorry sir?! apologies my good man?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:36 am
 grum
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TJ I'm as common as muck and proud of it. How's your po-face this morning?

Didn't we go through this in another thread? Where you were claiming to be a 'salt of the earth' 'common as muck' type but to turned out you had a totally normal middle class upbringing?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:37 am
 timc
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pathetic


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:37 am
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[i]I guess you might feel differently if there was a cultural legacy of men being belittled and discriminated against (and still got paid less for doing the same jobs).[/i]

I guess that would depend on whether I thought the bus driver(s) were belittling me and discriminating against me, which gives an indication of the chip on my shoulder, or was just being friendly.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:38 am
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round here they call you 'shug'. no idea WTF it's supposed to mean

Sugar?


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:39 am
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I always find 'chum' gives an element of personalisation to any apology whilst leaving the recipient in some doubt as to whether it was used in freindly or slightly derogatory way.


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:39 am
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I do you Sir / Ma'am when addressing people I do not know. " Excuse me Sir - I'll just squeeze past here"


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:39 am
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Oh God - that's it drain any form of friendliness/emotion/social niceties (hmmm, spelling?) out of life until we all just grunt at each other at the self-service checkouts....

jota180 - Member
They tend to call everyone duck around Notts/Lincs sort of area

Round my way it's Me Duck or Me Old Boot (Beaut', I think).....Cambs/Lincs border....

I wish people would call me 'honey, darling, moooyyy luvvarrr etc. a bit more often.

Bloke at work calls me sugartits; I go along with it but inside it makes me feel like an objectified piece of meat...... ๐Ÿ˜ ๐Ÿ™„ ๐Ÿ˜€


 
Posted : 01/02/2012 11:40 am
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