[Closed] Anyone had partner cheat and forgiven them

Ah OK, my personal opinion that was. Quite an insight this evening into the male pysche. Reckon I have as much chance of understanding them as men understanding women. 😉

emsz. I believe so yes.

It's just two/three/four lots of eye candy.

Them being intimate with each other just makes it's easier for the watcher to relate to whats happening.

If he see's a tongue, it's not just a girls tongue, it becomes his tongue.

He'll see stunning girls kissing but only one set of lips will be that of a woman.

They do the same with hetro images, but see themselves as that man, but by looking at another man, they can't use their imagination fully if the man looks slightly different.

By turning that man into a woman, the imagination is freed up.

I've just been searching youtube for skanky videos... this one is a clip from ITV news....

[EDIT]

Hmmm... find them yourselves. I'm snowed in and need my log on for the next couple of days.

Yay! i've found my perfect job..Thanks TSY

Do you mean the audtions one?

The pole dancing one.

In my experience, fantasies are better left as just that. Years ago, my partner at the time 'arranged' a threesome with one of her mates as a 'present' for my birthday. If I'm to be honest, it was great at the time, albeit short lived! Afterwards though, the doubts and jealousies started. If she spent time with her mate, I couldnt see it as that, I always assumed they'd end up in bed together, (which I found out later was very much the case), and the jealousy started to eat away at me, to the point where we inevitably split up. In hindsight, I have to agree that it was all a bit skanky and cheap, to quote others on this thread, and to recap my first comment, I wish I'd never got involved. Cheating's cheating, it's entirely irrelevant whether it's with a man or a woman.

Just seen this thread

Really enjoyed it

I now fancy a Kebab - and I've never tried one before

Is that cheating on the Chinese take away (that I love) next door ? 🙂

Although - I've just had salmon and wild mushroom risoto - Thats rice so not cheating.......

Indeedy yup.

Had to wait for Mrs Removed to go to bed before I could comment 🙂

In my mid twenties I went back to uni and ended up going out with a luvverly American lass. After a few months of young love, she got all antsy and eventually confessed she had been seeing a girl for nearly a year.

Turned out, her girlfriend was a girl I'd fancied for years. I was [b]absolutely delighted[/b], so I fit in with the general (male) consensus. Was a magical Summer and only had a very positive impact on our relationship.

Will concede that it may have got messy long term, but she went back to the states before the spell had a chance to break!

So what we are concluding then is that you are all a bunch of dirty pervs and all us women should just have one massive love in like in some dodgy 80's styleeee pr0no? 😉

I do love this place 🙂

emma - you now have half the population of STW thinking "yes please"

This all seems based on the pemise that relationships between humans are in the natural state monogamous which I doubt is the case.

We are subject to such extreme conditioning on this matter that it hard to break out of the 'victorian' mind set we have inhereited.

Its not to long ago that Julius Caesar spent more time with his gay lover than his wife over the course of his life or that Hannibal took his boyfriend on his escapdes or Achilles took a boy as his interest in a Troy (though this is a fiction?)

We are currently so dependant on an ideal imposed by others that its hard to think that its as arbritrary as wearing a wedding ring on a certain finger or that father christmas exists.

I used to be very monogamous, thinking it was the highest evolution I could attain of myself. Now not so much 😀

Plum

I would find it is as hard to forgive as any other infidelity issue the genders are hardly the critical issue here as it is still unfaithful.
I am generally not the forgiving type as , despite plumbs inability to control his groins, I have a managed fidelity without any great problem

FWIW ex of mine was very def bi.she and i were together for some time.nothing ever happened in that time. it was novel and cool to begin with, but after a while it started to dawn on me and thru talking i realised all she mainly got off on was the idea of the birds. you soon start thinking when, youre doing the deed, are you actually thinking about me? girl im with now is def in to me as a man and all that represents, plus its my "blokes bits" that she gets off on and thats much better.
if i met another girl who was as into woman as my ex it would be a def no go.when your going through the motions you want to know the woman youre with is totally into you...and nothing else.

I feel dirty after reading all this.
Cheatings cheating, end of.
How about self abuse?

Girl on girl is more for those who're insecure , perhaps with a small willy or just not confident in bed, perhaps even selfish.

or just so drunk they fell asleep while going down on the first girl leaving the two of them to go at it. 😳

😆

I eat like a woman.

Back to the op,bin her.

Had to wait for Mrs Removed to go to bed before I could comment

In my mid twenties I went back to uni and ended up going out with a luvverly American lass. After a few months of young love, she got all antsy and eventually confessed she had been seeing a girl for nearly a year.

Turned out, her girlfriend was a girl I'd fancied for years. I was absolutely delighted, so I fit in with the general (male) consensus. Was a magical Summer and only had a very positive impact on our relationship.

Will concede that it may have got messy long term, but she went back to the states before the spell had a chance to break!

A similar thing happened to a very good friend of mine about ten years ago - his other half had a few regular 'friends' that she'd occasionally bring home and he'd occasionally be woken up with a nudge, inviting him to go and play. It worked as their relationship was secure, and it did stop once they became parents.

However, just recently the female half did leave, only this time it was for a man. Apparently she's now also engaged to this new fellah, which was an additional kick in the guts for my friend.

Makes you wonder how long things had either been going on or what was happening for her to leave what was previously a good relationship.

No matter how secure your relationship is in these circumstances, fundamentally people 'play' because they are bored deep down.

A wife that strays with another female?

Flipping 'eck, the stuff dreams are made of... 😀

No matter how secure your relationship is in these circumstances, fundamentally people 'play' because they are bored deep down.

...and today's sweepingly generalised psychological titbit is bought to you by Hora. 😉

OP your mate should bin his girlfriend , the fact she went through with the deed in the first place shows she has little/no respect for him irrespective of the fact she was 'drunk'

With regard to the 3some debate , my first ever 'jiggy jiggy' experience was just that! I was under the age of consent and the 2 young ladies(2 mates from down the road) were only just old enough so I suppose it was really child abuse although I didn't feel that way back then. It happened about 8 times over a 6 month period and I can tell you it's not really fun in fact it's bloody hard work!! But it made me feel big in front of my mates.

my first ever penetrative sexual experience

...kinda euuwww dude

Sorry 😳

fixed it for you 😆

There is really something I don't like about the word 'penetrative'. yuk.

Rachel - that was not my intention!! But seeing as all the blokes on here are quite clearly closet pervs you are probably right 😆

quite clearly closet pervs

closet perv?

Yeah right, like i could ever hide in the closet with my heavy breathing.

Infidelity is a deal breaker - once the trust has gone its, well, GONE. It NEVER comes back.

Still..

[img] [/img]

Ok, well it's too late for me' to edit so I'll re-phrase:

Seeing as most of the men on here are clearly raging pervs..... Happy 🙂

No raging here either.

That happens after midnight once most people are safely tucked up in bed.

oh that's ok then. You really ought to work on the heavy breathing BTW.... you'd get away with much more if you weren't heard 😉

No one else can or should judge any other, someone elses experience is of no use in making your own decisions ......... no matter how similar.

emma82 - Member

Seeing as most [s]of the[/s] men [s]on here [/s]are clearly raging pervs..... Happy

As Steve had to explain in Coupling when pressed as to his collection of videos (they were about a 'lesbian film-making collective, who had to make videos of lesbians, and the one who made the best video was able to spank the others' (or similar) ): men love seeing women's front bottoms. Anything that multiplies the number of front bottoms men can see is a Good Thing.
Similarly, men like seeing women's frontal areas. Again, anything that increases the number of specific frontal areas available for viewing is a Good Thing.
Now whether this is one of those things better left to imagine than act upon is for more knowledgeable people than me to comment. Back to the OP, I guess it's a question of how serious your mate is about the relationship. If he's all mature and grown up and sensible, it's time to bin the bint. If he's still got a more 'go out and get it' attitude to life and can handle the possible insecurity issues, then forgive her.

(RepacK - Member Infidelity is a deal breaker -) words of wisdom 😉

😯

Yes, several boyfriends have been unfaithful to me over the years. Two I didn't know about until after we had broken up. One I knew about but turned a blind eye because he was young, had had a tough time with his parents, was insecure. I made excuses for him because I loved him. He did it again and I dumped him.

To me it doesn't matter which gender the third party is/was, or even the fact of the sex itself, it's the lies. When your partner is talking to you and you're thinking "I have no idea if you're lying to me or not", trust gone.

Funny, over the years it has always been the psycho jealous possessive ones who have been unfaithful. All the shouting and screaming that I was playing away from home (I was not) and there they were, at it themselves! You gotta laugh, eh?

Unfortunately, I have a feeling you're right, Karin!!

Rachel

Funny, over the years it has always been the psycho jealous possessive ones who have been unfaithful. All the shouting and screaming that I was playing away from home (I was not) and there they were, at it themselves! You gotta laugh, eh?

And this is a surprise????

My experiences and opinions are pretty straightforward. It doesn't matter whether it's a male or female involved in the infidelity and if it happens once it will happen again.

Well, yes, it was a surprise because I used to think that if someone was decrying something so vehemently then they must hate it and not be doing it themselves.

Ahhh, bless, how naive!

Maybe they believe accusing their partner of doing something absolves them of responsibility of having done it themselves...

(edited out the worst of the terrible English grammar)

It's funny how no one has bought up what actually constitutes cheating, as I know several people who have a wildly different point of view to mine.

Rachel, yes, I see that, if they can imagine that you are doing the same, perhaps they feel less guilty. Perhaps too it's because they know how they think (that it's ok to be unfaithful), and assume other people are the same.

Yossarian, agree, if they have done it once, they are likely to do it again.