[Closed] Aaaaawwww, bless! Poor little poppets...

Hear hear.

I think what I find most disconcerting about this thread is Mr Poppits obvious delight in children's unhappiness.

What a tosser.

Take it the OP doesn't have kids?

I think what I find most disconcerting about this thread is Mr Poppits obvious delight in children's unhappiness.

What a tosser.

Again, was that [i]really[/i] his motivation for posting the story?? It was all over the front of the shitty tabloids this morning, was that their motivation too?
WTF has not having kids got to do with it? I've got a kid and thought it was bloody funny. Unlike some posters on here.

Thing is though Dez, it wasn't your kids geting upset was it?

Especially as chimneys are far too small to admit a fat bloke. And we don't even have one. And why does his handwriting look just like my mum's?

[i]Thing is though Dez, it wasn't your kids geting upset was it?[/i]

Ah,I get it. So you're blaming Woppit for posting this thread - kids will read it and find out the truth. Either that or it was [i]your[/i] kids we're laughing at. Oh don't fickin know. Told you I was thick.

Thanks OP. You've ruined Christmas for me.
You could have put *spoiler* in the thread title.
Is it confirmed then? There definitely is no Santa?
😥

So chimneys pose no problem to him, thank *g*od

Why doesn't he leave it in a wheelie bin or in the back garden like the Yodel man? Would be a lot faster.

Again, was that really his motivation for posting the story?? It was all over the front of the shitty tabloids this morning, was that their motivation too?
WTF has not having kids got to do with it? I've got a kid and thought it was bloody funny. Unlike some posters on here.

Well, the fact that he posted about a dozen smileys right at the start would suggest to me that he finds the kids unhappiness amusing??

Jonv - that was the best evocation of the meaning of Christmas ive ever read.
may i borrow that please?

Of course, but like I said, I 'nicked' it from something my wife read to me. So to be fair, here's the link to that piece which while the sentiment is spot on, is overall imho a bit cloying and american, so feel free to paraphrase your own version too.

www.cozi.com/live-simply/truth-about-santa

yes. well paraphrased then Jonv.

As for Mr Woppit, I to missed the fact that he was trying to ruin christmas for all the children.

A funny story that I had seen elsewhere first. Not sure why the op is getting such a critical response. It is possible to care very much about children and still find humor in the things that upset them . Particularly in the inherent irony of this story. I see irony both in the way the representative of one belief system that hijacked the winter festival for its own ends accidentally blows the gaff on another childish belief system, and in the way parents have overreacted and jumped on the outrage bus.

The Woppit bashing is a bit ironic really, people not liking someone's view that doesn't tally with their own tenuous grasp on reality having a go......religious tolerance, bit of an oxymoron really.

Some of the other sentiments expressed e.g. jonv are much more insightful, thank you.

In the meantime treating religions as somehow special and deserving of special treatment moved a step closer to being a thing of the past in this country with the ridiculous row in Bradford between Muslims and Sikhs as to whose dietary quirks are more important and many mainstream religionists getting upset because the church of scientology is now officially a religion and will qualify for tax breaks and everyone knows that is a made up religion 🙄 Fine line to walk there.

Anyho happy wintervall.

Can we just clear something up? Knowing Santa is make believe does not in any way ruin Christmas for kids.

just like to use this opportunity to say woppit, you're a ****.

Thanks, barns. You [i]could[/i] just forgive me, though eh?

Happy Solstice.

Can we just clear something up? Knowing Santa is make believe does not in any way ruin Christmas for kids.

True, but allowing the younger ones to believe until they're old enough to understand who 'he' really is, instead of having their belief and wide-eyed joy in the myth of Santa smashed in front of them - is that so harmful? Is that the world we want for our kids, because if so I'm even more depressed.

It doesn't take much to push all the money and commerce aside and enjoy all that Christmas really means. If you have kids of the right age, just pause and look and listen to them at this time. They'll give you the answer about what Christmas is about. Those without, or who don't want to play along, don't ruin it for those of us that do.

Well, seeing as (a) I've got bigger things to worry about than the over inflated opinions of a bitter twisted individual who uses any excuse he can to pour scorn on anyone who doesn't agree on his world view, (b) I don't spend as much time on here as I used to, and (c) I could do with the inevitable enforced rest, I'd just like to use this opportunity to say woppit, you're a *. Happy Christmas!

Agreed. Woppit you really are a miserable *.

My lad will grow up with the local incarnation of Father Christmas, [url= http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Olentzero ]Olentzero[/url], and will probably be glad to find out he's not real as he's not quite as cuddly as the Coca Cola version.

in Berastegi if the children did not want to go to bed, a sickle would be thrown down the chimney and the children told that Olentzero would come to cut their throats if they didn't go to bed.

in Larraun he was called Ononzaro and said to have three eyes and usually depicted as a drunkard dressed like a scarecrow.

Can we just clear something up? Knowing Santa is make believe does not in any way ruin Christmas for kids

Knowing Santa isn't real may not ruin Christmas, but may create an adult who is the metaphoric equivalent of a physics text book as apposed to a classic novel..

Regardless of Mr W's motives, it is the irony of a vicar commenting on the non-existence of Santa that makes me smile...

The attitude of some of the religionists is quite telling though - probably best not to feed the troll 🙂

Anyway I'm off to the village Christmas Fayre where curiously both Santa and little baby Jesus seem to be co-'existing' happily...

Children do not believe everything adults say and enjoy a world where fantasy and reality coexist . Lots of their stories and games include things that adults cannot see and do not believe in . Having some older kid or vicar tell them Santa does not exist is not going to ruin things they have the proof of his existence every year. I can recall from as soon as I was old enough to play out and talk kids virtually tripping over themselves to break the news. I still had a belief especially since I never got a present off my eldest brother but always got one with a signed tag from Santa.

Agreed. Woppit you really are a miserable ****.

I'm not sure he's miserable actually. Spiteful perhaps. Unable to empathise with others maybe. Desperate for attention and self amused definitely. The thread title is deliberately provocative but as usual there's nothing surprising, original or thought provoking from the OP, simply an egocentric digest on the same old dogma. As I mentioned earlier, all zealots are boring and on the subject of religion, unfortunately, Mr Woppit is no exception.

[s]he is going to be gutted we are all discussing him [/s]

You made christmas for him and he is rejoicing 😉

[img] [/img]

[url= http://www.buzzfeed.com/briangalindo/21-vintage-postcards-of-krampus-that-will-haunt-your-dreams ]see more vintage postcards of Krampus here[/url]

I love childrens imagination and think they should be left to enjoy it as much as they like

Hang on. If you ate presenting Santa as fact then it's nothing to do with imagination is it? It's not make believe any more.

I love fantastic stories and so do my kids, but we don't have to think they are real. Would be a little weird if we did tbh.

Wow. And I'M the bad guy?

I don't believe in Mr Woppot

It doesn't take much to push all the money and commerce aside and enjoy all that Christmas really means. If you have kids of the right age, just pause and look and listen to them at this time. They'll give you the answer about what Christmas is about

Hang on a minute. Kids love Santa because they get presents from him. So how can you appreciate Santa without thinking about gifts?

That's not to say that the gift giving is bad or materialistic though. It needn't be if you do it right.

Anyway crankboy has it right. Fantasy and reality are pretty blurred for kids. Who cares if Santa's real or not? That is how the game is played in our house. It's done with a wink and a smile not with actual deceit.

[quote=molgrips said]Anyway crankboy has it right. Fantasy and reality are pretty blurred for kids. Who cares if Santa's real or not? That is how the game is played in our house. It's done with a wink and a smile not with actual deceit.

Ah - so you don't actually tell them that Santa brings them presents, and get them to write letters to him then? Or is that not deceit?

I told them Santa brings gifts, yes, but I won't be going to great lengths to maintain it as fact like some people seem to, and I think she already knows it's a game. I don't want her to be crushed if someone tells her it's not real.

Mr Woppit - Member
Wow. And I'M the bad guy?
POSTED 5 HOURS AGO # REPORT-POST

Fame at last

Nicked off the interweb
.
1) No known species of reindeer can fly. BUT there are 300,000 species of living organisms yet to be classified, and while most of these are insects and germs, this does not COMPLETELY rule out flying reindeer which only Santa has ever seen.

2) There are 2 billion children (persons under 18) in the world. BUT since Santa doesn't (appear) to handle most Muslim, Hindu, and Buddhist children, that reduces the workload to 15% of the total - 378 million according to Population Reference Bureau. At an average (census) rate of 3.5 children per household, that's 91.8 million homes. One presumes there's at least one good child in each.

3) Santa has 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 822.6 visits per second. This is to say that for each Christian household with good children, Santa has 1/1000th of a second to park, hop out of the sleigh, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left, get back up the chimney, get back into the sleigh and move on to the next house.

Assuming that each of these 91.8 million stops are evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false but for the purposes of our calculations we will accept), we are now talking about .78 miles per household, a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles, not counting stops to do what most of us must do at least once every 31 hours, plus feeding and etc.

This means that Santa's sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second, 3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man- made vehicle on earth, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second - a conventional reindeer can run, tops, 15 miles per hour.

4) The payload on the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium-sized lego set (2 pounds), the sleigh is carrying 321,300 tons, not counting Santa, who is invariably described as overweight. On land, conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that "flying reindeer" (see point #1) could pull TEN TIMES the normal amount, we cannot do the job with eight, or even nine. We need 214,200 reindeer. This increases the payload - not even counting the weight of the sleigh - to 353,430 tons. Again, for comparison, this is four times the weight of the cruise ship Queen Elizabeth II.

5) 353,000 tons traveling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance - this will heat the reindeer up in the same fashion as a spacecraft reentering the earth's atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer will absorb 14.3 QUINTILLION joules of energy. Per second. Each. In short, they will burst into flame almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them, and create deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team will be vaporized within 4.26 thousandths of a second. Santa, meanwhile, will be subjected to acceleration forces 17,500.06 times greater than gravity. A 250-pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of his sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force.

In conclusion - If Santa ever DID deliver presents on Christmas Eve, he's dead now.

Please do not tell your kids about this as they will inevitably shoot holes in these calculations and make a fool out of you.

I think this rings pretty true:

No known species of reindeer can fly.

I have, however, seen a horse fly. So I'm not ruling reindeer out just yet. And the 1/1000ths of a sec to visit each house would explain why I never saw him as a child, he was just too quick.

Since when does posting an amusing titbit from the papers get such a hostile response? Am I missing some sort of context that justifies all the vitriol on this thread?

Well, I have my suspicions, by I don't want to risk...

[img] [/img]

[i]Since when does posting an amusing titbit from the papers get such a hostile response?[/i]

I gave up trying to work that out!

a total trip of 75-1/2 million miles

I'd like to see their working for that. You could assume averate population density for Western countries, evenly distributed, but you'd also have to pick the shortest route through the grid..

Since when does posting an amusing titbit from the papers get such a hostile response?

When you've upset the church of scientology or some other similar fanatic group.....

(You could just forgive me),don't be silly christianity isn't about forgiving 😆

andrewh, you've overlooked one important piece of information that [s]reindeers[/s]renders your calculations worthless and that is that Santa's technical staff are able to send him through time portals thus effectively making time stand still for as long as it takes to complete the task right down to digesting the last mincepie crumb 8)