When you read the thread title, who did you think it would be?
Well, you are wrong. It's me.
I've entered the Relentless 24 hour race next year, having 'supported' friends last year and been inspired by their efforts, thinking it will be a great goal and will get me fit. I've started training, joined a gym, even got some support from my local bike shop. All is going well.
Last night (Friday) I got a call at 7pm (as I was waiting to go in to my works Xmas do) from an unknown number, I answered but the line was terrible so said I couldn't hear them, could they call back another time. Phone goes again, same response. Phone goes again but line is better. It's (didn't catch name) from no fuss events, and he's thanking me for entering, asking if I've ever done anything like this before (nope, only 3 enduro races, only one of which I've finished, roots and rain will confirm this) the conversation then takes a different turn. Again the phone line isn't great but basically someone has accused me of doping, and would I be willing to go for a drugs test. Their nearest place to me (Leeds) is a private clinic in ripponden.
My gast has been well and truly flabbered. I'm currently considering 3 possibilities.
1. It's a mate doing a prank phone call, if so it was very convincing, the chap was very apologetic about the time he was calling, but still very insistant I go for the test. Ha ha...
2. Someone has phoned no fuss for a prank. If this is the case then they are a ******* idiot for wasting everyone's time.
3. It's genuine, and no fuss are right to investigate. The chap was saying it could be a rival playing games? Flattering to think anyone thinks I'm any threat to anything other than last place.... is that kind of thing normal in these circles?
So assuming this is genuine, that raises a question or two.
Who has done it and on what evidence? I'm not exactly a regular on the race scene, so it's not like my results have taken a sudden spike, rarely even post rides on strava etc...
What are they testing for? I'm on quite a lot of medication (I'm type one diabetic, with issues) but that's all prescribed, but I've no idea if I'm unwittingly taking stuff that's not allowed and don't want to be banned for taking cough mixture etc.
Who pays for the test? If I have to I will, but seems a little unfair?
I should also clarify I absolutely am not taking any performance enhancing drugs... (and don't intend on using my ebike for the race, in case you were wondering). I play by the rules to the letter.
Any help advice appreciated.
Well this should be an interesting thread!
Of course it is a prank.
Why would they test you now?
Really?
Did you contact No Fuss via the details on their website to confirm?
You should be OK if you drink plenty of water and lay off the gear from now, from what I've read.
You get a call saying you've been doping shortly before work Xmas do?
OK......
Anybody at work know you enter such events??
EDIT and just in case you are taking this seriously, it's ukad that would be getting in touch with you not an event organiser from what I understand.
I'm type one diabetic
could someone have seen you injecting yourself at an event ?
Are you a British Cycling member? It might be worth phoning their Compliance Officer on Monday and asking them to establish if it is legitimate.
Mountain biker that isn't high on something would be surprising 😀
Top pranking!
Or if not...you'd better attend, I guess,
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Yep - do they want to see you in your pants an' ting ?Top pranking!
Hook ,line & sinker.
Quality gag. Fair play work colleagues.
I should also clarify I absolutely am not taking any performance enhancing drugs... (and don't intend on using my ebike for the race, in case you were wondering). I play by the rules to the letter.
Just because what you are taking is prescribed doesn't mean that it isn't on the banned substances list.
Top pranking!
Yep - do they want to see you in your pants an' ting ?
What you did there... I see it.
Scaredy wins teh interwebz for the night. And ting.
My reason for thinking it isn't a prank, is that at no point was there a 'punchline' or any reason to suspect it not to be genuine, the guy knew my new hometown (moved in 2 weeks ago) and the conversation was very specific, not generic 'yer mate you need to go for a drugs test cos you've dun drugz...' it was very non confrontational, almost apologetic for the inconvenience.
It may have been a ukad person that rang, garbled message didn't help, he asked about the no fuss event though so that stuck in my mind.
I've mailed NF, see what they say. I just think it's a very odd thing to prank about, especially as there was no pay off for the pranker?
Re work colleagues, I had arrived early, no one else was there, when I manage to have the conversation, I was round the back of a hotel
Mistaken identity?
Is there another Tom Howard, to whom this makes a whole load more sense?
Any drug tester is simply going to rock-up unannounced, no calls, nothing in advance - you been pranked 
If you do go then smoke a spliff beforehand to calm your nerves.
Is there another Tom Howard, to whom this makes a whole load more sense?
Perhaps this one?
http://www.giant-lincoln.co.uk/en-gb/aboutus/
Tom Howard
Politics graduate Tom is ready to offer help, technical support and assistance to anything cycling related. A road rider with a competitive edge, he can be seen riding in local and regional races, crits and TT’s. He also enjoys the social aspect of riding and will often be seen on our social rides chatting to customers. Tom’s greatest sporting achievement is winning a Sub-Series of the North Midlands Road Race League and finishing 3rd overall in his first year of competing and as a Junior.
😀
Ha, could be, though be a stretch to believe I lived in Leeds and worked in Lincoln?
Hi Tom what awful accusations ,I have three children who wont be getting what they want for Christmas , unless you could send money asap to 19-43-78 , 66778899 thank you!!
Oh that's awful, though bank transfer is very open to scamming, could I do Paypal gift instead?
well if you do get tested, you get to smash the roids as soon as the bloods n urine are taken 🙂
I think they just tie 'em off with a rubber band these dayssmash the roids
Cheers Tom Paypal gift would be great!!
I'll send over a bit extra so you can get some deodorant, stinky...
😀 Tom that hurts , i`ve ordered a cure!!
I seriously doubt, having been tested at events many times myself, that UKAD would ring you up and ask you to go for a test. They come to you, and generally unannounced, unless you're a pro and on the whereabouts program.
Just to be safe, I'd ring up BC on Monday morning and ask their stance on it, as a no show counts as a positive if it is genuine.
you can have 2 (sometimes even 3 😉 ) missed tests before they do owt anyway, can't you ?
unless you're Russian
[quote=smiththemainman ]Hi Tom what awful accusations ,I have three children who wont be getting what they want for Christmas , unless you could send money asap to 19-43-78 , 66778899 thank you!!
Would they like a power kite?
Would they like a power kite?
They're not African. So, no.
I wouldn't even bother BC with it unless you want to give them a laugh, from what's happened No Fuss don't organise drug testing, AFAIK the event isn't for points of any kind so not the place you would get tested and what were they doing calling you at 7pm on a Friday night for?
Did you get a reference number for the mythical test?
Just pop on Facebook that your off to be tested in the morning and upload some pics of a sample pot or 2 and see which mate bites first.
Most random thing ever.
Didn't think [i]Would you be willing to go for a drugs test[/i] somewhere in Yorkshire, at a mutually convenient time, was really the MO of drugs testers. Isn't it more like [i]piss in that bottle, now[/i]?
Our club tens have a drugs testing sign up so it's true the lowliest of recreational amateurs could find themselves tested. That's part of the whole time trial scene, though, which has rules and regs stretching back decades and is the grassroots of a major Olympic cycling discipline. Relentless doesn't seem to be quite the same thing.
aracer , that would be great and maybe a medium fatbike!!
But surely 'piss in that, now' would be a better prank? Even a prank phone call saying 'you've got an hour to get to a hospital to give a sample' would be better as it provides instant panic/surprise which everyone can laugh about 10mins later. Why go though the drawn out phonecall? This chap was talking about sending details out in the post! No one has asked me about it, made any reference to it or anything, which you'd think they would do if it was a prank? Is the purpose of a prank to confuse the shit out of someone quietly for a weekend?
Knowing the guys from No Fuss they don't have the resources for drugs tests, don't take riding bicycles around in circles too seriously and would probably just have a word with you and take you at your word unless someone had a photo of you going into Eufemiano Fuentes's office and leaving with a bag of blood.
You have been pranked. Probably boltonjon doing some elaborate anti ebike thing.
Sure, them showing up and demaning piss would have been awesome 🙂 As it stands, it's a bit average. 4/10 - much more effort required.tomhoward - MemberBut surely 'piss in that, now' would be a better prank? Even a prank phone call saying 'you've got an hour to get to a hospital to give a sample' would be better as it provides instant panic/surprise which everyone can laugh about 10mins later.
This chap was talking about sending details out in the post! No one has asked me about it, made any reference to it or anything, which you'd think they would do if it was a prank? Is the purpose of a prank to confuse the shit out of someone quietly for a weekend?
Ah the slow burn, now your confused, they have time to put a clever letter together and get you in for your "appointment"
Keep us updated then the documents arrive 🙂
Klunk - Membercould someone have seen you injecting yourself at an event ?
Frazer from No Fuss has seen me injecting myself at an event, and said "Anything I need to worry about?" "Nope" "OK cheers"
It's all very weird tbh
Just pop on Facebook that [s]your off to be tested in the morning and upload some pics of a sample pot or 2[/s] you've reported this to No Fuss Events and British Cycling who have taken this very seriously and have contacted the Police who are investigating it and see which mate bites first.
A mate did something similar to another mate who made a false (and very convincing) summons for speeding offences. He convinced the lad that he had attended court to appeal this and had instructed a barrister who now wanted paying. Tables well and truly turned.
So, frazer replied last night...
'Nope, wasn't us'
Right... *cracks knuckles*
I think a post on Facebook along the lines of what Bregante suggests is in order.
See who bites...
'So, after a particularly odd call on Friday evening from someone claiming to be from the organisers of the 24 hour event I'm doing, saying that I needed to go for a drugs test as someone had made an accusation that I'd been doping, I've spoken to the organisers, and subsequently the U.K. Anti doping agency, and they have confirmed it was a hoax. Good news for me. The bad news for the hoaxer is that UKADA, understandably, takes this sort of thing very seriously, as it reduces how seriously people take them when they actually try and bust genuine drug cheats, and are considering involving the police. If anyone has any info on who is responsible, let me know and I can pass the info on to them, to instruct the hoaxer of the fine they may be receiving....'
**Nick likes this**
munrobiker - Member
Knowing the guys from No Fuss they don't have the resources for drugs tests, don't take riding bicycles around in circles too seriously and would probably just have a word with you and take you at your word unless someone had a photo of you going into Eufemiano Fuentes's office and leaving with a bag of blood.You have been pranked. Probably boltonjon doing some elaborate anti ebike thin
guilty as charged 🙂
the people involved don,t have enough time to scratch there arse let alone start drug testing
this is the equivalent of drug testing at school sports day .its not a event or race that has any significance other than having fun .
I would ask yourself did I really fall for that -then ask did I really post that lol
Given my lack of racing (and the scene in general) experience and that relentless was the nationals last year and will be the worlds in 2018, so a bit more than a school sports day, I think I was justified to ask, yeah.
Just for future reference, Insulin IS a banned performance enhancing substance as it promotes muscle growth. Technically you do need a TUE for competitive racing. Not that I've applied for one either, as when I'm racing it's hardly competitively.