Fresh Goods Friday 292

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Well, you glorious slices of deliciousness, it’s another fecund and fabulous Friday, filled with fertile and forthright… um.. fings. Yes, it’s one of those weeks – sorry…

So what’s the shizzle for this week so far? What’s the saga? Whether you’ve been fighting fires, lifting lamps or grilling gammon, if you’re up for a bit of hot-to-trot two-wheeled action, then by jiminy SO ARE WE! So unpeel your attention from the counter of the preserved meats section at the supermarket and re-affix it Right Here, Right Now!

It’s Everyone’s Favourite – it’s FGF*!

*Fresh Goods Friday. No, not Freddie’s Ginger Flannel.

Canyon Nerve Al 7.0

Price: £1449.99

From: Canyon

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We’ve got a couple of Canyons in this week; first up is the Nerve, which is a unadulterated 120mm beastie. There’s an aluminium frame, and a host of commendable impressives for the sponds, including…

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…a full SLX drivetrain 10 speed drivetrain, apart from an XT rear mech and triple chainset. That’s a TRIPLE, people! Eeeh, I remember when I were a lad; everyone had triples, jumpers for goalposts etc etc.

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The Frame is the thing here, despite all the fancy widgetery strapped to it. It looks like a nicely-made number – welds are neat, present and correct and there are nice little touches here and there. There’s internal routing, everything’s well finished…

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…its looks are protected by helitape out of the box. Nice touch.

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Mavic Crossride FTS-X wheelset keeps the tyres round…

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and stopping is taken care of thanks to Shimano’s ever-dependable SLX brakes.

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Interesting textured saddle there, Canyon.

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And this is a truly hopeless spoke protector – fortunately it was very easy to remove…

Canyon Spectral Al 8.0 EX

Price: £2,849

From: Canyon

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This one is a 140mm do-it-all monster. Again, the Spectral has an aluminium frame, and is pretty similar in construction and design to the Nerve up there ^^.

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…but the stuff that’s bolted on to it is a bit different, natch. This one has a Cane Creek DB Inline…
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… X01 drivetrain componentry, Guide RS stoppers, a Reverb dropper and Canyon finishing kit. And if you don’t like the green and bronze colourscheme then you can also get it in silver and grey. Boom.

Sixth Element SE Wheelset

Price: £899 per pair of wheels

From: Sixth Element

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Carbon hoops hand-built in Manchester. These ones are comprised of Hope Pro4 hubs laced to etched carbon hookless rims with a 30mm width (24mm internal). Apparently that shade of green has been specially selected so it doesn’t clash with anything… this, as Hannah has pointed out, is something that Chipps will no doubt see as a challenge. We wait, and we wonder.

Exotic Wide Riser Bars

Price: £56.99

From: CarbonCycles.cc (they’ll be on the site soon)

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How wide is too wide? Let’s find out… here. we have some Exotic carbon riser bars of exceptional width – these ones, at a scant 210g (apparently) are a whopping 840mm wide. If that’s just too durned tooting much, you can also get them in more sedate widths such as 780, 800 and 820mm. James has clearly got his fingers stuck but he’s determined to pretend everything’s fine… but just wait until he tries to pick his nose.

Carbon Cycles cleats

Price: £6.79

From: CarbonCycles.cc

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Shimano compatible cleats of value. No, they’re not sexy, but by’eck, they’re useful. Unless you don’t use them, in which case they aren’t. As you were.

Truvativ BOO bar

Price: £60

From: Fisher Outdoor

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780mm gnarbar with special cutout bits at the end specifically so the special WTB grips fit. Speaking of which…

WTB Commander Pad Loc grips

Price: £22

From: Hotlines

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These are the grips to fit the bars, in case you’ve not been paying attention. They’re slightly squishier in the middle, and still have all of that non-rotational goodness (I’m paraphrasing, but that’s pretty much it). Nice purple, people. Not purple people; that’d be weird. Like oscillating ocelots.

Timber! Mountain Bike Bell

Price: $20 (or £19.99)

From: Timber – and now Cyclorise in the UK.
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Relax, people – THIS is a bell with a retractable clanger. Chipps brought one back from the recent Sea Otter and has been ringing his clanger at all and sundry. But then, he always did. The bell ting-a-lings like a regular bear bell (or Noddy hat bell if you’re Chipps) to give a polite warning to other trail users, but when you’re out on your own, you simply slide the thumb lever and the bell is silent. Stealthy.

Ninja.

It’s also the only quick release (via rubber O-rings) bell we’ve come across – if you have many commuting/towpath bikes that is. Bells are $20 with a hefty $15 international shipping fee, but they’re now being brought into the UK as of this week by Cyclorise.com. CLANG.

Mars and Snickers PROTEIN

Price: £2.19 ea

From: EVERYWHERE. Literally (metaphorically)

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Yup, it’s your favourite Mars or Snickers (Marathon) goodness, but now RAMMED WITH PROTEIN – a while 18 grammes of it in the Snickers (Marathon) and 19 in the Mars! According to the press release the ‘protein market is predicted to be worth £358million annually by 2018’. Given that it’s one of the basic necessities I’d say it’s worth a bit more than that, but I guess they’re specifically focussing down on the ‘energy bar segment’ or something. Whatever. It’s a MARS BAR RAMMED WITH PROTEIN and as such at least has to be treated with respect.

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Barney Marsh takes the word ‘career’ literally, veering wildly across the road of his life, as thoroughly in control as a goldfish on the dashboard of a motorhome. He’s been, with varying degrees of success, a scientist, teacher, shop assistant, binman and, for one memorable day, a hospital laundry worker. These days, he’s a dad, husband, guitarist, and writer, also with varying degrees of success. He sometimes takes photographs. Some of them are acceptable. Occasionally he rides bikes to cast the rest of his life into sharp relief. Or just to ride through puddles. Sometimes he writes about them. Bikes, not puddles. He is a writer of rongs, a stealer of souls and a polisher of turds. He isn’t nearly as clever or as funny as he thinks he is.

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