As above really, friend of mine has just got the keys to his first pub in Barnsley town centre, he owns a brewery so apart from the lager the beer is all sorted
So over to you to what else makes a good pub these days or where is your favourite pub and what makes it your favourite?
The customers
Clean, comfortable, good beer, nice food if it provides any if any music not too loud that's for bars.
Not being in Barnsley town centre.
Good Beer
No telly except for occasional important sports event
Quiet or no music
Dog biscuits / water bowl available free ( always goes down well)
Real fire in winter
No telly except for occasional important sports event
No telly then.
Dog biscuits / water bowl available free ( always goes down well)
You must drink in some rough pubs, I prefer beer and pork scratchings.
Real fire in winter
Ooh yeah good idea.
bouncy bar maids .good peer chat
at least three beers on handpour - a session ale, a tasty one and a porter/ stout
two lagers - one premium, one cooking
selection of bottled beers and lagers
the obligatory guinness
cider for the ladies
full stock of spirits
proper coffee machine
jagerbombs
.
peanuts
scratchings
bombay mix
wasabi peas
.
attractive staff
jukebox
Friendly and lively atmosphere.
Cheap shots.
Good music on the jukebox.
sniggers@Drac
Good staff is very important, bad staff that can kill a pub.
TandemJeremy - Member
Good Beer
No telly except for occasional important sports event
Quiet or no music
Dog biscuits / water bowl available free ( always goes down well)
Real fire in winter
Very much agreed. As long as "important" sports events does not involve soccer! 
This pretty much describes my fave pubs! Most notably, the Malet. Best pub in the world. FACT.
Racist chat.
Dog biscuits / water bowl available free ( always goes down well)
Dogs belong outdoors, not sniffing my crotch when I want a quiet beer.
amusing signs on the bathroom doors.
plus one for no dogs!
Chatty and friendly staff
Clean and unsmelly loos
Basic but good food - don't make it uncomfortable for drinkers to sit at a table (which seems to be happening increasingly)
Guest beers on a regular basis
Lock-ins
No **** dogs. I HATE dogs in pubs. Especially in wet weather.
This is Barnsley though - it's all rain and whippets up there right?
Good beer & single malt selection
Jukebox
No kids allowed
Real fire
A bar you can sit at
This is Barnsley though - it's all rain and whippets up there right?
Which pub? I'm from Barnsley.
The key to a successful pub is the licensee and spouse being in the bar 80% of the times it is open.
When they hand over to character-free and conversation-phobic bar staff for most of the time the atmosphere goes down the pan.
These days a pub needs to do something that will prise its customers from in front of the telly at home. All to many just don't make any effort.
For me - no music o quiet enough music to talk over at a sensible level. A good choice of real ales AND well-kept lagers too (too many pubs concentrate on one to the detriment of the other).
Ample, well designed seating (ie, no seats where you are constantly bumped by others trying to get by).
Clean toilets.
A sticky carpet and almost equally sticky seating (bolted down of course with lightweight aluminium ashtrays)
A Smokey atmosphere to freshen up the lingering smell of stale beer, urine and vomit
Disgusting toilets with a clean surface and straw dispenser in the ladies'.
Lipstick-smudged, plastic glasses filled with rank beer
A duke box with American Pie and Paranoid.
Plastic plants, a dart board and pool room
Short-changing, foul-smelling, alcoholic staff
A clientel made up of bikers, slutty students, dirty old men and women of disrepute.
Good selection of well kept beer
Friendly bar staff
Interesting pub interior (not just a big hall)
No dogs, kids jukebox, video games/gambling machines, TV
Large beer garden for summer
Home Made food, good service, lack of gentrification & good booze.
The Hourglass in Exeter is my fave pub currently. If only it had a beer garden, but then it would be the Double Locks of 1984-1999.
On the dogs point - I think we know from previous posts that I am no dog lover
However my local encourages dogs - but they have to be on a short lead in the pub - tiny pub as well - no issues for me.
Definitely agree about no really loud music.
Decent beer garden is always a winner
One of the things I look out for in pubs is a decent single malt selection - even if I'm not drinking it at the time I think it's a sign of a 'proper' pub
Nice ales on tap - WELL KEPT
Interesting lagers, ciders etc
Live music can be good but usually chilled stuff and again not crazily loud - jazzy or folky stuff is good (others might strongly disagree!)
Fire is a good shout too
Decent pool table
No dogs
No kids
Telly dedicated to sports
Busty serving wenches with some idea on how to pour a pint
Blokes behind the bar you'd happily have apint with
Interesting and eclectic decoration
Four or Five real ales, maybe 2 house ones
A wide range of malts
Some more busty wenches
Background music you can listen to if you're on your own but doesn't drown out the conversation when you're not
No drunks - jakies, winos whatever you want to call them
No happy hours
Did I mention busty serving wenches?
I'm in favour of well behaved dogs and kids being allowed in.
decent lager either on tap or in the fridge.
decent ales on rotation.
Bar snacks
if they are doing food do it properly. have a selection of condiments
veggie option. flexibility. "that doesn't come with chips"
no 'roasts only' on a sunday. if i only get to eat out once a week i don't want a roast forced on me becasue it is the 7th day of the week.
no snooty **** staff who turn their nose up cos you are a bit muddy from a ride.
comfy chairs
good beer
barkeeps of ample bosom (ideally women, but I'm open minded)
no sodding football on the telly.
no telly.
2 volume settings on the jukebox: 'quiet' and 'off'
lots of lovely beer.
lots of seating.
no dickheads.
all of which is probably very unprofitable...
Dogs, fire, good beer/ale and proper cider and in the middle of nowhere
Are there many middle aged, grumpy, dogphobic, kidphobic, workshy IT 'professionals' in Barnsley town centre? If not you might be asking in the wrong place!
EDIT - I missed off titobsessed
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