Why do horrible chavvy parents these days insist on naming their horrible chavvy children ridiculous names. Who would want their daughter called Lacey or a son called Jaden FFS…?!!

Where do these names come from? I can’t recall any Queen Lacey’s in our history…

Couldn’t agree more Loddrik.
(exception being if you had two girls, Cagney and Lacey would be perfectly acceptable 🙂 )

bless you for being so grumpy over something so silly, have you thought about having a nice cup of herbal tea and maybe doing some breathing exercises to keep calm. It can’t be good for a man of your age.

I think the trend nowadays is to name them after your mums fave video game character

Mr Ryu Donkey Sonic Nutt

What business is it of yours what people call their children? Don’t be such a snob.

I hadn’t realised that chav was still the lower middle class IT manager’s term for all those considered “below” him.
I haven’t heard anyone actually say that term for several years.

It’s just in case they win the poor persons tax (lottery).
so they’ll be ready to fit right in with celebs 😉

You see this thread would be even funnier if Loddrik was your real name. Please tell me it is, go on, please…..

I think the whole naming your children thing takes place in some kind of alternative universe for most parents. It’s as if there is some sort of temporary suspension of common sense, maybe it’s the hormones, I don’t know.

All I do know is that when we were expecting Ethan, for a brief period, I was absolutely convinced that ‘Willoughby’ was a great name for a boy and no amount of convulsive horror expressed by friends or family could shake my faith in that fact.

I haven’t got the faintest, freakin idea what leave I took of my senses, but I am glad that I came round before we came to sit down in the registry office and declare him as Ethan James, rather than Willoughby James.

My wife happened to mention a girl that she’d dealt with at school, her name was……

….Alice Cooper! I ‘proper LOLed’!!

In my teaching career I’ve also had the pleasure of knowing:

Fred Perry
Michael Caine
Michael Jackson
Jack Nicholson

i have a customer called david david.

Jaden is an old name.

The name Jaden is a baby boy name. The name Jaden comes from the Hebrew origin. In Hebrew The meaning of the name Jaden is: Jehovah has heard. A Biblical name.

For sheer (lack of) class you can’t beat Cantona. It sounds best when shouted in ASDA.

Cantona, put that Tia Maria back on the ####ing shelf

We gave my son an unusual name. Call us chavs and we’ll come round and stick a petrol bomb through your letterbox.

If i had a daughter I’d call her Clamydia. Sounds right posh. Not sure what it means, probably foreign or sommit. Our two pet Staffs are called Ronnie and Reggie.

This thread is now about terrorism.

Can someoene post a picture of Lacey Turner for me?

Thanks,

TSY

I Google Image searched Lacey Turner. No idea who they are but there seems to be 3 of them. Which one did you want?

The naughty cockney one off of Eastenders.

my youngest son is called Beech

when he’s older i’ll send him round to rob your house and rape your cat

Knew a family who called their daughter Princess Tiami. Apparently following the lead of some Z lister. There’s also a Pocahontas McGinty in Govan. It’s a pure sin furra wean so it is.

When considering a name for your newborn. Simply use the “tea” test. If the chosen name fits neatly in to “Haw (insert name; Charlene/Queen Lafita etc), come in and get yer tea”, when shouted from an upstairs windae, then don’t use it.

my children will be called “come here” and “go away”, doesn’t matter what sex they are.

actually i might suggest “winty Mac” then the poor sods name will be “Winty Mac Winterbottom”…. oh the fun they’ll have in school

yossarian – Member

my youngest son is called Beech

When he’s older, he might provide you with a grandson… A Son Of A Beech.

(IGMC)

Came across a good one yesterday, Zsuzsanna. That’s just adding random letters for the sake of it to try and look unique! It’s just paving the way for a lifetime of repeating “No, ‘Z’ for zulu… etc” to incredulous call centre staff.

I had this conversation with an acquaintance that called her child “Daisey”. What is the put on the extra E???

Can someoene post a picture of Lacey Turner for me?

There you go:

YAY! I love that girl. Would a rose by any other name be quite so hot!

Met her on holiday last year, and instantly said to my then girlfriend…

‘we should have one of those celebs that it’s acceptable for us to cheat with’

We split up shortly after the holiday.

She’s my second favourite on UK TV after the lovely Jennifer Metcalfe in Hollyoaks!

We are choosing baby names at the mo for our impending arrival and some of the websites are full of stupid names. Most of the sites are American and they are known for stupid names so the chavs come along and look at these sites and thats that, Chardonnay leona princess talulla smith is created.

krystahl shandelleah is a good girls name.

OI Formica! leave little Le-A alone. Cricklewood stop fighting NOW!

Zsuzsanna – quite common in eastern Europe as a non-made-up non-weird name. You should spend more time outside your ghetto.

Watching my Godson (9 years old) playing football the other week and heard a parent shout

‘For F*ck Sake Ronaldo, if you are going to fall over at least do it properly!’

I turned around to see a little ginger haired kid getting up off the ground.

My wife was at school with an Everhard (think thats the spelling) – his surname was Dick.

And his sister was Afelia…

Freakanomics had a chapter on the naming conventions of ‘lower’ America:

http://freakonomicsbook.com/freakonomics/chapter-excerpts/chapter-6/

There’s a Latoya at my college. Which isn’t so bad but the story goes that one of her lecturers called her Toyota. Poor girl , it sort of stuck.

It’s hard not to laugh.

In my time working with kids, I’ve met a Chardonnay & a Stella, colleagues & I assumed it was the alcohol that had been involved at the moment of conception. Not exclusively but quite often younger parents/younger parent.

Also come across lots of “phonetic” spellings of more traditional names, for example Shevaun.

Good job Mrs MFL & I didn’t follow that lead, otherwise Josh would have been known as Vodka Red Bull.

I went to school with Phil McCavity and Ivor Biggun.

Edit. I didn’t really.

My two favourite names (after Lacey Turner) that are seemingly innocent until you abbreviate the christian name..

Michael Hunt.
Jennifer Taylor.

Much like downsheps tea test I decided you’ve got to go for a name you don’t mind shouting in your own (and the local one if you didn’t grow up where you live) accent across morrisons – or indeed asda

Cantona, put that Tia Maria back on the ####ing shelf

I really hope it was in a strong manc accent 🙂

Edit: and for goodness sakes make sure it doesnt sound ridiculous with your surname too.

Josh

Biblical names are what do it for me. Hate ’em. Obviously a late 20th/early 21st century name fashion victim. I predict free schools all over the country full of Jacobs, Noahs, Joshs, Aarons, Isaacs etc in a generation’s time. Roll call will sound like someone’s reading the bible.

I had to create a user account the other day for Dongdong Smith. I can only assume that’s come from marriage, but what a great combination.

used to work with “Cherry-Pie Peters”

she was lovely 🙂

I know someone who has the joy of shouting britney, Paris, Chelsea come ere – she genuinely thinks they are classy names.

They do it so we can easily identify the lower classes – see also Tarquin, peregrine, Portia etc for the upper classes doing similiar
I once had to call and ask to speak to babar Bing

i have a customer called david david

I was once interviewed by Martin Martin