someone who breaks your shoes in for you, so you don't get cut-up achilleses and achey feet and end up at work with no shoes on.
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Chat Forum
jobs that SHOULD exist, but don't
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Posted 4 months ago #
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Tea Lady.
I know they used to exist, but I could really do with a decent cuppa right now, but I'm too lazy to get to the rubbish tea machine.
Posted 4 months ago # -
An inhouse cleaners. Someone who could whisk away my sodden, filthy cycling gear when I got into work, and arrive back at my desk with it clean, dry, toastily warmed up on a radiator, and smelling of pine forests, just before I'm due to set off home
The reality is going to be somewhat different
Posted 4 months ago # -
Professional forumite.
Posted 4 months ago # -
An under desk fluffer. A sort of physio or Yoga teacher who comes around offices but just gets to the point of what you'd like.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Curator of the Internet.
Posted 4 months ago # -
How much would you be prepared to pay for such a service Binners?
Posted 4 months ago # -
... ones with satisfaction?
Posted 4 months ago # -
someone who breaks your shoes in for you, so you don't get cut-up achilleses and achey feet and end up at work with no shoes on.
they are called German Squadies
Posted 4 months ago # -
stavromuller - given the somewhat unappealing prospect of climbing back into soggy lycra in 2 hours time - at this point in time, you could name your price
Posted 4 months ago # -
Email buffer that stops any silly or stupid email mistakes
Are you drunk sir?> lets you play on the internet while sloshed, but cuts out any stupid purchaces you will regret the next day.
A walker - who walks in front of you in busy public streets, clearing the rif-raf out of the way & deals with cuggers for you!
I could go on.......
Posted 4 months ago # -
I melted a pair of gloves once using a hair drier to dry them out.
Not sure whether wet gloves is worse than no gloves.
Maybe you should ride home in the buff.Posted 4 months ago # -
Email buffer that stops any silly or stupid email mistakes
Are you drunk sir?> lets you play on the internet while sloshed, but cuts out any stupid purchaces you will regret the next day.
These both exist as Chrome browser extensions, I'm sure.
Posted 4 months ago # -
binners - Member
An inhouse cleaners. Someone who could whisk away my sodden, filthy cycling gear when I got into work, and arrive back at my desk with it clean, dry, toastily warmed up on a radiator, and smelling of pine forests, just before I'm due to set off home
The reality is going to be somewhat different
*ahem* I believe you have one of these already just not in work.....
Posted 4 months ago # -
A walker - who walks in front of you in busy public streets, clearing the rif-raf out of the way & deals with cuggers for you!
cheap charity shop suit and a name badge from the mormon church renders everyone incapabable of making eye contact with you or coming near youPosted 4 months ago # -
Emergency dad service.
A subscription based service, where a quick call sends a man in a nice sweater (who drives an estate car) to any location to sort out your problems. Covering basic first aid, common sense DIY, plumbing emergencies, the "I've just bought something big and can't get it in my mini" moments, lifts home at 4am.
We could also provide mums to fulfil similar roles but with more enthusiasm and cups of tea.
Posted 4 months ago # -
bagpuss - why don't you drive to binners work with a spare set of gear for him?
Posted 4 months ago # -
I did offer to go and collect him......
Posted 4 months ago # -
Big hitter
Posted 4 months ago # -
Shelter-Wallahs.
Looking out of the window, I fear my ride home will be most moist. As such, I would like to employ a group of shelter-wallahs to run in front of me, carrying a large windblock and waterproofed shelter so that I may ride in the dry and warm.
This will also require very fast working mop-wallahs to dry the road surface, of course.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Bagpuss - has he proposed to you yet?
Posted 4 months ago # -
You mean you don't have this facility already Flashy? I'm most disappointed. You're slacking old chap
And Bagpuss did indeed very kindly offer to come and get me. She's an angel.
EDIT: I haven't as yet Yeti. But I'm not about to get into that on an internet forum. No good would ever come of it
Posted 4 months ago # -
Binners, these are times of austerity, my dear old thing. I had to let my third under punkah-wallah go the other day. Don't even get me started on the loss of my grape peelers.....
Posted 4 months ago # -
I would like to be the person who rides our local bridleways to make sure they are still there, sort of like a security guard, in case anyone steals them. Obviously they would need to be checked regularly and this would mean riding my bike offroad every day. I could also inspect cafes to make sure their tea and cakes were up to the mark.
Yes, I would like that job
Posted 4 months ago # -
A mate of mine did just that.. all around Hampshire with a GPS and a singlespeed!
Posted 4 months ago # -
A walker - who walks in front of you in busy public streets, clearing the rif-raf out of the way & deals with cuggers for you!
Look above peoples heads, they move aside.
I would like a personal lottery winner person, to win the lottery for me once a year.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Look above peoples heads, they move aside.
don't read/ talk on your mobile phone - I will walk into you
Posted 4 months ago # -
You're all missing the obvious one. Singletrack drier. Uses mop, shovel, fan heater, supply of gravel as appropriate to make the singletrack you want to ride nice and fun ready for the next morning. Booking required by 8pm the night before.
Posted 4 months ago # -
I'd like a service that provides a Emsz-alike to go to all my dates with friends and goes to work while I have a kip. That would be awesome.
Really really didn't need to get up this morning
Posted 4 months ago # -
Singletrack drier.
A more specific role is needed at the deadly Cannock Chase Trails... the role being 'braking bump buffer out-ter'... as soon as the mere hint of a braking scratch appears the BBBO jumps into action to ensure safe trails for one and all.
Posted 4 months ago # -
"Cannock braking bump buffer out-ter"
No human exists with the necessary strength and skill
Posted 4 months ago # -
Tony Blair testicle kicker. To be paid by the hour.
Posted 4 months ago # -
No human exists with the necessary strength and skill
If anyone can do it DavidTaylforth can. All that dry stone walling and squirrel eating should stand him in good sted.
Posted 4 months ago # -
PJM1974, what's the rate?
Actually, no need. I'll do it free of charge, in my own time.
Posted 4 months ago # -
Karinofnine - you would need a horse for that surely?
Posted 4 months ago #
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