Our rear lawn is fubared, female dog pee, moss cos it’s shaded & my over exuberance of Weed & Feed have knackered it.
3 options come to mind.
Re-turf & look after it ‘properly’
Take it up & gravel the area. (be a nightmare in autumn when the leaves are dropping)
Pretendy grass.
Apart from saying ‘It looks shit’* what do you reckon?

* It can’t look any shitter than now.

I am considering it too. My back garden is mostly block paved but I have a big flowerbed / dirt area that I can’t be arsed to set myself up for cutting when the time could be better spent scratching my nuts or riding my bike.

Looks easy enough to lay, it looks green all the time which is a massive plus and it doesn’t look shit.

I like the idea of vacuuming it periodically and making my neighbours think I’m a little bit weirder than they currently do.

I don’t like the idea or having to pick cat shit out of it.

Our garden is very shaded and we have two dogs doing their business. When we moved in the sellers said they tried all sorts of grass, all of which failed. So they installed artificial and spent quite a bit on the drainage etc. We were dead against it at the beginning but after one winter we are completely sold. For dark and shady places its great, green all the time, leaves can be swept off, not affected by dog wee, dry when its raining. We’ve got a kids swing and there are no bald patches at all, its hard as nails. Only slight issue is when a mole wants to come to the surface…we have slight humps sometimes so I just hammer them back down from time to time. Might be worth spending a bit and getting good drainage put in if your garden is wet. Do it.

Might be worth spending a bit and getting good drainage put in if your garden is wet. Do it.

It doesn’t seem badly drained actually. In fact I think we have a massive soakaway ‘tank/chamber’ under the lawn!

Decent stuff looks great, but… It’s bad for your garden’s creepy crawlies because it takes away a load of habitat. Birds can’t come and get their 5 a day in worms.

Birds can’t come and get their 5 a day in worms.

That actually could be an issue, as a paid up member of the RSPB. 😕

Decent stuff looks great, but… It’s bad for your garden’s creepy crawlies because it takes away a load of habitat. Birds can’t come and get their 5 a day in worms

This was our issue but we are putting some rotting logs about for the bugs.

That actually could be an issue, as a paid up member of the RSPB.

Don’t worry – the ‘P’ in RSPB stands for ‘Prevention’. Install your plastic lawn and they’ll send you a ‘Good Deed Done’ sticker to put in your window 🙂

Neighbour has some, looks awful, not sure why either his lawn is (was?) only about 4mx4m and looked really nice before, certainly better than my dandelion/moss and dog piss brown patched affair.

Astroturfing is against the forum T&Cs…

20 years time folk will be looking back on it like all tasteless trends of years gone by. Plastic pink flamingo, crazy paving, screencast wall blocks* etc.
Walk past some on my way to the office, it has weeds growing through and all around the perimeter of it.

*we have some of these and they’re getting skipped as soon as we find funds to replace with cast iron or something

See what I mean?

I’ll have a pound of mince
Half a dozen cumberlands
And half a pound of oxtail

Your lawn looks better than mine essel. Mine is now 10% grass and 90% dandelion.

Op, Don’t do it. You would be better off with concrete slabs. 😛

Op, Don’t do it. You would be better off with concrete slabs.

What, & spoil the look of the Indian sandstone?

It’s not that bad. Get a scarifier over it, remove the old thatch. Add some suitable seed and feed. Job done once weather warms up.

esselgruntfuttock – Member

Op, Don’t do it. You would be better off with concrete slabs

What, & spoil the look of the Indian sandstone? [/quote]

You just have to more creative with where you relocate your Indian Sandstone then … 😆

My neighbour has it.
I can’t say I especially love the look but I have to admit that everytime I’m reluctantly dragging a lawnmower across mine instead of riding my bike in the sunshine I realise he’s a wise man.

You just have to more creative with where you relocate your Indian Sandstone then

Come on then clever shite, you come & do it!

We had nearly 100 square metres of the stuff on our lawn in February last year. We have 2 small kids (3 & 5) and it’s been amazing for us.

We had it done for the same reason you are considering it; moss, shade etc.

You can use it after rain without it being too slippery or creating mess in the house. It doesn’t need cutting. I’ve got the leaf blower out on it a few times and spent 10 mins total pulling the odd weed out of it over the year.

This week we had some guys come and trim the conifers but they used petrol trimmers which get hot when used and they put them down on the ‘grass’ which melted. They’re going to pay for it to be repaired but I say it now as a word of warning, it does have technical drawbacks.

Bloke down the road got his front lawn done and it looks really nice even after a couple of years. Only a small area and he paid for good quality ‘grass’ but it defo worked for him.

we’ve had ours down for a year now. not cheap at £2k but worth it. kids play on it 8 months a year rather than 2 months when the mud was dry and the moss had dried out…..
only maintenance is raking the leaves off it in autumn, the gravel off it every now and then and the pigeon poo off it in Spring.
it’s infinitely better than what was there before and looks like proper grass.

This is the stuff we have.

The only comment I’d add to what I’ve said above is that it’s like carpet so has a pile to it. Try to orientate it so whenever you look at it you are looking into the pile rather than onto the back of the pile and that would make it look a load better. As you get the different textures and colours. A friend had theirs done and imo they’ve had it laid the wrong way so it doesn’t look as good as it could.

@esselgruntfuttock, your lawn doesn’t look that bad. Personally I’m not a big fan of artificial stuff.

Call out Green Thumb or similar lawn treatment companies. They’ll soon sort it out for less than price of buying the treatments yourself. Our lawn looked much worse than yours and now looks great.

Apart from it doesn’t photosynthesise, neither does it allow daisies, clover, dandelions and other useful flora and fauna for pollination…

Oh, and it consumes other natural energy and resources to create it, whilst giving nothing back in return, it’s possibly not the most eco friendly of materials.

Apart from that and that it doesn’t require a petrol or electric lawnmower to keep it trimmed to within an inch, if it meets your own personal requirements, do it.