daft crap you hear in adverts

“Imagine if your hair felt as strong as you do” – as muttered by fat arse with a cheque book Lopez in some shampoo advert.

Really? Does anyone fall for this guff?? (Runs out to buy shampoo because telly told me to)

Relevant…

New and improved. I hate that. It can’t be both. Pick one.

shampoo and cosmetic adverts are full of double-speak. If the products really did do any of the things they want to claim they do then they wouldn’t be a cosmetic, they’d be a pharmaceutical and as such advertising them would heavily regulated. So you have to have phrases like ‘reduces the appearances of’ or ‘you told us that…..’

Same thing happens with food advertising, where you’ll be told that something is ‘an excellent source of antioxidants’ but you can’t say in the advert or on the packet what it is that antioxidants do for you if you eat them, if you can’t substantiate the claim.

Mind you look at all the bullshit we swallow about the nuances and personalities of different metal pipes

My luxuriant coffier is largely due to EPO.
If it’s good enough for Jan, it’s good enough for me.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2012/feb/10/cyclist-jan-ullrich-doping-hair

Evening Primrose Oil seems to have lots of benefits.

what about Alpecin caffeine shampoo “for men”. Eh? silly question, but why only for men? Does it smell of engine oil?

I clearly remember an advert on Capital Radio some years ago. ‘Eye tests while you wait’! How the hell else are you supposed to have eyes tested? Pop them out can come back in a couple of hours?!!???

anything that says anti- ageing in its description usually of creams for women

lubricating molybdenum disulfide is deposited, via electrical induction, into the billions of micropores on the surface of hard-anodized aluminum.

😛

“… You’re worth it …” 🙄

New and improved. I hate that. It can’t be both. Pick one.

Yes it can!
If I go buy a new car the same as my old one, there will be no improvement. If I buy a new car of a more recent model, then it’s new and improved. 🙂

piedi di formaggio – Member
I clearly remember an advert on Capital Radio some years ago. ‘Eye tests while you wait’! How the hell else are you supposed to have eyes tested? Pop them out can come back in a couple of hours?!!???

Just for you cheesy… years ago in birmingham there was a chiropodist with a billboard outside. On the billboard was a huge poster pointing with an arrow pointing to the front door and the slogan “Doctor Bigfoot. Chiropody While Wait”

There’s a cosmetics advert that says “Inspired by Gene Science”.

W.

T.

F?

Bifidus digestiva!!!!!

“Inspired by Gene Science”

who’s he when he’s at home?

100% of 72% of 125 people agreed

x fruit is a super fruit and has been shown to reduce cancer/lower cholesterol/kill aliens*

*you need to consume a metric tonne

Gene Science”

Gene Simmonds moonlighting using a false name, conducting experiments using his large tongue

I love the phrase “Digestive Transit”…….that’d be a McVities’ van then?

That Alpacin caffeine shampoo advert really annoys me, it doesn’t actually say why on earth your hair would want to be bathed in caffeine!

New and improved. I hate that

Moreover, all this time we’ve been using old and inferior.

The amount of times some products have boasted “improved,” how shit must they have been to start with?

They can’t say why you’d want to put caffine on your hair because you can’t make an unsubstanciated claim in and advert or on the packaging.

Where you can make unsubstanciated claims in in the guise of news and editorial (remarkably). So the real campaign will be through press releases to copy hungry news agencies and by sometimes having a paid patsey working as a journalist.

Thats how a lot of nutritionism is marketed – the fad for superfoods is driven through news stories that suppliment manufacturers plant with journalists which they happily print without checking. The health claims are made in the press and the adverts conveniently appear around them

The general conclusion I have reached is that either most women are thick or at least marketeers think they are. Most of the spurious shite is in adverts aimed at women: hair and cosmetics, diet foods and organised anorexia rings they all assume women are vapid fools with no understanding of science or statistics…

Bodyform ads where female viewers are instucted to “Have a happy period” still illicit a prompt “**** off!” from my missus…

Bodyform ads where female viewers are instucted to “Have a happy period” still illicit a prompt “**** off!” from my missus…

Probably time of the month, mate.

The general conclusion I have reached is that either most women are thick or at least marketeers think they are. Most of the spurious shite is in adverts aimed at women: hair and cosmetics, diet foods and organised anorexia rings they all assume women are vapid fools with no understanding of science or statistics…

Bodyform ads where female viewers are instucted to “Have a happy period” still illicit a prompt “**** off!” from my missus…

you just don’t notice the ads that are targeted at you

More shampoo nonsense,

Pentapeptides!

What?

The general conclusion I have reached is that either most women are thick or at least marketeers think they are.

I think advertisers realised a while back that women had equal capabilities to men, as this 1950s advert clearly implies

In fact some seemed to suggest that women were smarter…..

Anyone remember boswellox, it was the magic ingredient in one of the anti wrinkle creams a few years ago (L’Oreal Wrinkle De-Crease to be precise). I reckon some cynical marketing type just wondered how far they could go, judging by the fact it was on the telly for a while quite a long way.

Any advert that includes the phrase ‘up to’.

“This deodorant will make up to 1000 women want to sleep with you.”

“Up to 1000” clearly includes the number 0.

I mean, I bought some anyway. You can’t argue with the odds.

“This deodorant will make up to 1000 women want to sleep with you.”

Got to be worth a punt. What’s the deodorant called ?

Bifidus digestiva!!!!!

He has a fwend you know!

“thv3 – Member

Bifidus digestiva!!!!!”

Is that not a spell from Harry Potter?

Bifidus Actiregularis, Bifidus Digestivum, L. Casei Imunitass, Bifidus Activo, Digestivum Essensis, L. Casei Imunitass, L. Casei Defensis & variants are all registered to Danone and used in their Activa range of yoghurts.

Wonder if its related to marketis bulshi titis?

I never miss my tripple aha fruit acids at breakfast time. 🙄

Caffeine is an insecticide, that’s why the plant puts it in its seeds. Is the shampoo aimed at people with head lice or fleas?

Is the shampoo aimed at people with head lice or fleas?

What the advert can’t say too overtly is the shampoo is supposed to prevent / reverse male pattern baldness

Maybe I imagined it, but I think I just saw an advert for Skegness on C4!?