I’ve felt rough as owt for about five days. Bad tummy, lots of visits to the toilet. Not been sick but have felt nauseas. Waves of heat and sweats,low level headache, bad lower backache and general weakness.

Anyone else suffering?

You are pregnant.

Sounds like a dose of cat AIDS to me.

Would that be the good cat AIDS or the bad cat AIDS?

Bad. Definitely bad.

You’re going to die

can I have your bikes?

Flustula Clemeruns by the sound of it, I would say.

And a bad case. Probably the worst I’ve ever seen etc etc.

http://www.google.co.uk/#q=swine+flu&hl=en&prmd=imvnsul&source=lnms&tbm=nws&sa=X&ei=Gc40UK-UJIi5hAfozoCoBQ&sqi=2&ved=0CAoQ_AUoBA&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.r_qf.&fp=7d95a33ffafb6245&biw=853&bih=519&safe=active

It’s ok if it’s Cat AIDS, I’ve just found a cure. You need:

Worms. Stop eating dog poo.

Derek – I had that the week before last. Sickest I’ve been in many years and I didn’t leave the house for 7 days.

Viral. Nothing you can take for it but do your bet to stay hydrated. Keep to bland food and expect it to take a while to get back to normal. I’m still not right digestively 2 weeks later.