I’d like to think of myself as fairly polite and mild mannered most of the time. I try not to use bad language. I’ve never been in a fight.

But.

Whenever a driver does something I deem dangerous or stupid, instead of saying ‘Excuse me, I think that was rather dangerous. Please in future could you try to pay more attention/check your mirrors/give cyclists a bit more space/etc’, what actually comes out is ‘You ****ing ****head what the **** do you think you’re doing, learn to ****ing drive!’ A few seconds later the red mist clears and I feel a bit guilty and daft. Thus far I have avoided assaulting their vehicle but I’m worried it’s only a matter of time, and it’s going to get me into trouble.

Does everyone else manage to just tut, shake their head and get on with it? I ride quite defensively and am pretty good at predicting which taxi is going to try to kill me next, so actually I’m not often taken totally by surprise.

Off to have a cup of tea and listen to some whale music…

I’ve probably gone on about it far too much already this week but your very scenario currently has me on crutches, black and blue all over, a friction burn from my ankle to my knee with tyre rubber that won’t come out of the hole, a written off front bike wheel and carbon bars, a bill for the ambulance taking me to the hospital, a very pissed off (but still very nice) wife who is wondering how much more she can take (other domestic incidents and manic depression induced), nearly arrested for assault, a driver facing a dangerous driving charge (subject to CPS decision making) for deliberatley ramming me into a bus, a whole heap of people late for work and a traffic bobby having to spend a lot of time dealing with all this nonsense.
My one and only significant road rage incident. There won’t be another.

When folk get into cars they leave their manners behind. I also am mild of manner but whilst pushing mtbfixlette in her buggy this week some twonk drove through a puddle and soaked me (rain cover kept her safe). I used loud profane vocab to address the receding vehicle and would have put the boot in to their door given half a chance. Seething!

i am similar, i am getting better at controlling it.

It is worth remembering that if you call some one a c*** they stop listening.

If you tap on the window and politely say ‘you over took very close and in future it may be worth giving cyclists more room, I understand that from where you are it looked ok, but from my perspective it was scary. If you had just waited for the oncoming car to pass you would have had the whole road, given me more room and be no more delayed in your journey’

it may well just sink in.

I’d say with the shouting i had a 0% take up rate, with the being polite at least 50% are listening – thats got to be better

It is a natural reaction to nearly being killed but not very helpful

I try to laugh at them and ride away smiling at their inadequacies. It doesn’t always work but its better than seething for hours.

so ” got a driving licence? Off a cornflake packet was it?”

“hope yer next craps a pineapple”

Make the little penis sign

My fave for drivers that pull out from a side road then stop blocking you – scream loudly and don’t touch he brakes until the last possible second when a big slide or stoppie into the side of the car. gives them a nice fright. Get it right you can just about press your nose on their window

Then laugh in their face and ride away. its especially good for those who overtake you recklessly only to get caught in traffic a hundred yards up the road – as you pass them laugh obviously at them and cycle off into the distance

The key is to spoil their day more than yours. They are frustrated and angry, you are laughing

I used to get very worked up and aggressive. I now find waving and smiling at cars that lean on their horns at me to be much more worthwhile – doesn’t spoil my day and they go apoplectic with rage!

What an utter load of pish TJ.

“Fear Management” would be the more honest thread title. First steps first.

The key is to spoil their day more than yours.

Idiot.

I just offer them out first thing, and they generally zoom off thinking that guys a f**kin nutter! Don’t know what I’ll do when 6’4″ gladiator decides that yes he will take up my offer and gets out!

What an utter load of pish TJ.

+1

my favourite insult

“you drive like a teenager!”

The key is to spoil their day more than yours.

I’d agree with that.

What an utter load of pish TJ.

-1

The point is not to let it bother you.

They are all het up and angry hence the driving like a cock ( much of the time) hence smile and laugh at them and ride away.

You don’t get angry and upset and they have not had their anger validated by you getting angry with them. You are happy laughing at their inadequacies they remain frustrated in their car. You win.

its a much better way of dealing with it than getting nagry IMO

I think it’s more often a case of them being a bit thick and dopey, rather than angry.

I’m trying to confront my reaction the first few seconds after something happens. Obviously afterwards I can see what I should have done, but it is difficult to control the reflex of hurling a torrent of abuse.

Maybe I have Tourets 🙄

I like to make a point, reasonably, or just ignore it, sometimes a subtle head-shake can wind them up, but not really worth getting agitated about if you can avoid it.

These twunts aren’t going to take lessons from cyclists.

EDIT Actually taxi drivers do wind me up, some of them really take the piss.

It’s a fight or flight response, isn’t it? You’ve nearly been squashed, so your bodies adrenaline level has shot up, you will get angry & pissed off, the only time I didn’t get truly angry when I got knocked off my bike I let the guy go without details, and I’d wrecked some rigid forks.

Bearing in mind a couple of the recent threads, not sure if STW is the right place to discuss anger management

I used to have severe anger management issues around this one – I’d do all the usual shouting waving etc etc

But then I stepped back and thought about what I was actually achieving from doing it. Really. I wasn’t changing the attitude of the twonk that had just cut me up (often it just made them laugh all the more at you). It didn’t make me any safer, as I would then be wound up and more likely to let me concentration drop.

And so I made an effort to rise above it – easier said than done (particuarly true if you knew me!) and you know, I avoiding being so wound up, and I actually found that I had much fewer near misses as a result.

At the end of the day, you can only control what you can control. Ride aware and control your own safety. Doing that has made my cycling a lot less stressful and a lot safer and I say that as someone who commutes through London traffic on a daily basis.

You’re free to shout and rant and threaten all you want and but matter how justified you are in doing so, you’re not changing a thing.

Got knocked off my bike by acomplete idiot who tried to squeeze through as I was riding between the kerb and a traffic island. Nothing major, just skinned my knee and shin.
Total red mist moment, got back on and pedalled like a maniac after him. He got held up at some lights after 150 yards so had to sit there looking terrified when I pulled all the wipers off his car and threw them in the gutter, screaming profanities at him all the time.
GFelt a bit gulity after, but I’m sure he’ll think twice about doing the same manouvre.

Oh I keep meaning to open the NS passenger door though.

The old ‘open the back door of their car’ trick often appeals to me, though I’ve never tried it.

Ditto Cynic-al. Anyone tried it? What are the legalities of such an action?

some situations can only be resolved by violence. it’s the only way they’ll learn to stop risking people’s lives

I pushed the engine stop button on a bus that cut me up once, and opened the doors to have a go at the driver on another.

Haha, I’ve never thought about pushing the engine stop on a bus. Do the brakes also stop working when a bus engine dies?