I do not have a New Zealand password

“G’day” might work?

1. My great grandfather taught Fred Perry to play tennis.

2. My grandfather worked on Dr. No as an art director.

3. My father helped get Tim Peake into space.

An ex-girlfriend was the original Athena Tennis Poster girl.

I took Watergate burglar Gordon Liddy for his first curry.

I have no problem with going tubeless.

I like grime
I like hip hop
I like jazz

My Mum used to be Gary Glitter’s doctor.

I taught Steve Peat’s son to ride a mountain bike.

I can write equally well with both hands.

APF

I’ve been locked in Winson Green Prison by accident
I’ve been locked in Rainhill Mental Hospital by accident
I’ve been locked in Manchester Terminal 2 by accident

I am related to Rowan Atkinson
One of the Police Constables my Grandad was in charge of in North Riding went on to write Heartbeat
I have driven one of the Aston DBS’ used in Casino Royale

Oh go on, three more.

4) I’m credited on the DVD for the “Preaching to the Perverted” movie.

5) I’ve been on stage with Bill Owen (Compo from Last of the Summer Wine).

6) Another Twitter one, I taught Francis Maude how to use social media.

1. I have appeared in a Hollywood movie with Christian Slater.

2. I once got myself locked out a hotel, climbed a wall while wearing a suit in order to get back around to the front entrance, leaped down in front of a cabinet minister, who was so bemused he gave me a complete tour of parliament.

3. I have written a best selling book.

My Dad,his Dad and his Grandad were all lumberjacks.
My hands used to be insured for £850,000.
I saved a boy’s life.

– My battery fired the first artillery rounds of second Gulf War.
– I once crashed riding the “worlds most dangerous road” in Bolivia.
– I really enjoy working in insurance…

FFS ….. Let it go.

1. This thread is n’t very good
2. I c[b] an [/b]‘t be [b]arsed[/b]
3. I’m the Queen of iceland

I have been hoofed in the slats
I once went a whole month without pudding
I love cocaine and have dabbled with hookers

I once sharted during a presentation to a potential multi national client.
My Cousin used to be in Coronation Street
I’ve probably shagged your mum

Hmm, so what?

I’ve been to Hastings
and I’ve been to Brighton
I’ve been to Eastbourne too

Helped? It took more than one of you to pour some vodka into a can of pop? Hell, I’ve been doing that for years.

I find the Orange 5 aesthetically pleasing
I have a KOM at Mountain Mayhem from the first year it was at Gatcombe park
I can eat 18 slices of pizza at the Pizza Hut ‘all you can eat’ lunchtime buffet

Every holiday outside Europe I’ve been on has involved warfare or civil unrest
I’m faster than pro cyclist Jack Pullar of pedal heaven and can prove it
My Grandfather was sentenced to be hanged in Edinburgh Castle for dereliction of duty (or something) in WWII until his mortally wounded CO was found in a japanese prisoner of war camp and exonerated him on his deathbed

I helped write material to Richard Herring’s Hitler Moustache Tour.

I paid a university professor to improve an essay on my behalf.

I puked into a hedge at the same time as Prince Harry: both of us were Royally* pissed.

*geddit!