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Your summary of films you've never seen

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Live action musical movie adaptation of a song by the muppets.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:23 pm
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Brokeback mountain.

Two cowboys take it in turn to give each other piggy backs until one gets a touch of sciatica.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:33 pm
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Leon.

Biopic about a man who experiences remorse on not buying a golf.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:35 pm
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No country for old men.

Docudrama about Boris's healthcare strategy during Covid.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:36 pm
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Lord of the rings - a bunch of magical dwarves spend 3 hours wandering around looking for treasure. Now that I write it down, it sounds a bit like Stalker. I do quite like Stalker. Maybe I should give it a go.

Return of the Jedi - a load of magical koala bears and another magical dwarf who sometimes talks backwards.... Do you know what, I haven't got the first idea what happens in this film. I presume there's an epic quest, lots of FX and the good guys win out in the end?


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:37 pm
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Guardians of the Galaxy.

Story of two brave children determined to stop at nothing in order to preserve what is rightfully theirs. All in the face of an ogress father who has a cup of tea and a pang for something sweet.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:42 pm
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King Richard - Will Smith playing Will Smith in a Will Smith production of a Will Smith film.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:44 pm
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Escape to Victory - prisoners break out of Portsmouth jail and hide on Nelsons flagship.

Nuns on the Run - pundits wearing black and white habits discuss the latest cricket action

The Full Monty - feature length episode of Gardeners World


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:47 pm
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Gladiator

Black comedy about hero worship of a cannibalistic serial killer.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:48 pm
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Where's this like button we were promised?

Some of these are rather good....


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:50 pm
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Interstellar

Romcom about a man who struggles to express how he feels about premium Belgium lager.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:54 pm
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Heat

Fly on the wall documentary set in an Edinburgh office during the unbelievably hot summer of 2022 and their AC stops working.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 7:57 pm
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The Hunt for Red October - one man's quest to find a very specific calendar. Give me a month, one month only.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 8:00 pm
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2001: A space odyssey

Story of how best to use the Millennium Dome.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 8:03 pm
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Lost in translation

Musical about a young brummie guy working in Scotland and is introduced to the local delicacy of a pie in a roll.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 8:13 pm
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A Quantum of Solace - one man's research into just what is the right amount of me time after losing one of his hairy kiwis due to a temptress named after a wasp.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:06 pm
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Fight Club - can't really tell you. I don't make the rules.

Bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia - never seen this but I'm going to say the title's the spoiler.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:10 pm
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My Left Foot

...seen the rather predictably titled sequel? ("Seriously dude, where's my left foot")

Apollo 13 - talk about milking a franchise!

Spartacus - dunno. I've not seen Spartacus


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:14 pm
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Romancing the Stone

Things get a little steamy on the curling rink


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:18 pm
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We've got to talk about Kevin

Harry Enfield is interviewed about one of his comedy characters


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:33 pm
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Avatar

horny smurfs


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 9:36 pm
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E.T. - little dude gets bored trying to spell etcetera so gives up


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 10:17 pm
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Jack Reacher.
A tall guy gets a rifle off the highest rack for a short pilot.
This may be a cross over movie


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 10:22 pm
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Star Wars - Good guys and bad guys shoot each other with flashy special effects, then repeats into the future and back into the past ad nauseum

Jaws - Remake of the Monster from the Deep but naming a particular fish and leaving it with a whole heap of back story for fish specialists to refute every time there is a shark attack


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 10:31 pm
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The curious case of Benjamin Button - documentary about the life of Jenson's lesser known brother.

Hang 'em high - instructional video about the best laundry drying techniques.

Dude where's my car - crime watch reconstruction told from the victims view point.


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 10:51 pm
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Speed - I was going to watch this with Prof Heisenberg, but he couldn't work out where it was showing


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 11:04 pm
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Christine

Am I right thinking its basically 'Herbie Goes Bananas'?


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 11:05 pm
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Braveheart - chancing it on a bit of a 50:50 one


 
Posted : 30/08/2022 11:36 pm
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Live action musical movie adaptation of a song by the muppets<

This made me chuckle!


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:29 am
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'Cujo'

"Don't worry, he's just being friendly”


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 5:24 am
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The Godfather pt 2

Stale Rob Schneider 'comedy' vehicle in which he reprises his role as hapless authority figure to two streetwise 5th graders.

Costarring Kevin James.


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 7:52 am
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Demolition man

Wesley Snipes shares with us his love of bulldozers.


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:01 am
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Dirty Harry - man refuses to bathe for a week.
The Thing - Documentary about katie Price/ Hour long movie about an Orange Gravel bike


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:10 am
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Dances with wolves - Saturday night entertainment with a championship football team.


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:13 am
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Jurassic Park - pensioner looks for parking space in multistory

Muppet Christmas Carol - sing along at government Christmas party


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:13 am
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Elephant Man

Richard Ayoade is comically unprepared for his safari holiday


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:19 am
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Speed – I was going to watch this with Prof Heisenberg, but he couldn’t work out where it was showing

Very good!


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:23 am
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Shawshank Redemption:- Dyslexic Altar boy comes good.


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 8:56 am
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No superheroes and no children's book adaptations is my rule for film selection.

Oh and any Lord of the Rings. There's a battle...


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 11:37 am
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Memento. I think I have never seen it.


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 11:55 am
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Dirty Rotten Scoundrels - more live streaming from Parliament......


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:01 pm
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Rocky 1 - hour long film of Lake district MTB'ing.
Rocky 2 - sequel filmed in the highlands.
Rocky 3 - you get the idea.

50 shades of grey - worlds worst DIY centre.

Dangerous Liaisons - More Tory shenanigans on Clapham Common


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:07 pm
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One flew over the cuckoos nest - Her majesty visits downing street by helicopter


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:16 pm
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Nothing will ever beat Malcolm Tucker's description of Star Wars.

NSFW!


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:26 pm
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Speed – I was going to watch this with Prof Heisenberg, but he couldn’t work out where it was showing


 
Posted : 31/08/2022 12:49 pm
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