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Maximum wage, no more than ten times the minimum wage.
Is this power global?
Single global currency.
Ban currency & commodity speculation
Minimum hourly rate global.
Create new religion make it universal based on me of course.
Late edit. execute saxonrider for crimes against male fashion
Destroy all ebikes, then make Pooks floor level 😉
Make any slight driving offence against cyclists (this includes close passes, irritating left hooks, overtaking just before a queue/roundabout, generally being an impatient knob-end, talking in the office how cyclists shouldn't ride "during the rush hour" etcetcetc) punishable by cycling a BSO to work for 2 days a week for one month. I don't care how far it is, or what the weather is like. Offender gets to choose which days they ride.
That is too charitable, DezB.
Get rid of countries. We are one planet we are all, with a few exceptions like Nigel Farage and Donald Trump, humans. We need to stop all this competitive nationalistic bollocks and sort the whole world out
[i]That is too charitable, DezB[/i]
It's cuz I'm a nice leader 🙂
Send all people with beards to a remote island.
Would solve a lot of issues.
Declare war on the Isle of Mann and make all Olympic divers wear arm bands and a rubber in case they sink
Close the Friday Kylie thread. I never said I would be a benevolent ruler. 🙂
/Mark Thomas' line
Prevent anyone who practises Homeopathy from receiving conventional medical treatment, and force them to cure themselves using their sugar pills. Same applies to Faith healers etc.
Also lock up James Corden and force him to watch his own adverts 24/7 for etenity.
Edit: Also remove all health and safety warnings from products for ten years to sort out the gene pool.
[i]We need to stop all this competitive nationalistic bollocks and sort the whole world out[/i]
How shite would the World Cup be if there was only one team?
DezB - Member
We need to stop all this competitive nationalistic bollocks and sort the whole world outHow shite would the World Cup be if there was only one team?
Football's already been banned 
Force the previous world leaders into forming a musical theatre troupe who have to perform on a nightly basis whether I am there to watch or not (which I mostly won't be). There first performance would be the sound of music with Putin playing Maria von Trapp and Theresa May the lead Nazi.
I would slap Cath Kidston, and anything she has ever designed, and (just to be on the safe side), anyone who has ever purchased anything she has ever designed, into a giant hole.
Then I would look upon my work and see that it was good.
[i]Football's already been banned[/i]
Who's talking about football?? 🙂
Rotate France 180 degrees, Alps at the top, all the boring flat shit down the bottom, save about 8 hours each way.
And Rachel Riley, before any of you lot.
Get rid of countries. We are one planet we are all, with a few exceptions like Nigel Farage and Donald Trump, humans. We need to stop all this competitive nationalistic bollocks and sort the whole world out
Unfortunately it seems that even in one nation, what the people want seems to be split roughly 50/50 (I can think of two current cases). Unfortunate for the 50% who don't want what I want. Still, it should help bring the global population under control, so it's for the best really.
Also WiFi scroungers, round em' up and place em' inside a faraday cage.
Apply the 80/20 rule - for example get rid of 20% of unacceptable politicians (easy list) and that is likley to fix 80% of the problems and then in a continuous improvement program keep removing 20% of the balance - a self fulfilling fix - actually I think you could apply this to all aspects of society.
Please stand for the the National Anthem of the United Kingdom.Ey ey ba day ba wadladie day
Ay um ba day
Ba day ba wadladie day
Ey ey ba day ba wadladie day
Ay um ba da- ay um ba da-da-da-da wadladie day!
GWAN!
It's good. Really good. But it's not Oops Upside Your Head by the Gap Band.
(People of a certain generation will know that this is the national anthem you can sit down to.)
Oh and drag us down to somewhere round the bay of biscay. Leaving ireland where it is. Climate and surf.
Bring back Deadly Darcy.
Corporation tax rate in part dependent on number of office seats. Companies would invest in home working infrastructure and practises pretty damn sharpish, which would slash traffic on roads and hence pollution and energy use.
Could I ask whoever gets the gig to make Greggs devise a way of displaying the temprature of their pies without the lady having to put one in a bag for me to feel. It's about the only real issue in my life at the mo.
Oh and we better have a few more Rachel Rileys looks like shes going to be in demand.
rosscore - Member
...Single global currency.
Weren't you stridently against this kind of idea on the EU thread?
without the lady having to put one in a bag for me to feel.
😯
Could I ask whoever gets the gig to make Greggs devise a way of displaying the temprature of their pies without the lady having to put one in a bag for me to feel. It's about the only real issue in my life at the mo.
Just get some infra-red goggles. Would be available on the NHS to save money treating victims of gravy burns.
Commission the construction of a new B Ark.
Wonder who will clean up the pile of bodies i had to climb over to get here
[quote=dangeourbrain ]Wonder who will clean up the pile of bodies i had to climb over to get here
Rachel Riley?
Leave all brexit voters in the UK with no one able to leave or enter the country. Remain voters are allowed to settle wherever they choose.
Insert a GPS micro ship into every person in the UK. Thus reducing crime to zero as Big Brother wil know who broke into your shed and nicked your bikes as the GPS track will give the name of the perps instantly.
Charge £10 per bhp pollution tax/ RFL on cars. If you want a 520bhp Jag thats £5200 a year to keep it.
Anyone caught using a mobile whilst driving gets banned for a month and fined £1000. Doubles with each offence= becomes self funding within days.
The limit on benefits lowered to £1500 maximum pcm. I dont care if you have 6 kids and no job , why should you get more than the natinal average take home pay for sitting on your arse watching Jeremy Kyle on your 50" tele.
Stop HS2
Ban all adverts that advertise credit cards and replace the wording with debt
I am happy that I will never be in that position of power as the consequences might be a bit too drastic to contemplate
Commission the construction of a new B Ark.
Crap idea we will all get wiped out by a virulent disease contracted from a dirty telephone and depending on where it lands the mice will be furious that their work has been messed up again.
I think I'd appoint some seriously gifted people to help me work important stuff out. I feel maybe that experts might be useful although I understand this may not always be a popular view with those in power around the world.
I'd then have a nice holiday for a year or so while they came up with some answers. It's tiring being the boss after all.
I might also appoint some kind of visible figurehead who is incredibly outrageous who will appear to wield power but whose real job will be to distract people from my exercise of it. Anyone think of someone for the job?