I think it's useful to separate the "piece of paper" bit of a marriage from the ceremony and all that it entails (the prep, the party, the hangover, the honeymoon, the friends, the family). You can have one without the other, but I think it's best to have both together.
I got married* to MrAdamW because of love and security. I love him and also I have met people whose partners have died and the homophobic tossers in the other family came and took half of everything.
It was a public commitment (only 13 friends invited, not family) and was a fantastic day. And everyone turned up at my house afterwards to play on the PS2.
*yes I know it is civil partnership but that's what everyone calls it; I don't care. And I'm 100% with Woppit on the religious thing 😀
My wife stood before me with some items in front of her. Without a word, she emptied a large jar of mayonnaise and proceeded to fill the empty jar with rocks right to the top, rocks about 2" diameter, then asked me if the jar was full. I agreed that it was.
She then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them in to the jar. She shook the jar lightly. The pebbles, of course, rolled into the open areas between the rocks. My wife then asked me if the jar was now full. I agreed that, yes, it was.
She then poured a bag of sand into the jar with the result that the sand filled up the remaining spaces between the rocks and pebbles.
"Now," said my wife, "I want you to recognize that this is your life. The rocks are the important things - your family, your wife who loves you, your health, your children - anything that is so important to you that if it were lost, you would be nearly destroyed. The pebbles are the other things in life that matter, but on a smaller scale. The pebbles represent things like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff. Your X-box, football, the pub, porn. If you put the sand or the pebbles first, there is no room for the rocks. The same goes for your life.
If you spend all your energy and time on the small stuff, material things, you will never have room for the things that are truly most important."
I was dumbfounded.
Where would I get mayonnaise for my sandwich?
And I'm 100% with Woppit on the religious thing
You're a Woppitist? This is great, people are aligning themselves behind this guy.. brilliant 🙂
Nice story Jools but if he put the sand in first he'd get WAY more sand in.. think about it 🙂
We are getting married on the 1st July, we both wanted to. Been together just under 4 years and lived together 2 1/2 years.
Future Mrs Gixer gave up her family to be with me - totally disowned by her mum, dad, brothers, extended family etc. Partially for racial reasons, partly because of me being a lot older than her.
I see getting married as a way of showing her my commitment and love for her - despite me being a grumppy bugger a lot of the time. i am now at a stage in life where i am ready to settle down and hopefully have kids after all my years of being a selfish waster of a single guy.
I know it will give Mrs G a bit of security which she deserves.
The rocks are the important things - your family, your wife who loves you, your health, your children - anything that is so important to you that if it were lost, you would be nearly destroyed. The pebbles are the other things in life that matter, but on a smaller scale. The pebbles represent things like your job, your house and your car. The sand is everything else. The small stuff. Your X-box, football, the pub, porn. If you put the sand or the pebbles first, there is no room for the rocks. The same goes for your life.If you spend all your energy and time on the small stuff, material things, you will never have room for the things that are truly most important."
Brilliant analogy!
You're a Woppitist?
Oh yes. It involves daily showers in custard and self-flagellation with a stick of rhubarb. And [i]fromage[/i], which is like frottage but instead you roll around in camembert then snaffle I up with some biscuits and a bottle of chateauneuf du pape!