What is love?

i have always enjoyed the outdoors. luckily so does my wife of 35 years.

so if i were a single bloke who was into biking, or walking or such, my starting point would probably be some kind of a single persons club for whatever it was i liked.

i know a mate who rides with the local CTC. he met his wife through this. and my older sister her long term partner on a Exodus holiday walking in Peru.

online or blind dating would be my last port of call, id at all.

OP

Get outside and expose yourself* to others by joining groups and clubs,you might get lucky.

It happened to my SIL.

Single for a long time,she tried the dating apps but (sadly) never met anyone worth making the effort for.

Joined a walking group that also used a climbing wall ,met someone there.

4 yrs on and very happy.

* NO,not that way   😉

I think you can have a perfectly good relationship but not actually be in love with them.

Yep, get outside.
I’m in a running club and there have been loads of relationships formed within it.

After several years single, in my early fifties, and with seemingly no chance of a relationship in sight, I met my partner at a political meeting . I saw this slim clever outgoing red head, I assumed she wouldn't be interested in me a tall heavy  built,quietish mountain biker .

Fortunately I was wrong  and we're still together after ten years  so I can only suggest keep going out , and don't assume that no one is interested in you.

As above, if you want to meet someone who is into whatever it is you're into go and do whatever it is you're into and just talk to people there.

I like bike racing and have met four partners through racing bikes (over the course of 28 years mind, but a lot of that time I wasn't single) it works. Just don't expect that result every time, enjoy doing the thing because it's fun and if you meet someone else who enjoys it, great, if not you've had fun doing it

met my partner at a political meeting . I saw this slim clever outgoing red head,

ah, so you’re the silent partner in the nippy sweety divorce … SMILEY INSERT

I've been responsible (in my former username) for posts and replies to many an "online dating" type thread on here, since being single about 10 years ago. few relationships made me feel that that crazy love feeling was done and dusted.

I met my partner on Match. And at 59, fell into a wild, unexpected love. She only lives 1km away, next door to my niece. It's been bonkers. A year and a bit and it's all still amazing. I'd make me wanna vomit tbh.

Nearly into double figures and not a single 'baby don't hurt me'. Disappointing.

Ask Haddaway?

Ah, too late.

It can happen again, I asked a similar question a while back, fell head over heels for someone about 10yrs ago, wrong place wrong time, dating apps since and although fun and shorter term things came and went that feeling never came back, then last year I met someone online, few really nice phone calls then a really sweet first date with that giddy feeling coming back, that didn't work either... but was just nice to know lighting can strike to twice with a bit of perseverance!

I always hankered after that old GFs personality even though it had its faults, I'd really try to let go of that and let things just happen and be open to new personalities, the second person was nothing like the first but lovely in different ways.

I might be pushing my luck for a third lightning strike, I'm hopefully not waiting another 10yrs!

I have a cycling mate who joined a few walking groups after his 'cycling' lapsed a bit. He met a lovely lady, through one of the groups, both like walking, camping etc. Worked out very well for them both TBH. Well chuffed for him.

As others have said, find something you enjoy and go and do that.

Mine was cycling and going to gigs, somehow I struck gold at a gig by dancing madly and met someone who was as bonkers as me and by chance also a cyclist.

Had a number of relationships over the years, none lasted very long, and I wasn’t that bothered, having a few close friends and being happy with my own company. Then back in 2017 a photo popped up on Facebook ‘Someone you may know’, and it was a friend from over twenty years before who I’d lost track of.

We got back in touch, and she came to live with me. First time I actually lived with somebody, and while she had issues that I found difficult to deal with, we were working together to try to figure out how to help her get through them.

Then Covid hit, she had her first vaccination and a week later I lost her. That will be four years come the end of March, and while I miss her desperately, I’m not sure I could deal with having someone else in my life anymore, I’m just too set in my ways to adjust again.
C’est la vie.
Please, don’t message me, I’m happy dealing with this on my own, I’m in touch with Joey’s family, her sister in New York, her mum and daughters in Salisbury and her aunt in Brussels, and we meet up when we can, which pleases me greatly, that we keep her close and remember her for the sweet, lovely person she was in life.

ah, so you’re the silent partner in the nippy sweety divorce

Eh naw   I should have said mostly quietish

but is it possible to fall in love again?

No. HTH.

Oh, baby, don't hurt me

Don't hurt me, no more

Oh, baby, don't hurt me

Don't hurt me, no more

Some of the happiest people I know are single.

Nearly into double figures and not a single ‘baby don’t hurt me’. Disappointing.

I came here for the Kim Casali cartoons...

The above advice about joining groups/clubs of people with the same interests is really good.

I met nbt on a skiing holiday organised by a ski club.

Other friends met on a STW Pook’s pootle. They are really good friends of ours now.

Introductions from friends is also a great way to meet someone.

Good luck

TBH I thought it was something invented by greeting card companies,Jewellery shops and Hollywood  🙂

Apparently, climbing walls are the place these days.

After being single for a long time I got lucky and met someone with mutual interests on Facebook. She's ace. Mountain biker, walker, climber and lives in Eryri.

Some of the happiest people I know are single

Get all you youngsters with your Haddaway n'shite. I'm here from the 80's to quote Howard Jones at you!

What is love anyway
Does anybody love anybody anyway?

Between Howard's doubt and Haddaway's fear of getting hurt I think we're probably best avoiding it. Whenever song lyrics confuse I turn to HMHB for the definitive solution, and it appears to them that true love comes only if your other half looks like Jim Reeves.

The above advice about joining groups/clubs of people with the same interests is really good.

Def, it’s easier to have conversations if you’ve a common interest.

(luckily Mrs DoD likes sci-fi as she’s not really into tubeless tyres 🙂

Love is shoving stuff as hard as possible down into a full kitchen bin, so you don't have to empty it.

Oh, wait, sorry, that's marriage.

I met the current MrsMC on a charity walk up Ben Nevis. If she can put up with me till September it will be 30 years.

The shared interests thing is the best option for real life, though I know people who met online dating when their shared interests matched them with someone simar outside their usual geographical area.

Our cycle club has been going 7 years, with 200-300 members. There's been at least 2 marriages, at least 2 properly settled cohabiting couples and a similar number of divorces......

Yeah, but I just kept using the apps.

As people say, it really is a numbers game IMO.

more natural way than dating apps

I met my wife in Guardian Soulmates (now sadly shut) so don't dismiss them totally out of hand. But go on dates you know? Say yes even if you think there's no spark initially. But joining a club, going to the pub, all of those things will increase your chances

I think that the problem with the apps, isn't the apps per se, but that people use relationships as a sticking plaster to make themselves feel better rather than looking at and working on the fundamentals of their lives.

Get all you youngsters with your Haddaway n’shite. I’m here from the 80’s to quote Howard Jones at you!

What is love anyway
Does anybody love anybody anyway?

Yeah, I came in looking for Howard's mime artist, Jed, and was handed some modern rubbish. (What do you mean, 1993? It came out about two years ago, surely? 😀 )

Anyway, spike your hair up, slide yourself into your best double breasted suit and grab that guitar-synth. Jed, you're trapped in an invisible box...

met my partner at a political meeting . I saw this slim clever outgoing red head,

So it was you messed it up for Pink in The Wall....;)

I think that the problem with the apps, isn’t the apps per se, but that people use relationships as a sticking plaster to make themselves feel better rather than looking at and working on the fundamentals of their lives.

I find it odd that some friends and especially younger  colleagues are desperate to get on dating apps when sometimes long term relationships break down. I get the bounce back thing, but it appears they believe they can only be happy in a relationship, rather than taking a step back, some time to reflect and then move forwards.

As some one once said:

Sing like no one is listening.
Love like you’ve never been hurt.
Dance like nobody’s watching,
and live like it’s heaven on earth

So go out and join some clubs, do what you like doing, and when you meet someone enjoy it without looking backwards