[Closed] What did I do wrong?

Ah - should I ask her to piss on a stick?

one of lifes mysteries...

I find it hard to believe you could [i]ever[/i] do anything wrong Goan 😛

DD - I know what you mean. I did think I was wrong once. Turns out I was mistaken.

Proper lolled at your 2nd post 🙂

I have two children she can spend time with if she likes. I'm bored of them.

My wife once stopped speaking to me for two weeks for something I did......in one of her dreams.

To this day she maintains her behaviour was perfectly acceptable. The important thing is that you have clearly accepted it's your fault and now your doing the right thing in trying to find what you should be admonishing yourself over.

Lol at the dream strop! My wife was 'off' for a few hours because of something I did in her dream too. What is it with them?

Cycle?

Just when I think this place is becoming enlightened, along comes my favourite orangeman! 🙄

Wake up in the morning, acknowledge that you're wrong and get on with it.

deadlydarcy:
Just when I think this place is becoming enlightened...

I lol'd.

what do you tell a woman with two black eyes?

nothing, you've told her twice already.

(Does your wife have black eyes?)

(I don't condone violence)

deadlydarcy - Member
Just when I think this place is becoming enlightened, along comes my favourite orangeman!

A. I aint no orangeman
B. Enlightenment = STW = FAIL!
C. How did you learn to spell enlightenment in the bogs? 😆

A. I aint no orangeman

In the Black then?

What did I do wrong?

Easy!

She wanted sympathy, not a summary of her situation and a highlight of all it's positive aspects.

Women don't want to hear practical solutions, they want empathy and sympathy.

Next time run her a hot bath with herbal salts, light candles, give her a nice glass of Pinot Grigio and then sit and listen intently whilst she pours her heart out to you. Then say things like "I can understand how you feel darling" etc.

If none of the above is workable, sit the kids infront of the TV and put the Iggle Piggle DVD on. Then slip out for a pint before she gets home. 😆

In the Black then?

No, but I was in the Boy Scouts - is that a paramilitary organisation?! 😯

 

No, but I was in the Boy Scouts - is that a paramilitary organisation?!

Bigger and better men contained within the scouts IMO. Wouldn't be too difficult I suppose!

What is this "kids" of which you all speak?

What Spongebob said.

Men are practically minded and often make the mistake of trying to "fix" a situation or offer "helpful" advice.

Women are far more interested in empathy and understanding than practical solutions.

This is because they are all fundamentally mental.

[i]What did I do wrong?[/i]

Get married?

I had a wife once.....

Lifes good!

Today she has accepted that her actions were leaning a bit towards mental. All is good with the world again.

I'll still be getting her to piss on a stick though. 😉

I'm liking the lads who's wifes are on their backs because of a dream they had. I thought my wife was nuts but that's truly crackers.

Sometimes they just want to give you a kicking. Take it, pretend you're wrong and carry on.

Women.

Just listen and comfort but never ever suggest anything unless she asks you.

Probably going through a tough time.

I'm not married thank god. I feel like it though!

"Bikes are great aint they?!" 😉

Next time she comes in after her week of work, make dinner, give her a rub down/massage etc.

spongebob, graham s

have you watched 'white men can't jump' recently?

Anyone remember that scene from white men can't jump, the girl says shes thirsty, woody goes to get her a glass of water but she didn't actually want a resolution just empathy and sympathy and actually trying to [i]fix[/i] her thirst makes him a sexist pig (or something) I thought it was a load of BS but it turns out it's true.

Oh and I've been on the recieving end of a huff from something I did in [b]someonelses[/b] dream

EDIT oops TT beat me to it.

There's a lot to be said about being single in your 40s
plus I'm probably getting more sex as well.
Women are a different species ❓

"acknowledge that you're wrong"

I've always foudn the tricky bit is that you always then have to explain 'why' you were wrong. When half the time I don't know what I did in the first place this tends to be where things turn bad; "What's the point in saying sorry when you don't know what for? You're just doing it for an easy life" to which, sadly, I have no answer that's not going to end in tears.

Women are far more interested in empathy and understanding than practical solutions.

You know this attitude has always puzzled me. If a woman wants empathy and understanding rather than practical solutions then why would they as a man who they presumably know will focus on a practical solution rather than empathy?

Or is that just me being practical.

you're not supposed to understand, that's demeaning to women, understanding them.

http://www.icpug.org.uk/national/features/020702fe.htm
11 and 16 seem to apply 😕

Spongebob - Member
...
She wanted sympathy, not a summary of her situation and a highlight of all it's positive aspects.
Women don't want to hear practical solutions, they want empathy and sympathy.

I was once told to stop offering helpful advice & to just say nothing other than offers of sympathy a the OP just wanted to stick her head in the sand about the situation!

I have heard the "empathy and sympathy" bit lots of times. The reality is there are only so many times you can cock your head to one side in a sympathetic way, nod and go "that must make you feel awful"

as Samurai says, often you are just due a kicking - and the being sympathetic bit is just postponing the kicking, until you get something else wrong

It's not what you said, it's the way you said it!

Spongebob is a wise man.

I think the wrong thing you did was tricking her into marrying you. 😉

You are a man. Ergo you are wrong.

My second post would appear to have been bang on the money. 🙂

congratulations 🙂

"she's not getting to see our boys as much as she'd like due to the hours she's working."

It might not actually be about this. Maybe she is feeling run down, or taken for granted by her family or work collegues? Maybe there is some problem at work and she does not like to say what, so was leading up to it indirectly by indicating she would rather be somewhere else other than work? Does she do shifts and she is finding it disruptive - some people never manage to cope with the physical aspects of working odd hours.

I think perhaps she wanted you to ask what is wrong, because at least that would show care and concern. I am not saying either of you is right or wrong, just that there is likely to be a lot more to it than how many hours she spends with the kids. Does she have a friend or family member you can ask for info from? If she is bursting into tears and then getting either sulky or angry, there is clearly, to her at least, a deep felt and significant issue here. You need to sort it, as this sort of thing is how breakups start - one member of the partnership not feeling 'understood' and both failing to communicate sucessfully about what is going wrong, or worse, pretending nothing is going wrong until it is way too late to fix.

Midnighthour - turns out she's 'up the duff' and thus excused.

hehe, nice!

"She wanted sympathy, not a summary of her situation and a highlight of all it's positive aspects."

Spongebob- that is a remarkably sage and insightful observation. I think the mist has cleared and I can see clearly now!

If I can [i]just[/i] remember those words in the split second before I dole out my next 'solution' to her problems, we should both be in a significantly happier place!

Nice reading ability shown there midnighthour... 😉