Time for some honesty and a reach out for advice – Page 7 – Chat Forum

MoseyMTB · 2016-02-19T20:30:34Z

So, this seems a strange post to write but I feel like I've been living two separate lives. This last year things began to spiral out of control with my wife being diagnosed with Rheunatoid Arthritis at 27, me becoming a carer whilst her medication settles and my own problems with the onset of anxiety and panic attacks. Being told that we might not be able to have children was soul destroying. The medication my wife is on means a extremely high rate of birth defects and not being on the medicine leaves her crippled. All we wanted was a family so this really hit us hard. For the last six months I've become a shell of my former self. I don't go out to see friends, I make excuses to not be places and I let the anxiety win. All the while becoming a burden on my wife who needs me more than ever. The only place I've felt like myself is on here, and that's an image I paint of what I want to be and not who I really have become. I spend more time building bikes than I do ride. Now I feel trapped, we've moved t Stockport to be nearer my wife's family (which has been a real help) but I've no friendship group and spend my time at work and at home. I've put on weight and lost all motivation to stay fit. I took the step to take my life back and have started seeing a counsellor through the NHS, he's prescribed me citalopram but it destroyed my vision. The counselling is really helping and i do feel like there is a way forward. I want to stop being who I am, I want to get out and be the old me, but the anxiety stands in my way. I don't want to be a burden on people but I'll never make new friends if I don't take the step. I have a close friendship group but all have moved away with family and work. Biking and being outside make me so happy but the anxiety stops me getting out and meeting people. I don't really know what I hope to gain from posting this but maybe someone out there is feeling the same and needs that motivation too. I have an amazing family and the best wife in the world. Seeing me like this destroys her and she blames herself. The arthritis needs to be her focus not me.

MoseyMTB

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

I'm wide awake now with my head running wild!

That's my problem, simple things snowball out of control.

Things are in place for things looking up though.

Posted : 06/01/2017 1:57 am

scotroutes

Posts: 43998

Full Member

Aye well, here's a hint from a Father; Try not to sweat the detail. They don't give you a manual. Do your best, apply a bit of love and patience and it'll all be reet.

Posted : 06/01/2017 1:59 am

sbob

Posts: 5581

Free Member

Happy new year!
The length of the tunnel may vary but there is always light at the end of it.
🙂

Posted : 06/01/2017 3:06 am

JoeG

Posts: 0

Full Member

They don't give you a manual.

Here's part of it. 😉

[img] [/img]

Posted : 06/01/2017 3:09 am

Squirrel

Posts: 742

Full Member

I'm awake too and have been for hours stressing over work and other stuff. Just did a Headspace meditation session and feel better for it 8)

Posted : 06/01/2017 7:08 am

mike399

Posts: 0

Free Member

Thanks for the update and its good to hear things are looking up.
Two weeks before our first child arrived we moved house into one we had been doing up which didnt even have a ground floor or kitchen! The little one didnt know a thing about it and cant remember the year of living in a building site!
As said, dont sweat too much on the finer details...

Posted : 06/01/2017 8:39 am

teadrinker

Posts: 435

Free Member

Good to hear from you mosey. Wishing you all the best for the imminent arrival!

Posted : 10/01/2017 10:28 pm

Kryton57

Posts: 27603

Free Member

Likewise! All the best?

Posted : 10/01/2017 10:36 pm

MoseyMTB

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

Hi all,

Quick update.

We welcomed our beautiful baby Boy Charlie into the world yesterday.

There were complications due to Claire's arthritis medicine but that was blood sugar related and is all touch wood in hand.

Mother is doing well after a long labour and hopefully now we can experiment with medicine and try and get this horrible condition under control.

Thank you everyone for the amazing support and especially the people who sent clothes etc. Me and claire can't thank you enough.

Ian, Claire and baby Charlie 🙂

Posted : 26/01/2017 12:35 pm

martinhutch

Posts: 28593

Free Member

Congratulations to you all!

Posted : 26/01/2017 12:35 pm

weeksy

Posts: 28712

Full Member

Yay ! Fantastic news... congratulations.

Posted : 26/01/2017 12:38 pm

matt_outandabout

Posts: 46173

Full Member

Congratulations family mosey!

Posted : 26/01/2017 12:41 pm

scud

Posts: 4108

Free Member

BRILLIANT NEWS!

Congratulations, you deserve some luck mate, parenthood can be the most frustrating thing, but it is worth it, you will never love anything like you do your kids.

Posted : 26/01/2017 1:42 pm

nbt

Posts: 12509

Full Member

Wooo!

Posted : 26/01/2017 1:55 pm

ransos

Posts: 16221

Free Member

Yes!

Posted : 26/01/2017 1:55 pm

benp1

Posts: 5197

Full Member

congrats!

Posted : 26/01/2017 2:27 pm

stumpy01

Posts: 17863

Full Member

Great news! Congratulations

We've still got some bits & pieces that our daughter has grown out of (she's now 15 months), which I'd be happy to send over.

I can have a dig about & see what we've got. There'll be simple things like muslin cloths etc. that we don't use anymore. You really don't want to be spending money on stuff like that & you can never have enough of them....

Drop me a message on here (you can do that now) or reply to this, if you are at all interested. I can have a search through the stuff we have & get a bundle in the post....

Best wishes.

Posted : 26/01/2017 2:37 pm

eddiebaby

Posts: 13282

Free Member

Great news.

Posted : 26/01/2017 3:25 pm

scotroutes

Posts: 43998

Full Member

Fabulous.

Posted : 26/01/2017 3:42 pm

CharlieMungus

Posts: 0

Free Member

We welcomed our beautiful baby Boy Charlie into the world yesterday

Congratulations. I feel honoured that you would do that!

Posted : 26/01/2017 4:19 pm

MoreCashThanDash

Posts: 33298

Full Member

A story that deserved a happy ending if ever there was one. Congratulations, and welcome to a whole new world.

Posted : 26/01/2017 5:42 pm

monkeysfeet

Posts: 4078

Free Member

Congratulations buddy.

Posted : 26/01/2017 5:51 pm

MoseyMTB

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

Thank you so much everyone.

We really will never forget what all of you did for us over the last year.

The advice, generosity and offers of rides have really kept me going when at times I couldn't see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Posted : 26/01/2017 6:25 pm

Kryton57

Posts: 27603

Free Member

Hey Congrats Mosey! I hope all goes well with Charlie & Mum. Welcome to many enjoyable years. 🙂

Posted : 26/01/2017 7:51 pm

jambalaya

Posts: 0

Free Member

Brilliant news. Really wonderful. Thrilled for you and Mum.

Posted : 26/01/2017 8:02 pm

leffeboy

Posts: 10337

Full Member

🙂
and woo frickin hoo
and

Welcome to many enjoyable years

Posted : 26/01/2017 8:07 pm

MoseyMTB

Posts: 0

Free Member

Topic starter

[url= http://s1143.photobucket.com/user/mosey82/media/Mobile%20Uploads/CB5CFF99-4372-4508-ADD8-B6F370289201_zpstjbmdw0d.jpg.html ][IMG] http://i1143.photobucket.com/albums/n635/mosey82/Mobile%20Uploads/CB5CFF99-4372-4508-ADD8-B6F370289201_zpstjbmdw0d.jp g" target="_blank">http://s1143.photobucket.com/user/mosey82/media/Mobile%20Uploads/CB5CFF99-4372-4508-ADD8-B6F370289201_zpstjbmdw0d.jpg.html ][IMG] http://i1143.photobucket.com/albums/n635/mosey82/Mobile%20Uploads/CB5CFF99-4372-4508-ADD8-B6F370289201_zpstjbmdw0d.jp g"/> [/IMG][/URL]][/url]

Posted : 26/01/2017 8:41 pm

deserter

Posts: 176

Free Member

beautiful, well done to both of you

Posted : 26/01/2017 8:50 pm

vickypea

Posts: 0

Free Member

Congratulations 🙂

Posted : 26/01/2017 10:43 pm

twistedpencil

Posts: 1921

Full Member

Congratulations!

Posted : 26/01/2017 11:22 pm

MartynS

Posts: 2679

Full Member

Brilliant!
Congrats to you both!

Posted : 26/01/2017 11:33 pm

99percentchimp

Posts: 0

Free Member

Beautiful - brought a tear to my eye - many, many congratulations!

Posted : 26/01/2017 11:58 pm

chestercopperpot

Posts: 3537

Free Member

So cute. You have got treasure there 😀

Posted : 27/01/2017 1:01 am

pondo

Posts: 9223

Full Member

Aaaa! Awesome, well in. 🙂

Posted : 27/01/2017 1:02 am

matt_outandabout

Posts: 46173

Full Member

Aaaaaah.

Posted : 27/01/2017 8:28 am

milky1980

Posts: 0

Free Member

Excellent news 😀

Posted : 27/01/2017 9:15 am

markoulini

Posts: 23

Free Member

Congratulations, little Charlie looks amazing. Little ones are the best thing ever.

Posted : 27/01/2017 9:42 am

senorj

Posts: 0

Full Member

Lovely.
Congratulations. 😀

Posted : 27/01/2017 10:40 am

spawnofyorkshire

Posts: 1361

Free Member

Congratulations to you all!

Bugger it's a bit dusty in my office today after reading the good news

Posted : 27/01/2017 12:52 pm

jamj1974

Posts: 9242

Full Member

Excellent and he is very beautiful... 🙂

Posted : 27/01/2017 1:00 pm

granny_ring

Posts: 4795

Full Member

Congratulations to the two of you and good luck for future health and hapiness.

Posted : 27/01/2017 11:34 pm

teadrinker

Posts: 435

Free Member

Wonderful news, congratulations to you and Mrs Mosey 😀

Posted : 28/01/2017 12:03 am

richpips

Posts: 2350

Free Member

Congratulations.

Posted : 28/01/2017 12:08 am

badnewz

Posts: 0

Free Member

All's Well that Ends Well.

Posted : 28/01/2017 10:29 am

theotherjonv

Posts: 24879

Free Member

brilliant news!

Posted : 28/01/2017 10:33 am

[Closed] Time for some honesty and a reach out for advice