Walking through the local park, in the dark / early dawn at 5.45am. Usually I only encounter the very occasional dog walker as I'm heading down towards my bus stop at that time. This morning I heard a weird rumbling noise behind me and as I turned I caught a glimps of headlights speeding towards me on the footpath doing about 40mph.
I can't think of any other time where I've gotten such a fright, there's a massive spike on my watch HRM from that moment. It was a Bam-in-a-Balaclava on an electric motorbike. He twitched at the last second and passed me at arms length but the reflection from my glasses had made me think it was a car hammering down the path.
What a freaking fright I got, and who needs their heroin delivered at that time of the morning anyway?
I'm sure he thought it was very funny, I didn't.
🙄
Sorry, I'll aim better next time 😀
But yeah, they're a ****ing menace. Our particular problem is a narrow driveway exit with poor visibility due to 6' high gateposts/walls. Hasn't happened yet, but there's been close misses with bams blasting down the pavement at 20mph+ - with us both in vehicles and more worryingly when on foot. Silent assassins.
Bam?
Saw a pair of them on the ring road in Cheltenham yesterday afternoon, bold as brass in broad daylight, no helmets and balaclava'd for anonymity. Not sure what protection they think they'll offer but being young, dumb and immortal I'm sure it never occurs to them.
Happens alot around here.I wouldnt have given it a second thought.
Sorry @Speeder, in my head Bam is short for Bampot. An unpleasant nutter. Too many years working in Glasgow. I'm starting to pick up the patter. 😏
in my head Bam is short for Bampot
Isn't it "barmpot" (often shortened to "barmy")?
A fifteen year old lad killed in Chesterfield the other week and his passenger seriously, his parents have issued a plea that his mates don’t turn up on their electric machines. My view is that they should encourage them to attend and then the police can seize the bikes and scooters and crush them. Derbyshire police have a zero tolerance now, no warnings, just seize and crush.
Derbyshire police have a zero tolerance now, no
Hmm I there was a time when a lot of seized "goods" used to get "lost" whilst in storage. I am not sure times have changed .
Derbyshire Police have photos and film of skip loads being crushed….
I had one ride his bike at me on the pavement in Bradford last year. Rather than jump out of the way I took him off it with a dipped shoulder. He wasn't happy but backed off when he realised I was ready to kick his head off his shoulders with my size 15s.
Thinking back, I handled it badly. Next time he'd never get off the ground - I'd kick **** out of him then, crucially, destroy his phone so he couldn't call his mates. Last time, I had a somewhat anxious walk to the train station with my keys poking out between my fingers, half expecting a car load of scrotes to pull up next to me. Lesson learned.
This is funny!
The chef's kiss moment is while the perp blames the police officer for chasing him - while calling him 'bruv'...
My view is that they should encourage them to attend and then the police can seize the bikes and scooters and crush them.
Agreed.
They should crush the bikes too.
I had one ride his bike at me on the pavement in Bradford last year. Rather than jump out of the way I took him off it with a dipped shoulder. He wasn't happy but backed off when he realised I was ready to kick his head off his shoulders with my size 15s.
Thinking back, I handled it badly. Next time he'd never get off the ground - I'd kick **** out of him then, crucially, destroy his phone so he couldn't call his mates. Last time, I had a somewhat anxious walk to the train station with my keys poking out between my fingers, half expecting a car load of scrotes to pull up next to me. Lesson learned.
And there was me thinking Chuck Norris died last week yet here he is posting on STW.
The chef's kiss moment is while the perp blames the police officer for chasing him - while calling him 'bruv'...
" You made me come off" No I didn't "well don't chase me then" 😂😂
in my head Bam is short for Bampot. An unpleasant nutter.
That's what it means where I'm from (Glasgow ish).
in my head Bam is short for Bampot
Isn't it "barmpot" (often shortened to "barmy")?
Bampot in Edinburgh for sure
Not sure what protection they think they'll offer but being young, dumb and immortal I'm sure it never occurs to them.
It's a calculated risk. They know the police aren't allowed to give chase if they are not wearing a helmet.
That is an urban myth about police not chasing if they don’t have a helmet. It’s obviously subject to a risk assessment like any pursuit and depends on the crime committed. Really these machines shouldn’t be sold and parents shouldn’t buy them for their children…
I had one ride his bike at me on the pavement in Bradford last year. Rather than jump out of the way I took him off it with a dipped shoulder. He wasn't happy but backed off when he realised I was ready to kick his head off his shoulders with my size 15s.
Thinking back, I handled it badly. Next time he'd never get off the ground - I'd kick **** out of him then, crucially, destroy his phone so he couldn't call his mates. Last time, I had a somewhat anxious walk to the train station with my keys poking out between my fingers, half expecting a car load of scrotes to pull up next to me. Lesson learned.
And there was me thinking Chuck Norris died last week yet here he is posting on STW.
It's a calculated risk. They know the police aren't allowed to give chase if they are not wearing a helmet.
Clearly not correct, as several recent Police videos have shown.
The Chesterfield case is interesting - the parents have been damning in their comments, so presumably it wasn't his machine he was killed on?
They're going a bit hard in Queensland. In keeping with the state government's "Adult Time for Adult Crime" policy.
Apparently "12 people died in e-mobility-related incidents in Queensland in 2025, and more than 6,300 people presented to hospitals injured."
They've recently announced that Under-16s are banned from public use of all e-mobility devices (scooters, e-bike, e-motorbikes) and over-16s will need a learners licence as a minimum (you have to do a road rules test to get one here).
Also, speeding fines. Anything with a top speed above 25kmph will need registration and insurance.
Illegal devices can be impounded on a first offence.
Fines of $500 for carrying a passenger or not wearing a helmet.
How they intend to police this I have no idea... it is going to be very interesting.
Oh my goodness...
you’d think we’d have the technology to identify stupid reposting by now
burp burp
Bam is scottish slang. Short for bampot. Ie. Nutter.
The acronym of "below average mentality" was made up far later by middle class snobs such as the majority of this forum. Same as they did with chav and ned as they love a clever acronym to make them feel superior. It's funny how many of the exact same people would never dare use racial, gender or sexuality slurs but feel perfectly justified to slate someone because of their perceived social situation.
"schemie" is about the only name we have left free from clever middle class acronymage. Always was more of a street name than media recognised so it's use has somewhat died out other than within a few small Scottish communities. Unlike ned, chav or bam "schemie could be used in a similar way to the N word between brethren.
That is an urban myth about police not chasing if they don’t have a helmet.
it's no myth
It was a decision made individually within regional police forces based on the specific problems they experienced in the community. Yes. Obviously risk assessment was employed in their decision process. And yes. The actual crime committed comes into it too.
That is an urban myth about police not chasing if they don’t have a helmet.
It’s not at all and I have been told it by several police officers although I expect there’s a risk assessment done by the police at the time and it’s likely to be different across forces. I reported antisocial unlicensed motorbike riders near me and the police gave me a number to call when next saw them. I called and they responded straight away and then reported the outcome of this particular incident to me afterwards. Long story short they could not get the pursuit in a car authorised because of the lack of helmets. I think it may be a different set of guidelines if the officers are on bikes although not entirely sure why that might be.
Same as they did with chav and ned as they love a clever acronym
User name almost checks out.
The acronym of "below average mentality" was made up far later by middle class snobs such as the majority of this forum
Sez someone who has 3 posts to their name… 🤔
I’m pointing that out as someone who grew up most definitely as working class, and as someone who’s been on here for a lot longer than you have. You don’t need to be a ‘snob’, as you put it, to be pissed off by oiks riding illegal machines at high speed, threatening people with serious injury or potentially death.
Do you have anything actually constructive to say? 😒
Hmmm, joined March 13, twelve days ago…
…appropriate username, too. 🥱
"schemie" is about the only name we have left free from clever middle class acronymage.
Isn't that a derogatory label for someone from a council housing estate? Sounds like a basic working class superiority term to me...
Oh dear,
I apologise for the language in my first post. I meant no offence to the Bampot community. Please don't cancel me, I kind of like it here. Oh, and thank the Lords of Kobol that I didn't mention that the Bam's balaclava was black and he was almost certainly riding an east Asian import. Jeepers! How much trouble would that have gotten me into!
If it makes anyone feel better, I'm only now back at work after crashing the Voi e-bike I was riding on Sauchiehall Street a couple of days ago. Made a complete tit of myself. Apparently I can't just pop the solid tyred wheel of a 40kg bike up over an obstacle as easily as my regular bike. Who knew?
😉
The acronym of "below average mentality" was made up far later by middle class snobs such as the majority of this forum.
Oh dear, did a bam piss in your quinoa this morning or something? Or was it a ned, or a "schemie"?
That is an urban myth about police not chasing if they don’t have a helmet.
I spoke with the cops about this (they hold 'consultations' at my local library each month). Some cops can give chase if they've been trained, most cops aren't, so can't. they can only arrest them when they're stationary.
There's loads of idiots on both Sauron type and normal run-of-the-mill 50cc Icthi-Fanni that use the TPT near me for both drug running and just razzing about being a nuisance. I tend to leave them both alone, a local lad was caught a while back, and he had a kitchen knife on him (for 'protection') be careful if you're thinking of tackling these idiots
Bam is scottish slang. Short for bampot. Ie. Nutter.
The acronym of "below average mentality" was made up far later by middle class snobs such as the majority of this forum. Same as they did with chav and ned as they love a clever acronym to make them feel superior. It's funny how many of the exact same people would never dare use racial, gender or sexuality slurs but feel perfectly justified to slate someone because of their perceived social situation.
"schemie" is about the only name we have left free from clever middle class acronymage. Always was more of a street name than media recognised so it's use has somewhat died out other than within a few small Scottish communities. Unlike ned, chav or bam "schemie could be used in a similar way to the N word between brethren.
Also exported by Christopher Brookmyre , fine purveyor of Scottish slang 🙂
(and cracking tales).
+1 nickc and I bet the guy carrying the knife only got a slap on the wrist.