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attending public school should bar you from entering political office or a company directorship or management of any sort
(and yes the chip is giving me neck ache)
saying worst when you mean worse should be punnishable by flogging
saying worst when you mean worse should be punnishable by flogging
edited 🙂
I'd make it compulsary for everyone to take an alcohol agression test. Give them some beer to drink and then bang into them. If they kick off then it's illegal for them to drink for five years after which they're re-tested. That way only grown ups will be allowed to drink.
I'd also make it illegal to drive a car unless you've ridden a bike around the place for 6 months.
"It should be illegal for women over 35yo to wear skirts above the knee"
more the oppasite i think and any bird below thirty must only where skirts of mid thigh length or shorter ( BMI must be also a factor in this thought!)
as a second, no womens tight slinky revealing fashion to be commercially avaialbe in anything over size 12, 14 at a push!
me and my mate reguarly discuss this when in town on a sat night!
Back to reality->
I'd ban:
1, All those ****in "celeb" trash mags.
2, Reality TV like Big Brother, Jungle thingy, dancing on whatever etc etc.
3, HGV vehicles from usisng the motorway network between 06:00 - 09:00 and 16:00 - 20:00.
4, smoking in the door ways of pubs, restaurants & other public spaces where you have to pass through said smokers & their associated coulds of stench to get to your smoke-free eating, drinking & work area.
I'd ban
1)Bars that don't serve real ale.
2)The French, with the exception of the odd lady French.
"It should be illegal for women over 35yo to wear skirts above the knee"more the oppasite i think and any bird below thirty must only where skirts of mid thigh length or shorter ( BMI must be also a factor in this thought!)
as a second, no womens tight slinky revealing fashion to be commercially avaialbe in anything over size 12, 14 at a push!
me and my mate reguarly discuss this when in town on a sat night!
Yup as far as it works for bloke too. Blokes with more than 15% fat and no 6 pack should not be allow to wear anything other than a crap one piece worksuit.
Still feel the need for controlling women fashion 😉
Abolish baggage allowances on flights, and introduce tiered pricing based on body + luggage weight. Would be a lot cheaper for me, and would likely reduce the number of fat, smelly ****s farting in the recycled air.
Ban:
Fig rolls
Designer ripped jeans/T shirts
Shopping trolleys with wonky wheels
Celebrity Chef's (sic)
Introduce:
Compulsory contraception for all those claiming social benefits (heading for the door now)
i would introduce road tax based on miles travelled. journeys taxed on a sliding scale whereby its almost prohibitvely expensive to drive short distances in urban areas.
privatise the transport industry.
remove vat on basic cycle parts (not funky suspension frames, shimano yukuma etc)
10x basic salary limit on execs plus four day week yet people get paid the same for working five. there is enough money floating around amongst the 'elite' in this world to enable this.
ban mobiles that are able to play that shitty tinny music that the kids so love.
ban stupidly loud car stereos and exhausts.
one child policy. we need thining out.
privatise the transport industry.
Isn't it private already?
10x basic salary limit on execs
Think I'd be fairly miffed I was a director of a multi-national company and I could only earn 10x what the cleaner earns.
introduce tiered pricing based on body + luggage weight
Yes, totally.
You should have to 'apply' to have a child, approval will only be granted based on your means, IQ, general contribution to society etc
Higher tiers of income tax up to 95% on ANYONE earning over £1,000,000.
[i]Think I'd be fairly miffed I was a director of a multi-national company and I could only earn 10x what the cleaner earns. [/i]
Then you would need to raise the cleaner's pay all the way up to "plenty", allowing your own pay to be [b]10x what a decent person needs to live on[/b]. How bad could it possibly be? 😉
" privatise the transport industry."Isn't it private already?
Perhaps he means 'proper' privatised ........ ie : don't let members of the public use it.
introduce tiered pricing based on body + luggage weightYes, totally.
Yes total would be std weight for normal people plus 15 so 77kg...
No banning stuff... theres enough of that already.
Instead some options to be introduced :-
1) Risk assessments are to be an optional feature of H & S practice.
2) There is to be a choice of studying for the parenthood qualification or if they prefer to remain childless.
3) Parents wishing to sprog more than one child to choose another family member for euthansia to allow for the additional new bodkin to be accomodated on the planet.
4) Gas guzzling cars : The choice is to have one of these or a partner, can't have both.
5) Parents wishing to drive their kids to school have the choice of doing that and walking to work themselves from the school, or getting their kids to walk/ride to school and they can drive to work. Cannot do both.
6) Everyone has the choice of taking a risk or choosing not to. Nobody will be held responsible for the consequences other than the person making the choice.
More to follow
Ban HGVs from lane 2 of 2 lane DCs/motorways.
GrahamS - Member10x basic salary limit on execs
Think I'd be fairly miffed I was a director of a multi-national company and I could only earn 10x what the cleaner earns.
Meaning cleaners' wages double overnight. Socialism by the back door.
'Mon the revolution! 😀
Yes total would be std weight for normal people plus 15 so 77kg...
Shut it, ya bag of bones 🙂 I've not been that weight since I was about 14!
motorbikes... they can go - unless they can be made electric. I've got nothing against people dressing up like power-rangers, flying down country roads at twice the speed limit and landing in a hedge, so long as they do it quietly.
On a serious note - I'd enforce the primeminster to appoint government ministers (and maybe cabinet ministers as well) from all parties in the same ratio as the percentage vote at the last general election. It would cost nothing (since the positions already exist), would mean every vote would count and thus strengthen democracy while undermining the power of the governing party... but it'll never happen.
Then you would need to raise the cleaner's pay all the way up to "plenty", allowing your own pay to be 10x what a decent person needs to live on. How bad could it possibly be?
If the cleaner (or any lowly "unskilled" worker) was on minimum wage, which is after all supposed to be what a decent person needs to live on, then the CEO of the company would limited to roughly 110K.
Why, your outrageous laws would turn us into a nation of filthy peasants* sir! 😉
* aka "socialists".
limiting families to 1 or 2 kids would be a disaster long term - we have an ageing population and not enough young people to support them in the future when everyone wants to retire
we have an ageing population and not enough young people to support them in the future when everyone wants to retire
With respect I don't think you've thought that through properly :-
Less kids now = less old people in the future = less liability on the future kids = less need for more kids
I can see your point being an issue in the medium term, thus my new piece of legislation above :-
3) Parents wishing to sprog more than one child to choose another family member for euthansia to allow for the additional new bodkin to be accomodated on the planet.
Excess old people and input of new people dealt with in one go.!
fewer people now means more space, food and resources for the future generations.
there is only so much food you can grow given the fact the world's surface is finite.
sorry, i meant the opposite from privatisation. the term of which i can't think of right now.
make sure that all teachers and state employed office workers can read and write to a high standard.
legalise drugs.
ban tailor-made ciggies. rollies only, but no filters. it'd clean up our streets and countryside.
Re the smoking in doorways, it's illegal to smoke within 5 metres of any entrance, but the police don't enforce it. If they did it would mean you couldn't smoke in town centres at all in a lot of cases.
I think it should be made illegal for pensioners to drive on the roads between 4pm and 7pm.. So we can all get home easier after work.
They drive around in dreamland at peak times causing all sorts of bother..
No pensioners, retired, non working types to be allowed in shops at weekends or around lunch time, so good honest folk who pay them to do nowt can get on with things without being delayed
Ban Nissan Almera drivers from driving. I've never seen a Nissan Almera being driven well, not ever.
Mini drivers must be fit women. Not men or fat lasses.
Dog owners caught not picking up their mutt's crap must be made to eat it.
ban Politically correct rubbish. You will only offend the offensive anyway so who cares.
make prison a punishment not a holiday camp. Prisoners should help the community they damaged, hurt robbed from set fire to whatever they did, in pink high viz vests saying what they did so honest people can taunt them. Who gives a stuff about their human rights.
ban french cars from the UK. no other reason other then they are not very good.
You ONLY need to do risk assessments for activities that have SIGNIFICANT risks, if you want.
Ban all politicians from spouting their ferkin lies, punishment would be a night in the cellar with the hilbilly copper and gimp from pulp fiction. Then perhaps something they won't enjoy.
Sack it - just shoot the lot and start again.
Make it illegal for "Job seekers" to spend more than 5 years benefits on a car.
So called celebrity chef's & career politicians
I'd ban anyone who's Australian and over the age of 70 from skiing.
No bedwear to be worn beyond the boundry of the home i.e. no pyjamas in ASDA
School children must cycle/bus or God forbid walk! to school.
Some of these are stupid 😆 The 10x minimum wage one and 1 house per couple! WTF...
Closet Commies?
i would ban half the people on here from making laws.
i would ban half the people on here from making laws.
WTF ??? .................. you would allow half the people on here to pass laws ??? Are you MAD ffs ?!!!
"make prison a punishment not a holiday camp. Prisoners should help the community they damaged, hurt robbed from set fire to whatever they did, in pink high viz vests saying what they did so honest people can taunt them. Who gives a stuff about their human rights."
fantastic! best one yet! 😉
sir i salute you!!
"Make it so"
" The 10x minimum wage one and 1 house per couple! WTF...
Closet Commies? "
do you know what a communist is?
sorry ernie probably 95% on reflection
do you know what a communist is?
I do ............... it's someone who rejects Jesus, Truth, Justice and the American Way
................... Darling Papa
Shut it, ya bag of bones I've not been that weight since I was about 14!
Well not my problem 😉 if you want to be a fattist do it correctly ;).
What is wrong with communism? Oh yes sorry I forgot where I was 😉
Make it illegal for horses to sh!t on roads and paths and then for their riders to leave it there. They should start using their saddlebags to take the sh!t back home with them.
Any dog taken outside of the owners home should have to wear a muzzle.
Mobile ring tones that aren't a simple 'ring, ring'