In an idle moment of thoughtful preponderation this afternoon, it occurred to me that, generally speaking, Women take off their clothes in a very different way to Men?
Take the simple act of removing a T shirt for example. A woman does this in a flowing elegant move, generally starting at the bottom, cross their arms, and pulling the T upwards, inside out over their head in a single move.
Now a man does NOT do this, generally attempting to tug on sleeves or collar, removing the T from the top downwards. This is an ugly, bitty, and frankly unsatisfying way to remove a clothing item. Looking, if one is somewhat as lanky as I, like a cross between a daddy long legs spider having an seizure and heavily intoxicated lunatic making a shockingly poor effort at recreating Michael Flatleys "River Dance".
So, why, i ask is this. I put forwards the following hypothesis's
1) Women are genetically smaller and more flexible, resulting in them being more bendy and compact, enabling this "single move" technique to work
2) Women are taught by someone (their mothers?) at some point in their lives to remove clothing in this cool, alluring fashion
3) Women spend a lot of time looking at themselves in mirrors (unlike Men, see note 1 below), often when clothes shopping. As such, they quickly see how ridiculous it is possible to look when removing clothing, and so develop a "sexy" technique early in life
Answers on a post card please!!
Appendix:
Note 1: A Mans appearance ranks as [b]highly unimportant[/b] on his scale of "Things to worry about". Significantly lower than "Will i be allowed out to the pub tonight" and "Chip butty or Fish Finger sandwich" etc etc.
As a male engineer myself, i have long come to terms with the fact that my appearance is simply in effect the physical manifestation of my being, which just happens to be spread across a range of wavelengths within the visible light portion of the electromagnetic spectrum. As such, as long as those wavelengths occupy a significant enough bandwidth to ensure a basic practical need, commensurate with for example, being spotted by and hence not run over by Bus drivers etc, then my physical appearance is judged to be sufficiently "Fit for purpose".
😉
PS. If there are any real(see note 2) women on this forum, please chime in with the answer!
Note 2: Real women = people actually born genetically as a woman, rather than a bunch of grown men acting like women, as generally found frequenting these Forii..... 😉
Tl;Dr
However Women would put this in the correct forum
In my family, the two females seem to undress in two ways:
- "The Rapture": A small neat pile of clothes is left on the floor, looking as if the wearer has simply vanished upwards.
- "The Explosion": Clothes end up randomly scattered about the room/house/continent, with extra points given for getting them to hang from the lights or go behind the wardrobe.
I think some of it is that they;re taught how to remove clothes while exposing the minimal amount of midriff. When I take off my jumper it drags my t-shirt up, exposing enough pasty white flabby gut to blind someone were a light reflected from my torso
I imagine its because women are less likely to have a beer belly that requires hiding during the procedure. Even now my belly has largely gone I'm still wary of exposing my hideous flesh whilst removing upper layers.
No, just you.
Although women, in general, take off their jeans or leggings, socks and knickers in one swooping motion, leaving them in a tangled, unholy mess, requiring varying amounts of untangling time at the washing machine. Which could be better spent at the pub.
Women take their tops off that way as they'll only be wearing it once so it doesn't matter if it ends up being inside out. Men will expect to wear a t-shirt until it is rank and so won't want the hassle of getting it the right way again.
Sometimes i catch a glimpse of myself in a mirror and wonder who it is/ scare myself.
We might also ask why it is that both my better half and my daughter take off jumpers and trousers with one leg/arm the right way in and the other inside out? And why leave socks balled up inside said trousers?
that bra out the sleeve thing. still dont understand how that works.
I've never observed a woman taking off her cloths - they fall off automatically whenever I approach ?
Woman peel their tops off over their head from the bottom up because they have boobs. To be exposed to boobs in this fashion is a joyous occasion.
You're talking bollox!
Obviously to answer this question we'll need to do some proper research, ladies please form an orderly queue.
MrSmith - Member
that bra out the sleeve thing. still dont understand how that works.
POSTED 13 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST
It's like a magical trick.
They must disconnect their arms or something.
I guess it's how magicians can saw women in half.
CG; If i remove my t-shirt upwards, that's going to be just about the only thing you don't see.
My major issue is with wearing tight compression tops under my riding gear. then when I get back to the car park, I take them off and replace with the T-shirt that Scotroutes mentioned (the humming one that I've rescued from the washing pile for the purposes of wearing after a ride). The specific issue being that the sweatiness under my camelbak seems to glue the back of my top on, so using the head down crouch and pull hard with both hands on the back of the neck has to be done with such force that at times I manage to almost throw myself over in the style of a 1970's World of Sport wrestler. An image compounded only by the fact I've usually got bibs or bib 3/4's underneath.
Re ladies disrobing. The current Mrs V has a very wrong habit of disrobing 'bottoms first'. If i witness this, it means I see her naked from the waist down. From an early age, I learnt that you could see pictures of boobies in newspapers or under the 'Big D' peanuts, as long as your Grandad didn't notice you, but they always had pants or Daisy Dukes on. If you ever found a picture of a lady with no pants on (in a hedge usually - the picture, not the lady) then it was a certainty they'd have no top on either.
To this day, being naked from the waist down is just plain wrong.
[For a further discourse on this subject see various vasectomy threads, where i explore the humiliation of the 'socks, no mid section, shirt' look]
Women are genetically smaller and more flexible, resulting in them being more bendy and compact, enabling this "single move" technique to work
It's definitely not this. I pulled a muscle in my shoulder yesterday taking off my t-shirt doing this:
A woman does this in a flowing elegant move, generally starting at the bottom, cross their arms, and pulling the T upwards, inside out over their head in a single move.
I think rene59 might be on to something:
rene59 - Member
Woman peel their tops off over their head from the bottom up because they have boobs.
I think boobs might get in the way of doing that ungainly "reach behind the head and yank at the t-shirt" thing that my boyfriend does. Plus, women's tops are a bit more figure-hugging than men's, necessitating a slightly different removal technique.
I think you're right Legolam. Maybe if he held them out of the way you could try and see how hard it is then.
Is the OP some sort of peeping tom?
I'll ask him for help with this when he gets in from work - I'm sure he'd love to help out with what I presume is a purely engineering experiment...
To this day, being naked from the waist down is just plain wrong.
Ohhhhhhh no no no no.
There is one crucial exception to this rule.
Keira Knightly wearing one of my (clean) T-shirts the morning after. It's never happened but when it does then it'll be the exception that proves the rule.
Woman peel their tops off over their head from the bottom up because they have boobs.
it's this ^. Boobs get in the way of (almost) everything...
Rachel
Don't you just lurrrrve men? 😉
Errrrr...... is it just IT bods/engineers/desk jockeys that have this issue?
that bra out the sleeve thing. still dont understand how that works.
tried to do it in my bib shorts - almost ended up strangling myself in a cafe toilet!
To this day, being naked from the waist down is just plain wrong
donald ducking
How Hammy thinks he looks whilst taking his T-shirt off [img] 
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I'm just surprised this thread has made it this far without any sort of picture or animated gif.
EDIT spoke too soon!
Don't you just lurrrrve men?
Not really, no. (but that's a whole other story...) 🙂
Rachel
what other way of taking off a tee shirt is there? 😕
Women take their clothes off? 😯
When did that happen? 😐
A woman does this in a flowing elegant move, generally starting at the bottom, cross their arms, and pulling the T upwards, inside out over their head in a single move.
I do it like that. Always have.
Am I odd?
Men will expect to wear a t-shirt until it is rank and so won't want the hassle of getting it the right way again.
That s joke, right? Right....? 😕
On taking off her top my wife always exclaims, "feast your eyes".
believe me, after looking, i am fully feasted. 😯
believe me, after looking, i am fully feasted.
TPIWWP.
that bra out the sleeve thing. still dont understand how that works.
it works the same way as us men doing the 'y-fronts down the trouser leg'. Just imagine that your jeans are a blouse, your legs are arms, and your balls are boobs.
Why would you take your y-fronts off without taking your jeans off???
Rachel
unhook, arm out, arm out, bra out the front.
How's that difficult?
emsz - Member
unhook, arm out, arm out, bra out the front.How's that difficult?
shush - You're like Penn and Teller, you're ruining the [b]magic[/b]!!!!!
Why would you take your y-fronts off without taking your jeans off???
who needs a reason when you just can
Why would you take your y-fronts off without taking your jeans off???
[img] 
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😉
maxtorque - MemberNow a man does NOT do this, generally attempting to tug on sleeves or collar, removing the T from the top downwards.
I did it the from-the-bottom-arms-crossy way once, it turned me gay.
On taking off her top my wife always exclaims, "feast your eyes".
believe me, after looking, i am fully feasted.
Excellent. In my case when I take my shirt off "hold yourself back darling" is an easy request to oblige
Sorry to sensibly answer the question but...
Women remove t-shirts in this way to stop a massive static build up ruining our hair.
My bloke pulls his clothes over his head leaving his hair both flaccid and electrically erect. No girl wants that.
This is very especially important when removing merino base layers.
flaccid and electrically erect
😀
My bloke pulls his clothes over his head leaving his hair both flaccid and electrically erect. No girl wants that.
You did that on purpose, didn't you? Your choice of words, that is.
generally speaking, Women take off their clothes
I stopped reading at this point, what was the question?
PeterPoddy
"A woman does this in a flowing elegant move, generally starting at the bottom, cross their arms, and pulling the T upwards, inside out over their head in a single move"I do it like that. Always have.
Am I odd?
No, but i suspect you are gay. Best tell your parents, although i suspect they may have already guessed with that sort of behavior..... 😉
Oh, and, no i'm not a Peeping tom! (at my age, i'm now far more blatant than that......... 😉
Must be something wrong with me. I feel less of a man because I...
A) take my t shirts off from the bottom up so they are left inside out.
B) don't wear clothes until they're 'rank' they get washed long before that. usually after 1 solitary wear.
C) I take a clean t shirt to wear after a ride.
D)
cinnamon_girl - Member You're talking bollox!
It's an interesting topic, if only there was somewhere you could go to study this.....
[img] 
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Have some of you been thinking about this all night?
This thread is really funny.
When I broke my arm last year, it quickly became apparent that I couldn't undress the upper clothing in the usual manner, this meant undressing like a man (hubby showed me how).
Blimey what a struggle that was. Our way is far better.
Women may have the bra off inside a top but we have the pants, trousers and socks off in one hit, leaving the pile ready to be pulled up in the reverse order the next morning.
I'm not the only one am I?
No it only took 10minutes, to save research time I only watched the videos with two ladies in them.
My research confirms that even when undressing each other they still did the crossed arm thing!
Bunnyhop
Our way is far better
And so it starts........... 😉
If the hive mind concensus is that it is something to do with Boobies, then i need to do more research. Can one do a Social Science PHD on the "Effects of Breast Size and Volume on female undresssing dexterity"???
Don't worry i'll be sure to include my resources. Namely: Benny Hill et al 1973
😀
I think ymmv depending upon body shape and cultural influence (sometimes regardless of gender). Can we apply names to different styles of de-garbing?
ie. the 'Behold The Eye of Sauron!':
[img] 
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I've always taken my Ts off in the female (according to this thread) manner, kids insist on attempting the pull from the top way and quit often fail miserably. Only time I do the "bloke" method is when taking off a jumper or sommat in public without exposing my midriff (not wanting to excite the ladies obviously - nothing to do with muffin tops)
I concurAlthough women, in general, take off their jeans or leggings, socks and knickers in one swooping motion, leaving them in a tangled, unholy mess, requiring varying amounts of untangling time at the washing machine.
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nice find, first person to post a similar vid with STW Tshirt and ubiquitous forumite beer belly wins a prize
Women are rubbish at flicking their underpants off the end of their toes and catching them on their heads, in my experience.
You need to check your research
no it doesn'tHis ... results in the t-shirt still being the right way round
no woman (who is not being paid to do it) in history has ever taken her shirt off like that.I like her way best.
🙂
In case this is still going on the 23rd I'm passing through London town if anyone is going to fund a research mission.
Miss Houns does
Mmm
Thats a bit gratuitous 😕
D0NKno woman (who is not being paid to do it) in history has ever taken her shirt off like that.
er, perhaps you are just not hanging out with the right kind of women??
http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/gifs-you-could-watch-all-day or it didn't happenMiss Houns does
I've been sat in this hospital bed for some one now, studying those boobs.
They don't wobbly AT ALL. I suspect they might not be entirely natural. Still, better than Candy Crush Saga...
Rachel
As if anyone on Singletrack has ever seen a woman take her clothes off.
Seems like mods don't like ladies with t-shirts off after all........
I have to say, it lasted about 10x longer than i thought it would.
[quote=allthegear dijo]I've been sat in this hospital bed for some one now, studying those boobs.
They don't wobbly AT ALL. I suspect they might not be entirely natural. Still, better than Candy Crush Saga...
Rachel
I don't know, he's quite buff. I'm watching it surreptiously in the office. BTW I thin they're referred to as "pecs" on men 😉
I'm going with real
as opposed to malvern_riders 100% natural eye of sauronThey don't wobbly AT ALL.
maybe they just don't like fakesSeems like mods don't like ladies with t-shirts off after all........
I'm surprised this thread has lasted as long as it has with only blokes taking t-shirts off, and I'm sorry but that fat bloke removing his t-shirt has now scarred me for life 😯
If I complain about seeing that chap take his shirt off will that be taken away too?
Oi, I resemble that comment... 😯
it's this ^. Boobs get in the way of (almost) everything...
My in house consultant confirms this.
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Is it like parking?