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Punch lines of memo...
 

[Closed] Punch lines of memorable jokes ?

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I heard you the first time—I'm putting on my shoes


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 9:35 am
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and one for the road..


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:06 am
 Spin
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am not sure who the other 2 are but is that Jeremy Beadle in the middle ?

...but on the other hand it's tiny.


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:07 am
 Spin
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(I definitely need to hear the Morag joke)

[url= http://boards.fool.co.uk/highland-hospitality-11915081.aspx ]Slightly different but you'll get the gist[/url]


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:11 am
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Not your lucky day is it ?


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:23 am
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Do you understand now 2 dogs f*****g


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 11:29 am
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Lemon entry, my dear Watson!


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 11:46 am
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Smee again, goan **** yourself. 😀


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 11:48 am
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Think yourself lucky, I've got to walk back by myself!!


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 11:54 am
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I just wanted a big orange head...


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 11:55 am
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"'Rectum', miss? More like killed 'em"


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 12:02 pm
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"If I'm going to have to gargle the holy water I want to do it before Sister Assumpta sticks her arse in it"


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 12:16 pm
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"Fatima Whitbread" ..... That reminds me of this one....

"You'd have a go at eating a cricket ball"

A friend nearly choked to death when I told him that joke many years ago


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 1:53 pm
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Gang rape


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 2:09 pm
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Only for a choccy bicky


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 2:24 pm
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I can't marmalade my c*ck up a girls bottom


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 2:44 pm
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Your poster of beyonce


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 3:44 pm
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Which goes to show that Hans that does dishes is as soft as Gervase with a vile green hairy lip squid


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 7:27 pm
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Sexy kids!


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:11 pm
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Right where`s this old woman ive got to kill ?


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:18 pm
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'I'm a prawn again Christian!'

And, of course:

'What? With these feet?'


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:24 pm
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They both went down after trying to take a little Phillipino in the ring!


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:36 pm
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"'Rectum', miss? More like killed 'em"

*applauds taste in jokes*
That is a classic biology teachers joke.


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:38 pm
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Presumptuous? Moi?


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:39 pm
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@MoreCashThanDash

Shirley, the hairy lipped squid is wild, not vile? (rhymes better anyway)


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:55 pm
 mokl
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... her head was missing.


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 8:57 pm
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you can't cut cliff richard in half, fill him with warmed-up chopped liver and use him as a sex-aid

(thanks for the morag link, spin)


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 9:07 pm
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'And chucked out the Mexican!'

Brian Glover, sadly missed...


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 9:16 pm
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"...teeth like the holy commandments - ten of 'em, every one broke!"

Mike Harding


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:11 pm
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I know, and that's not my finger.


 
Posted : 17/08/2013 10:26 pm
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'It's OK, The hamster's a ventriloquist'


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 12:14 am
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You can come in so long as you don't start anything


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 7:24 pm
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A faster than light neutrino walks into a bar.


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 8:58 pm
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That's from the man who shat in my pants.


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 11:09 pm
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You shouldn't stand for that- you go and sort him out, i'll look after your monkey.


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 11:14 pm
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Because he was kneading a jobbie!.


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 11:26 pm
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David the doorbel, thats why I'm knocking.....


 
Posted : 18/08/2013 11:34 pm
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'And you know it's amazing the strength you get when you bite your ane willy'


 
Posted : 19/08/2013 12:39 am
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Madam those are your breasts, and if you keep turning those screws you're going to have a beard.


 
Posted : 19/08/2013 3:29 am
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Only next time no feathers, we'll use the whole chicken.


 
Posted : 19/08/2013 9:34 am
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Oh,you don't see many of those about.

[i]( Has to be said with lips in a tight O )[/i]


 
Posted : 19/08/2013 10:01 am
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I've got to have somewhere to park my bike

(Billy Connolly joke)


 
Posted : 23/08/2013 1:21 pm
 LHS
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Welcome to Jamaica, have a nice day.


 
Posted : 23/08/2013 1:38 pm
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you shouldve seen the monkey trying to put the cork back in


 
Posted : 23/08/2013 1:39 pm
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"Jihanjir Bandin"

or

"You're the guy who shat in my tuba!"


 
Posted : 23/08/2013 1:43 pm
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