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[Closed] People that just ignore your advice

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I know, it's hard to believe this can happen to an STWer 🙂 but it does. And it really does my head in sometimes when a friend asks for advice/ideas, I offer what I can, and they completely ignore it before moaning on and on about still have a problem.

Example #1: Friend has a horse with some kind of ailment. Has asked a couple of vets/experts but not received any helpful advice. I gave her the contact details of someone I know who specialises in "fixing" horses but has she bothered to call? 6 months on and has she *. Horse still has the same problem.

Example #2: Friend uses a local garage for all her car servicing/repairs. Garage has been a bit shifty/pricey for a couple of years so she asks if I can recommend someone. As it happens I know some excellent mechanics, so give her their numbers. Has she done anything about it? No. Still goes to the same people and still moans each time.

Example #3: Friend wants some new prescription glasses and doesn't want to pay high street RRP. Asks me if I know anyone. I gave him the URL for [url= http://www.selectspecs.com/ ]SelectSpecs[/url] who did my Oakleys for £250 less than VE and turned them round super quick. Has he called them or been on their site? Nope. 3 weeks after asking he's still moaning about not finding someone that does what he wants.

FFS people. If you don't want to be helped, don't *ing ask.

/and breath.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:08 pm
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Maybe your 'friends' have clocked you as someone who is full of shit and act accordingly.

No offence, like...

😉


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:11 pm
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its something you notice more as you go through life, people dont change quickly, over time very slowly. if they never listened they still wont. the trick is to learn to not be bothered by it yourself AND maybe stop advising them will help.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:11 pm
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Yeah, definitely something I've noticed more in the last 10 years. I've known a few people with mental health issues who at times were really keen to change XYZ but often took a step back as soon as they started making progress. That, I can understand. But people who just dick about when all it takes is a phone call or whatever have no excuse.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:15 pm
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Maybe they don't like your advice and think your judgement of what's "good advice" is a bit off.

Suck it up.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:15 pm
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Rusty Shackleford - Member
Maybe your 'friends' have clocked you as someone who is full of shit and act accordingly.

😆


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:18 pm
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Posted : 04/02/2014 2:20 pm
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Ho ******* ho, wait til you lot come on here asking for advice/ideas ... and I'll tell you to FRO 😉


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:21 pm
 aP
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For Racing Only?


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:23 pm
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it is particularly annoying when it is your area of expertise. i think most people want you to confirm their predujices and they keep asking people until someone confirms it.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:26 pm
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You've just described my MIL. She waits until she get the same advice as I've given out from random strangers and then suggests it to us. FFS.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:27 pm
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However op I know exactly what you're talking about and due to some recent events I just don't bother any more. Just let them get on with it ...
[clearly I also talk a load of bollox]


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:27 pm
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Some people don't want advice they just want sympathy... "there there, feeling any better now luv?"


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:31 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:35 pm
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it is particularly annoying when it is your area of expertise.

Don't even get me started on that one!


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:35 pm
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it is particularly annoying when it is your area of expertise.

The OP is an Online Optician with a sideline as Chairman of the Good Garage Scheme and on weekends is a freelance Horse Whisperer.

🙂


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:40 pm
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Happens all the time with my BIL

Asks for [s]reasssurance [/s]advice which is not what he expected so just carries on and does his own thing

Particularly galling when he later offers the same advice to me

Me: don't buy a Vauxhall Rob they're shit!
some time later...
Him: that Vauxhall I bought was shit don't buy one whatever you do!


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:51 pm
 br
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[i]it is particularly annoying when it is your area of expertise.[/i]

Yep, and pretty much occurs every day at work...

"Just because you've managed to get your home WiFi working does not make you an expert with IT; especially where systems are required 24/7!"


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 2:56 pm
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I'm with you op. No problem with people not taking my advise. Just don't keep on moaning to me if you don't,
Are you listening Mrs Taxi !!!!


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 3:10 pm
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au contraire!

Part of my job is giving advice. I prefer when people don't take it. Relieves the pressure somewhat 🙂


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 3:14 pm
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What irks me is the follow-up questions.

"I'm trying to choose between doing X and doing Y, what should I do?"

"Well, whatever you do, don't do Y or you'll have a complete disaster on your hands."

...

"Hi, I did Y and now my Z doesn't work..."

ARGH! Almost as annoying is "I've bought one of these, is it any good?" Bit late if it is, sunshine.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 3:15 pm
 Keva
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loads of people at work ask me for advice on diet and training to lose a bit of weight... no one seems to take any notice and it seems they prefer cakes and biscuits 😕


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 3:25 pm
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When you say 'friends', do you really mean 'people down the pub' whose conversations you overhear and you just offer advice too, like that bloke on the Fast Show.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 3:32 pm
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INR?TS


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 4:03 pm
 LoCo
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it is particularly annoying when it is your area of expertise.

Don't even get me started on that one!

😆 😉


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 4:05 pm
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These people are known as 'askholes'.


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 4:43 pm
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My mrs family are like that.. her uncle asked me about getting a computer for home, now he really isn't tech savvy and so i asked him what he wanted it for " bit of surfing "(wiki etc and Skype). No shopping, no word processing no games as such. Right ho i said what you need is a tablet like a note or tab for around £250, easy to use and all the stuff you need and nothing you don't. OK he said, a week later he calls me "got it! can you come and set me up?" yeah OK, got there and hes bought a laptop!, i said to him WHY??, oh my son law said this was best for me WHY? cos hes got one... OK why didn't he set it up for you?.... "doesn't know how"... good grief. 😯


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 4:57 pm
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Maybe getting their horse 'fixed' wasn't what they were looking for


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 5:01 pm
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Can we cross link this thread with the one about things your other half does wrong and then blames you for - there is a certain synergy I feel?


 
Posted : 04/02/2014 5:48 pm