Guy in office on phone
'What's that?'
'You're getting married?'
'Who to?'
'But, isn't she your cousin'
'You're messsed up, you know that'
😯
Mum visiting my dad in hospital.
Dad: "How's my little boy?"
Mum: "Oh, he's fine. I've left him playing out with the little black one next door."
Me (thinks): "Christ, I hope no-one heard that."
(the 'little boy' is their cat...)
Piedi - do you work nr Barnsley?? 🙂
yamyamblade - Member
Piedi - do you work nr Barnsley??
Na Dagenham in Essex 😕
My mate once informed a sub con machinists that the bores they had machined for him were "ovulating".
Oh how we chuckled.
My wife once informed a travel agent that beaches in the Gambia suffered corrosion...
Ho ho ho Cougar, simalr story walked into a room to a friend identifying her dogs over the phone with 'no the bitch is black'
Overheard on someone elses office - I called a timber yard in glasgow to get a price for a order. The guy I'm calling goes to get prices and leaves the phone on his desk so I can hear the office banter. As he's looking up prices he engages in banter with a woman in the office by telling a lovely little joke about domestic abuse.
Him: "What do you call a woman with two black eyes?"
Her: (pause - then a staccato, increduloius) "What?!"
Him: (oblivious) "Nothing, you've already told her twice"
pause
Her: "You what?"
Him: "What do you call a girl with two black eyes"
Her: "WHAT!!!!!"
Everything goes quite, then someone picks up the phone and says "He'll call you back mate"
He didn't