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 bgd
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[#6277885]

Although I seem to spend a lot of my life on this forum, I don't post a lot. I'm not a great conversationalist, I'm probably not really much of a people person to be honest but I love this website and I know a lot of singletrackworld members have found a great deal of support from a great bunch of people on here, most of whom they'll probably never meet.
I've read a lot of the posts from people for who life isn't so great and always wanted to leave words of encouragement and support but have never known what to say. I never thought that I'd be writing my own (im afraid rather rambling) 'bad news' post.
At ten o'clock this morning my 3 year old son had a check up at the doctors as he was a bit off colour and seemed to have even more bruises than he normally had from being a lively active toddler.
Two hours later he's in hospital having blood tests and another two hour pass and we're given the news he has leukemia. Cue shock, anger, despair and before we know it we've arrived at Bristol children's hospital were we will be for the foreseeable future.
It's 5 o'clock in the morning and I know I should be trying to sleep, but the sun's coming up and all I can do is lie here thinking about what's to come. I know Haydn is in the best possible hands but as I lie next to him I can't settle for the thoughts of what this amazing little boy is going to have to go through.
I'm sorry if I have rambled or sound like all I want is sympathy (I really dont), I just needed to vent a little and maybe now get some sleep.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:15 am
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Vent all you like, some times talking to strangers is easier than friends and family.

I'm not great with words myself, but I hope Haydn finds the strength to fight it.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:31 am
 bgd
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Thank you. He will, he's a tough little guy and is so far dealing with it much better than mummy and daddy.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:37 am
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That's put today in perspective for me.

All I'll say is that I'm here, only as a result of Bristol children's hospital; as you know, you're in the right place and please continue to ramble/vent/update whenever you need.

Thoughts with you all today.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:39 am
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You're allowed to vent and you're allowed to want a little sympathy/human kindness even from strangers. It isn't and won't be an easy time but like you said, Hadyn is in the right place and will get the right treatment. Stay strong and positive but don't be afraid to share when you're not feeling strong or positive.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:47 am
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This is one of those times where I really don't know what to say. Good luck and I hope things work out for the best. There will be someone a lot more eloquent along in a while that will say it better than I ever could. I'll put a metaphorical +1 to all of those comments.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 5:54 am
 ski
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Here too, really don't know what to say, I cannot imagine what you are going through at the moment, makes all the small things everyone gets wound up about look insignificant, good luck and feel free to vent/update here.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 6:10 am
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Good luck.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 6:38 am
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Good luck. Kids are amazing and I'm sure he will amaze you with his stregnth and will to beat all that comes at him. Go Haydn!


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 6:58 am
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sat here with my 3 yr Old boy Leo reading that... Best wishes all round, but extra healing vibes and good thoughts for Haydn.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:18 am
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As a parent of young kids, I can barely imagine what you are going through.

Take heart that he is in the right place, will get the best care and that many kids beat this nowadays. Get all tbe support and advice from the hospital and charities you can, not just for him but for you and his mum. I've watched friends let their families implode when they've tried to hide cancer and deal with it alone.

And there are dozens of strangers on this forum who are all rooting for you. Adversity does bring out the best in us.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:24 am
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Best wishes to you bgd x


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:31 am
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good luck & more healing vibes.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:32 am
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Best wishes to you and Haydn


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:33 am
 Drac
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Thoughts with you and best of luck. Kids are tough little things and he'll take it better than you might expect.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:36 am
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I have a tough work day I was worried about, we worry about the most inconsequential things.
Thoughts with your family.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:47 am
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BEst of luck and wishes for the coming time mate. It's something I can't even comprehend happening. As much as my little 5 year old is the pain of my life... well, you know..

Hugs.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:50 am
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Not much to say really apart from good luck to you all.
I'm sure Haydn is in the best hands at the hospital.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 7:56 am
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Good luck to you all and the little fella.

I know a kid who had it at a similar age and he is now at secondary school, plays lots of football and is a regular kid. They had a tough time when he was ill but I think it can be very treatable in children.

All the best.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:08 am
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best of luck, you can beat it!

A lad a went to school with had it and beat it, it's a tough ride for sure, support each other and I'm sure you can do it.

There was a guy I met at the weekend as it happens who's son had just done it too, he was about 4/5 still bald from the treatment but was running around full of life with the other kids playing.

I'm sure it's hard, I can't imagine how I'd react myself but stay strong and best of luck.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:16 am
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It's very hard to find an adequate response save to say my thoughts are with you and Haydn.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:25 am
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Obviously words will only be scant comfort, but all the best. It's the type of thing every parent dreads and I cannot imagine what is likely to be racing through your head. Stay strong. Stay positive. Don't bottle it up, and the very best of luck to you.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:25 am
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I can only echo what everyone else has said. Good thoughts and good wishes to you, Haydn,and his mum.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:27 am
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Sure puts all the petty bickering about bullshit that we do on here all day into perspective.

Best of luck mate and your lad. Just shows that we never know what's around the corner.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:27 am
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It is simply the worst thing in the whole world when your children are ill. Be strong for him and I'm certain he will surprise you with his strength. Children are much more resilient than we ever can imagine.

My thoughts are with you both and you family mate. You want to vent, to pour out words, then you do it and there are always people here who will be here, always willing and wanting to listen and help.

Good luck to you BGD and Haydn


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:38 am
 bgd
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Thank you all for your kind words. Will update as it happens


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:38 am
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I don't normally post on these threads as like yourself don't really know what to say.

Haydn really is in the best place for him right now. I'm guessing ward 34. My wife works there, although she's on maternity leave at the moment. They will do absolutely everything they can to not only treat him but make his time there as comfortable and enjoyable as possible, under the circumstances. As I'm sure the staff will tell you the treatmeant success rates these days are much better than they used to be years ago, so take heart from those success stories.

Good luck, and go Haydn.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:52 am
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All the best - my thoughts are with you. Having a toddler helps me understand how hard news like this must be to take.

Remember it is ok to be angry, it is ok to be upset and it is ok to be scared. Look after your little boy and whilst it may be hard answer any questions he has honestly but appropriately for his age - I am sure the staff at the hospital will help you with this.

Make sure you and your wife look after each other too and get all the support from family & friends you can.

My cousin had Leukaemia when he was about 4 or 5 and was very ill for a number of years, I think until he was 12 or 13 but he is now in full remission and a very happy 20 something year old.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 8:58 am
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I saw this post and didn't want to read and run. I know how you feel as 6 years ago we were given the devasting news that our daughter had cancer. The first may bank holiday she was full of life and by the next she was having chemo. We were in bits as when you have kids you never expect to hear the words that your kid has cancer. The emotions I felt were of numbness, disbelief, feeling scared and also grieving for the change in our lifestyle.
Kids are amazing and I met many who were so ill one day and the next running up and down the corridor with their parents following behind wheeling the chemo drip. Emma would regularly ride a trike up and down and would aim for the ward cleaner on a regular basis.
We had long stays in hospital so me and my husband would take it in turns staying with her for a few days at a time while one of us would rest and come to visit later. Also CLIC Sargent were a great help with paperwork, money matters and also good listeners.
We had a good network of friends who would regularly visit with much needed food and also would look after Emma so we could go and have a quick bite to eat, time out.
My email is in my profile if you need to talk. Your son is in good hands and while times are tough there will be good times along the way. Look after each other and feel free to vent


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 9:41 am
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So sorry to hear about that bgd. No first hand experience from me, but a big bunch of healing vibes to Haydn.

Come back here - you and your wife - and vent and cry and laugh and talk crap. No-one will judge you.

Good luck!


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 9:55 am
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All the best for your boy.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:10 am
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Best of luck to all of you.

It's exactly reasons like this that I've got my details registered for being a bone marrow donor.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:31 am
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keep your head up mate, he's in the best place. all the best to you and the family


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:34 am
 bgd
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Thank you again for all your comments.
Mark90 - we are indeed on ward 34 and please tell your wife how wonderful everyone is.
Saw the consultant earlier who confirmed it is the most common type of leukemia and is very treatable. It's just going to be a rough ride, but then if we didn't like bumps we'd be roadies 😉


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:39 am
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Stay strong bgd for Haydn.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:54 am
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It's just going to be a rough ride, but then if we didn't like bumps we'd be roadies

Aye! Good luck - hope things work out.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 1:59 pm
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Best of luck to you all &, horrible horrible situation.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 2:07 pm
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I work in an SEN school. One of my students has just asked me why I am sad (teary), and I told her a simplified version of your events. She asked me if you loved Haydn, and I said you seemed to very much love him. She smiled and said [i]"that's all that matters"[/i], and has just breezed off to P16 Science.

I don't think I could've summed it up any better. Bsst of luck to you, your family, and especially your boy.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 2:17 pm
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Best of luck, can't think of what to say but I've been thinking about you and yours all day.

It's just going to be a rough ride, but then if we didn't like bumps we'd be roadies

Actually made me lol


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 2:33 pm
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please tell your wife how wonderful everyone is

Pleased to hear it 😉 Sure they'll take good care of you all.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:14 pm
 Yak
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Missed this earlier. Healing vibes and best of luck.


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:35 pm
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Just discovered this and my heart goes out to you and yours, bgd.

Stay strong for Haydn and, as others have said, don't be afraid or apologetic to feel whatever you feel. Come on here and vent, and lean on everybody and anybody you can.

You can thank everyone later, when Haydn is well again, and bouncing around more than ever.

All the very best to you all...


 
Posted : 18/06/2014 11:44 pm
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What they all said. Healing vibes and hugs from.all the vaders


 
Posted : 19/06/2014 6:16 am
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+1 to what others have said. Good luck to you all and especially to Haydn.


 
Posted : 19/06/2014 7:50 am
 hora
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I know its a nightmare of worry when your boy is ill. We were in and out of hospital alot 0-2yrs and compared to you OP ours was trivial. Hadyn has a good dad. 🙂


 
Posted : 19/06/2014 8:07 am
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