[Closed] Negotiating Celery...

Nuke everything from orbit...to the max...

I detest celery and try my best to avoid it at all times.

Thought this thread might be the answer. I is disappoint. 👎

Have you made sure your boss does not like celery? what if he loves the stuff? He will definitely be clicking on this thread.

Anyway, I avoid celery, unless cooked for hours in a stew.

The only way

This hasn’t really worked has it... 😀

Your boss after you ask for an increase.

Kryton, my office. 0900. Monday morning.

Don’t go in asking for peanuts would be my advice

Don’t forget to ask for some salt and a toothpick.

Kryton, my office. 0900. Monday morning.

Is this a job offer?  How many paperclips to meet my ote?

Make sure he doesn't know about the extra salad from the tax band drop first, it only matters what other people are on if you feel insecure about it.

are you prepared to leaf if he won't meet your demands?

It's a bit like a basement, isn't it?

If you can ask without blushing, you haven't asked for enough.

Tinned celery soup. Don't see that any more.

If you can ask without blushing, you haven’t asked for enough.

What are you planning on doing with it?

What's the basis for your request? Why are you underpaid?

So this thread isn't about some shyte sci-fi by Ian M. Banks?

Start from the top, but stay firm, you don't want to finish up in the soup…

do we care what other people are earning, or just go for the best I feel I’m happy with

What others earn is a bit pointless, you need to show you are bringing something to the party. That you add value, whether that’s pound notes to the bottom line or particular knowledge.

Anyone that has asked me for a rise because ‘X is on more’ invariably doesn’t leave with more money.

Same as I know of my peers are on more than me, but my pay rise for 2019 has been earned with results not just a want for parity.

Don’t concern yourself with what others get paid, that’s a surefire way to cap your and your colleagues income.

Find a number you’re happy with now, but more importantly happy with for years to come unless your employer is known to give higher than inflation based rises, if at all. Don’t make a big fuss of it, be confident, polite and don’t blink first.

A mate told me of his celery negotiation once. Named his price, and the interviewers said "that's more than so-and-so in their position earns!" to which he said,  "with all due respect innot talking about so-and-so, I'm talking about me". He got his requested celery.

Keep it about you.

"Kryton, my office. 0900. Monday morning."

I think there's been a leek

Lettuce think about this...will the new role involve anything beyond the normal kale of duty?

Don’t concern yourself with what others get paid, that’s a surefire way to cap your and your colleagues income

Actually the notion that everybody should keep their pay secret is a fantastic way for companies to drive down wages, the only people it benefits are the companies and confident bullshitters.

Actually the notion that everybody should keep their pay secret is a fantastic way for companies to drive down wages, the only people it benefits are the companies and confident bullshitters.

What I meant by that was don’t fall for “oh I can’t pay you X, Bob’s been here years and he’s only on Y”. Which is a typical tactic. It just doesn’t matter.

Negotiate it downsards a little in lieu of being asked to fly ?

Negotiate it downsards a little in lieu of being asked to fly ?

I was more inclined to ask for a Business Class upgrades to make my experience more bearable 😉

Thanks for the tips, I did understand the self/value issue and I wouldn’t have walked in with “yeah but he’s...”.       I’m a bit too honest with these things, I’ve no issue with demonstrating hard work in exchange for reward but often wondered whether I get taken advantage of in that respect.

I bloody hate celery ..but love Marmite .

Marmite has celery as an ingredient..

Don't worry about what "my mate" earns ...grab as many sticks as you can ..

I was more inclined to ask for a Business Class upgrades to make my experience more bearable

Don't forget to ask for a flying shoe allowance too!