[Closed] Living beyond your means...

It's fine Molgrips, honestly. I wish I'd not mentioned it now.

The mighty Doblo (copyright Harry the Spider) keeps rolling.

I'm in a much better position, mentally and financially than I have been for years and incredibly fortunate. Loving the Associate Nursing course, a genuinely wonderful thing to be involved in and it pays enough. I just wish I'd had the confidence to get into nursing years ago - but it's a bittersweet regret, I don't think I'd have appreciated it half as much as I do now. Sue is doing fine, which helps more than I can express.

Stepkids and grandkids are happy and healthy, we've just had a wonderful week in Krakow and we are debt free.

Thank you for your concern, I genuinely appreciate it, you are a lovely bloke.

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

We should define ourselves by how we treat our most vulnerable, not by the number on the back of your BMW.

Dude, you need to to rethink your definition of success.

All of us have the potential to be successful - giving everyone an equal opportunity in life would be a start.

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

"I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?"

newsflash we all go in the same size box at the end im afraid.

At least the soylent green at your successful peoples retirement home might not be people flavored 😀

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

Troll.

No previous account activity, just this one post.

Wonder who it really is?

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

I’m perfectly happy with my level of success and don’t need to feel better

but it’s pretty sad that people who earn twice what I do think they are “struggling” because, essentially, they can’t control their spending.

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

Troll.

No previous account activity, just this one post.

Wonder who it really is?

I’ve got my suspicions. They are either in one of two camps, “Obvious Troll” or “****”, or most likely both.

They are either in one of two camps, “Obvious Troll” or “****”, or most likely both.

For someone to go to the effort of creating a new account simply to say something so full of hate is clearly in a dark place themselves and are just lashing out.

they can’t control their spending.

Well, that some places are more expensive to live than others is also a point although I'm not denying yours.

Another individual I’d genuinely love to meet

However you do know that...

back of your BMW

320D MSport, plus Interior Lighting pack 😉 😀

Pfft, that's a council beemer.

Pfft, that’s a council beemer.

Sure, but anything else would exceed my £5k per month income, and mean I'd be living beyond my means 😀

Live on my own with a mortgage and try to save a little each month. Then the months that have bills like Gas, Electric, Insurance etc, I have to use savings. At the end of the year I'm about even. Just have to resist buying that Santa Cruz...

Well, that some places are more expensive to live than others is also a point although I’m not denying yours.

Sure, location will often be a factor. But if someone struggles to get by on £5k a month, it will almost never be the only factor.

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

I am successful and earn a lot, I am also very privileged.  I am the first to admit that has mostly been down to luck.  Does that mean I can make a valid point about how little you need to earn to be pivileged?

Sure, location will often be a factor. But if someone struggles to get by on £5k a month, it will almost never be the only factor.

Exactly.  Unless the cheapest property in a location is costing £3500 a month then location is not the factor.

Regardless of what you earn or are worth just remember

DON'T BE A DICK

Cheers

Actually, a bit too public

You really should eat something.
You’ll fade away to a shadow.

Exactly.  Unless the cheapest property in a location is costing £3500 a month then location is not the factor.

You're assuming I'm talking about mortgages.  You need to factor in costs of living.  Have a play with the chart here:   https://www.independent.co.uk/news/business/news/cost-of-living-the-one-chart-that-shows-why-londoners-are-the-poorest-workers-in-the-uk-a6692566.html

It may be a small-violin playing overwhelmingly titled piece, but the general context is true.  Location is a factor - live in London for example and you will have a lot less disposable income per comparable salary than somewhere cheaper.

Thank you for your concern, I genuinely appreciate it, you are a lovely bloke.

Nah it's all talk. I'd have bailed 😉

I can’t help but think a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

Ah! So you equate success in life with monetary gain then? I genuinely feel very sorry for you

Location is a factor – live in London for example and you will have a lot less disposable income per comparable salary than somewhere cheaper.

Is anyone disagreeing with that?  The point is around £5K per month not being enough to live on.  You know people live in London on a LOT less than £5k per month don't you?

Unfortunately because people can't do the maths they get attracted by the salary to work in London and not realise they will actually be worse off.  And because more and more people want to live in London the prices continue to be high so it never ends.  There are a lot of other places to live and work...

people can’t do the maths

Your posts come across very accusatory.  Perhaps people “don’t” do the maths or think to do the maths rather than “can’t”...   Does everyone research the finite cost of living before they move house...?

Oh and some people are born in London, or can’t find it easy to move out of it.   We all know its not easy to save an appropriate deposit and re-locate.

None of that changes the fact that if someone told you they were earning £5k a month and were living in London, the likelihood is they are not better off than someone earning £4k a month and living somewhere else with a much low cost of living.

My point is, earnings are not always an indicator of “being well off” I accept peoples choices on spending influence that, but you can’t tar everyone with the same brush instantly.

None of that changes the fact that if someone told you they were earning £5k a month and were living in London, the likelihood is they are not better off than someone earning £4k a month and living somewhere else with a much low cost of living.

Exactly, and £4k per month living outside of London is well off, very well of actually.  If you are earning £4k net a month (outside of London) and living beyond your means it is because you are choosing too rather than forced into it which is the point here.

£4k take home even in London is easy to do looking at the average cost of living etc.

This site has some enlightening statistics. 4 cities where the average cost of living is higher than the average income (and none of them are London unsurprisingly)! Doesn't bode well, although I don't know how that might be skewed by people living off big savings in their old age etc.

More you earn the more you spend…… It’s all relative. Though if your skint on 50k I’d look at what your frittering away. Bet it’s frightening 30quid a month on Starbucks couple of hundred on booze all adds up

This. I earn pretty good money but never had any cash left at the end of the month and when I looked at my spending it was amazing how much I wasted on stuff like buying lunches, grabbing a couple of beers, having a personal phone as well as my work phone etc. Contactless payments were my downfall because it wasn’t like spending money. I now take out a set amount of cash each month for general stuff and it makes me think a lot more about what I’m buying.

In the past I was really bad for living beyond my means and I’m still paying for it now, but it’s improving. I’ve paid my student loan off and in four years or so I should be debt free other than our mortgage and cars. I’m getting better at resisting sale stuff too (I’m a sod for buying bike gear when it’s on offer).

Cars are something that I need to look at because I sat down and properly looked st what my company car and my other half’s car costs are we’re just shy of £800 a month for a vRS and a MINI. My company car cash equivalent is now £500 a month admittedly that’s risk free because it’s maintained, insured etc but it’s a lot of money for a car that I’m not fussed by. Opting out in the spring is looking tempting and I think I’m going to try and buy, insure and run something for £350 a month. I never really thought about the cost of my car because it came out before I got paid but once your paying 40% tax on it it bloody stings.

Our mortgage is £200k and is about £740 a month

councik tax is £180 a month

food for three of us, a cat and a dog is £350 a month inc the odd take away / meal out

gas, electricity, phone, sky, BT Sports, Netflix, water is about £280

buildings and contents is £40

life and income insurance is £110

childcare is £300

the little guy costs say £100in hot lunches, swimming lessons, rugby tots, after school club

MINI costs £280 in finance and insurance

Fuel for both cars is probably £250 (mostly mine having a 60 mile round trip to the office)

We could definitely cut back if we had to and hopefully moving to a new house means that we won’t be spending so much on DIY projects / upkeep. I’m well aware that we’re pretty lucky and are above average (nice house in a nice village, two alright cars, few treats each month) but you need to step back occasionally to engage brain and realise this because it’s easy to get wrapped up in thinking that you’re skint etc.

Opting out in the spring is looking tempting and I think I’m going to try and buy, insure and run something for £350 a month.

Assuming you have some restrictions on the type of car you need to buy to 'qualify' for the cash alternative, Once you take out the ~£150 PM it's costing you just to get to work in fuel (50mpg), based on the numbers you stated, and not taking into account personal mileage/fuel etc, i'd say you have no chance.

As with most of my peers I would say I am largely 'debt-free' - apart from the mortgage!

My acid test before we commit to anything large-ticket financially is: Do we have enough savings to tide us over for six months if we both lost our jobs? If the answer would be made into a 'no' by the purchase, then it doesn't get bought.

I am totally against buying stuff on the never-never. If you haven't got the money, don't buy it.

I regard this amount of self-restraint as a kind of tax on not having to watch every penny, every day - which a lot of people do, but it doesn't seem to allow them much time to actually live their lives.

a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

hey if it wasn't for my lack of success I'd not be able to think of myself as an underachiever! I can't think what would be worse than thinking I'd somehow fulfilled my potential. Though I probably have...

Exactly, and £4k per month living outside of London is well off, very well of actually.  If you are earning £4k net a month (outside of London) and living beyond your means it is because you are choosing too rather than forced into it which is the point here.

Depends init, single earner, family of 5 (two under school age) and a horse. and it's a bit tight some times!

We'd not have the horse if we could but the old sod is too happy to put down and too knackered to loan out. Seeing as he's been part of the family for the last 14 years it's a bit rum to kick him out 😉

We shop almost exclusively at aldi, don't go out and most of my bikes are second hand 😉

and a horse

My daughter wants a horse. Curiosity had me look into how much they cost to run (given we have free access to a large field for riding/stabling) and the costs (excluding the cost of building the stable itself) were eye watering - we could get ourselves a nice new car rather than our knackered 12 yr old Mazda for the same money!

a few of those arguing so vigorously about how little you need to earn before you are ‘privileged’ are really just defending their lack of success to make themselves feel better?

The problem with measuring success in terms of earnings, is you're only a p45 away from becoming an abject failure in your own eyes.

The problem with measuring success in terms of earnings, is you’re only a p45 away from becoming an abject failure in your own eyes.

Unless you have been very successful - I have a friend that has just gone from doing well for himself but still having to look after his money to shopping at Waitrose without a care in the world, knowing he could stop work tomorrow (aged 48) and live quite comfortably.

Assuming you have some restrictions on the type of car you need to buy to ‘qualify’ for the cash alternative, Once you take out the ~£150 PM it’s costing you just to get to work in fuel (50mpg), based on the numbers you stated, and not taking into account personal mileage/fuel etc, i’d say you have no chance.

No restrictions on what we can have (yet). The cost of cars stated was just paying / insuring them. If I didn’t have my company car, I’d be close to £500 off per month before fuelling it! The cost of tax at the higher rate, loss of car allowance, contribution for a slightly nicer car plus damage waiver is a smidge under £500 plus fuel, hence the hope of running something for c.£350 before fuel to save some cash.

I am as tight as the proverbial gnat's chuff, but the one thing that has surprised me a bit on this thread is how little some people manage to spend on food. Completely disregarding any meals out (which we do very infrequently - like once a month or less), my household probably spends £250-£300 a month on food between two of us. And we both weigh less than 65kg. And I don't buy lunch or coffee out - the OH does infrequently.

It's my one extravagance really. Still, you put rubbish in, you get rubbish out...

^ We probably spend around £600 a month on food – we limit our weekly online shop to £100 but then have to buy other things on top (ie, a chicken for Sunday Dinner will be bought the day before so it's fresh and we'll inevitably buy some other bits when at the shop such as things for packed lunches, a treat for the kids for dessert etc).

but the one thing that has surprised me a bit on this thread is how little some people manage to spend on food

Same here, 80% of our shop is at Aldi and our average is still £600 a month, that includes cleaning stuff, nappies and alcohol. We do like food and far too much is spent on snacks and other 'treats'.

However, we rarely eat out or get takeaways and make our own sandwiches or have leftovers for lunch. When I worked in an office most people would spend £100 a week on lunch and coffee!

Yep, we spend around £600 per month on food too (just two of us) and that is as vegetarians so no expensive meat.  That is all from supermarket and no takeaways (they don't have takeaways where I live!)

We (2 of us) spend £170-200 a month on food from Tesco.

But we also eat out most Saturdays. Maybe even a Friday too. I've had a pub lunch today and popping into Soho later for a dinner. Maybe I should total it all up, but it's not really something that bothers me so much right now. I don't have a car so it's all the petrol I'd have to spend a month channeled into some nice experiences with others in my life.

I guess if you add my lunch every day at work (£4 - £6 a day) you'd get a more realistic picture.

Yep, we spend around £600 per month on food too (just two of us) and that is as vegetarians so no expensive meat.  That is all from supermarket

Hold tight, £600 at super markets a month?!

I'm impressed more than anything.

Hold tight, £600 at super markets a month?!

Well, Ocado - I don't actually endure having to waste time in a shop.  No money gets spent on any other food though, no takeaways, no meals out (or maybe 1 a month), take my own food to work etc,.

£600 a month without meat is quite a lot but it wouldn't be hard to hit that if you drink a bit of decent wine.

Ocado is hardly cheap anyway.

Ocado is hardly cheap anyway.

I don’t think it’s that bad. We tried using Aldi for a few weeks and didn’t save that much per shop, certainly not enough to deal with getting stuff like Heinz Beans and ketchup elsewhere. Some stuff from Aldi is really good and cheap but some stuff is poo and other stuff pricey compared to others.

We use Ocado.  My wife works around our diary for the free delivery slots.   If you take away the costs of our fuel, wear on the car, time that could be spent elsewhere then doing it that way is cheaper.

I probably live like someone with a lower income than I have because I simply can't be arsed budgeting. My mind just slides right off the topic. I'd far rather do this than drive a posher car or whatever.

Ocado is hardly cheap anyway.

No more expensive than any other supermarket, like for like.  But they sell products you can't get at the main supermarkets.  Tried the Lidl thing as a novelty for a few weeks and it seems cheap for how much you get until you realise you haven't actually got what you wanted because they don't sell it so wasn't any cheaper at all.

It could be cheaper if I compromised on the food I eat but why compromise on that if you don't have to, I enjoy eating nice food.

So spunking the best part of £10k a year on a car is considered normal?

That’s £14k gross if your a higher band tax payer.

No wonder people are living beyond their means if they're that bad at arithmetic....

I had a crazy mortgage and a lot of loans, credit cards etc. I was earning good money but was always without. I had a good job in construction but suffered badly from mental health problems, partly caused by work.

I jacked it in, sold my house in the uk, bought an old sweet house in Austria with an amazing garden. Managed to get enough from sale of uk house to buy my current house outright. I have a 7 year old 69 ps Fabia that I got for little money.

I'm now a government approved tour guide in Austria mainly doing bike or alcohol based tours - vineyards, micro breweries  along the river Danube.

I don't make much money but then again, I don't need much. My monthly outgoings are approx 350 euro all in (food, leccy etc). I've never been happier.

I had loans and credit cards in my 20's and was living a bit beyond my means so paid them all off and got rid of them so now I'm in my late 30's with no debt other than a house.

As long as I can pay the bills and feed my family I don't care about having all the other stuff like massive tv's, flash cars, the latest bikes etc. Most bigger puchases are bought by saving up or waiting until I've got the money,  I've never spent more than 2k on an everyday car, all my bikes are bought second-hand.

The missus car has done nearly 200k now and the engine is pretty tired so rather than buying a new one I'll just spend a couple hundred quid on a second hand engine and waste a day fitting it but the way I look at things doing that instead of buying another car will pretty much pay for our summer holiday next year.

Some of the amounts the higher earners are spending on things is shocking but I can understand the figures when it comes to cars. I worked out mine costs me around £300-350 a month (a big chunk of that is fuel) and the actual car is all bought and paid for. If you add another car on and double that then add even more if you're paying for it on finance/loan etc then you're soon getting on towards a grand!!

Hold tight, £600 at super markets a month?!

We probably spend over £600/month on food for two people and four cats. £100/week for basics delivered by Sainsburys and then I visit the local Coop / M&S nearly every other day buying stuff.

I had a crazy mortgage and a lot of loans, credit cards etc. I was earning good money but was always without. I had a good job in construction but suffered badly from mental health problems, partly caused by work.

I jacked it in, sold my house in the uk, bought an old sweet house in Austria with an amazing garden. Managed to get enough from sale of uk house to buy my current house outright. I have a 7 year old 69 ps Fabia that I got for little money.

I’m now a government approved tour guide in Austria mainly doing bike or alcohol based tours – vineyards, micro breweries  along the river Danube.

I don’t make much money but then again, I don’t need much. My monthly outgoings are approx 350 euro all in (food, leccy etc). I’ve never been happier

That post genuinely fills me with joy.  I’d love to see pics of you Austrian house and surroundings if your happy to share them here?

I had a crazy mortgage and a lot of loans, credit cards etc. I was earning good money but was always without. I had a good job in construction but suffered badly from mental health problems, partly caused by work.

I jacked it in, sold my house in the uk, bought an old sweet house in Austria with an amazing garden. Managed to get enough from sale of uk house to buy my current house outright. I have a 7 year old 69 ps Fabia that I got for little money.

I’m now a government approved tour guide in Austria mainly doing bike or alcohol based tours – vineyards, micro breweries  along the river Danube.

I don’t make much money but then again, I don’t need much. My monthly outgoings are approx 350 euro all in (food, leccy etc). I’ve never been happier

Your richer than most. 🙂