[Closed] Let's Talk About Bullying.

It's not the first time he's had a permanent ban, is it?

Surely if ernie (green party) and elf (blue party) have the most complaints about them by the majority (orange party) then that is democracy in action and it is just unfortunate the moderators have to take the fallout.

The forum costs me nothing to use and I rarely buy the mag, but if people complain about me that costs the mods time and eventually this time equals money as their products quality will go down.

In regards to elf, he made a really good thread on woodwork you could tell he enjoyed it and so did myself and others. I have had a brief look at what appears to be his twitter, he comes across as very angry and nasty. More posts on his interests and fewer trying to wind up other people and he'll get on fine.

I've been followed from topic to topic before

Really? If that is true, it is amazingly sad.

Which kind of highlights the futility of it all, no?

Not really this time, if (or rather when) he comes back and eventually blows his cover I'm sure the ban hammer will come down again, I can't imagine Mark will let him back after all the twitter abuse.

TJ - I think you'd actually get a better response on here if you did just report stuff to the mods when you have a problem - repeatedly making points about other members of the forum on the same (or subsequent) threads does tend to make it look like you're part of the problem rather than, as you are seeign it, the victim.

If your issues were dealt with 'offline' then a lot of, errm, chaff around you might be avoided.

The Bighitters (TM) add little value to STW as a commercial entity

It gets boring and people leave, simple as that.

Really? If that is true, it is amazingly sad.

Same thing, more or less, happened to Surf Matt. Yeah he was a bit of dick sometimes*, but he was bullied off IMHO.

*Who isn't?

Really? If that is true, it is amazingly sad.

I still have the deleted Bullheart post if anyone wants it.

I'll shut up about this now - I have made my point and I do try to listen to others.

Same thing, more or less, happened to Surf Matt. Yeah he was [s]a bit of dick sometimes*[/s] [b]AWESOME!!![/b], but he was bullied off IMHO.

FTFY

Yep, surfmatt was bullied off. It can be argued whether he bought it on himself though. I think possibly flow was more recently, but again he bought a lot of it on himself.

Yeah he was a bit of dick sometimes*

Is that more understatement or serious? 😀

I still have the deleted Bullheart post if anyone wants it.

"Bullheart" didn't come across very well in that post at all IMO. Ask him before you repost.

"Bullied off". What a weird concept. I'm sure he just thought "What a bunch of dicks" and never bothered logging on again.

KINGTUT - Member
Which kind of highlights the futility of it all, no?
Not really this time, if (or rather when) he comes back and eventually blows his cover I'm sure the ban hammer will come down again, I can't imagine Mark will let him back after all the twitter abuse.

Oh I don't know - Cressers got back in...

I still have the deleted Bullheart post if anyone wants it.

Nealglover@gmail.com

Thanks !

Surf-mat wasn't bullied off, that's ridiculous. He repeatedly made a dick of himself, got himself a rep for making a dick of himself, continued to make a dick of himself and then flounced off. I've no doubt at all that he's out there somewhere continuing to make a dick of himself.

That's not bullying.

[img] [/img]

[i]Cressers got back in... [/i]

did he who as, if it's not a current user?

I do sometimes wonder how he's doing - his eyesite seemed to be deteriorating but I hoped he'd be able to carry on riding somehow.

Surf-mat wasn't bullied off, that's ridiculous. He repeatedly made a dick of himself, got himself a rep for making a dick of himself, continued to make a dick of himself and then flounced off. I've no doubt at all that he's out there somewhere continuing to make a dick of himself.

He was too! Stop oppressing me!

* furiously hit's all the report buttons*

I don't subscribe to that twitter thing it all seems fairly pointless, but this lead me to seek out the players and it seems significant that @Elfinsafety follows no one yet expects all to listen to his rants which kind of sums it up really.

And for someone of his undoubted intelligence and internet capability with the tools around there's no stopping him returning, hearing of that LOIC thing made me chuckle, to retaliate by bringing the forum down...

But all this angst over the removal of an anonymous ID, he should just return as a woman for a while, they'd never guess...

🙂

<sets up twitter account>

The management were more like the bloody Men In Black last night; some very swift erasing of 'the truth'. That's actually a very disturbing trait.

this is more interesting. what happened?

EDIT -
*realises any post saying what happened will be removed*
email in profile 😉

I think its more about not wanting to run off bleating to the mods but to try and deal with it on the forum or to ignore it.

Certainly in future I will be much quicker to report posts and posters that I consider abusive and I urge others to do so as well.

Two things:

1) People may not have the same perplexing low tolerance of 'abuse' you have

2) I call it perplexing, because your standard method of discussion is robust to say the least (although admittedly you very rarely verge beyond tacky stereotypes such as 'little englander' in terms of text that is actually offensive). I think it's this 'robustness', intentional or not, that attracts you as much flack as you seem to get.

Curiously, the only time I've received a warning or a ban was for calling you an idiot TJ, for not seeing your own hypocrisy on a tedious thread about nuclear power. I don't care, but I doubt anyone other than you would have reported that...

Shut up binners life is about THIS HERE FORUM! and you know it! 🙂

The discussion about surfmatt he shows the differnce of opinion on this.

I thought he was bullied.

Others think he brought it on himself ( IMO the classic blame the victim)

Others think he was a dick and flounced

This cannot be reconciled really but does illustrate the difficulties in reaching a consensus on what online behaviour is acceptable

slightly off topic but ive noticed whatever you post buying, selling or just asking for info there are hundreds of nobs on here that take the pish and make stupid, sarcastic comments for there own entertainment so to say people are being bullied is daft. if they are dicks as said above get rid. read through alot of posts for examples of idiots. i go on a few forums and tbh this one and one other are by far the worst for cretins and stupid comments to simple questions or points of view from individuals. thats my tuppence worth. also if you dont like whats said dont read it. not bullying then is it as they are just cyber dicks who prob in the real world live with there mums at the ages of 40+ and are still virgins. this gives them the right to give people a hard time via a keyboard not.

I never contributed to the Bullheart thread, the constructive comment I could have made would have no doubt resulted in a mass of complaints from the hand wringers and a ban. Ernie has a point. I've given up stating the obvious when pepole rant about their private lives blaming everyone but themselves.

wwaswas -

"ohnohesback"

surf mat was a dick and he did bring it on himslef by hios personallity and how he acted on here.

Thanks for letting me know I am blaiming the victim by disagreeing with you TJ..you really cant help yourself here can you
I find it offensive that you still need to belittle those who disagree with you

EDIT: Sorry TJ I am not intentionally trying to have ago at you but it may appear like this as I keep doing this Sorry

zokes

I think it's this 'robustness', intentional or not, that attracts you as much flack as you seem to get.

I fully accept that which is why in the past I have not complained at abuse directed at me much. However as it appears to be the volume of complaints that gets people banned I will more now. the same people that rip into me rip into others as well

I doubt anyone other than you would have reported that...

don't remember doing so but its possible I guess.

[img] [/img]

Apart from his irritating posts I can't remember why cressers got banned, what was it?

Mr Woppit, ah thank you, although I would have guessed if I'd seen this on the profile;

[i]About Me professional pessimist [/i]

😉

kingtut - 'disagreeing with Mark' in the end I think. Wasn't he putting comments on home page articles or something and wouldn't stop?

How can you be bullied on the internet?

surf mat was a dick and he did bring it on himslef by hios personallity and how he acted on here.

Surf-mat wasn't bullied off, that's ridiculous. He repeatedly made a dick of himself, got himself a rep for making a dick of himself, continued to make a dick of himself and then flounced off. I've no doubt at all that he's out there somewhere continuing to make a dick of himself.

Well, I only really engaged with him in the running threads, so I guess I didn't see him in full dickish mode...I assume these would have been the car threads?

Anyway. I retract my earlier point.

Junkyard - Member

surf mat was a dick and he did bring it on himslef by hios personallity and how he acted on here.

Thanks for letting me know I am blaiming the victim by disagreeing with you TJ..you really cant help yourself here can you
I find it offensive that you still need to belittle those who disagree with you

I did put [b]IMO[/b]. I had no intent to belittle those who disagree with me. I was intending to outline the irreconcilable difference in opinion / attitude as shown by the attitudes to Surffmatt displayed. I made no value judgement on them nor did I see you post on this.

Accept my apologies please.

Apart from his irritating posts I can't remember why cressers got banned, what was it?

Being rude to Chipps, as I recall. We were all treated to a short video of the sliced-potato one's immensly attractive rear-end...

"How can you be bullied on the internet?"

The internet can be used in many ways as a form of communication. Therefore it can be used quite easily for bullying.

Now give me your lunch money by palpal gift or I'll tweet something about your mum.

I'm always slightly bemused when stuff kicks off on here. The handbags at dawn and shenanigans makes me feel young again - as in "I'm a 13 year old girl in high school". And they say [i]women [/i]are bitchy!

What ever people may & may not feel/think about Elf there is no need for this sort of thing

Taken from his Twitter feed - Ah well, Kept them busy tonight! Does anyone know why Mark Alker no longer teaches children? I think we should be told....

Stepping over the line that one.

Who was it that took banter with a female STW'er the completely wrong way and sent naked/explicit pics of himself to her via email?

was 42 hora, wasn't it?

Yes, it was. Talk about being awkward with the opposite sex

If I sent naked pics to any STW females they'd send me back a subscription to weigh****chers 😆

I'm always slightly bemused when stuff kicks off on here. The handbags at dawn and shenanigans makes me feel young again - as in "I'm a 13 year old girl in high school". And they say women are bitchy!

C'mon. Compared to mumsnet, STW is the equivalent of being beaten to death with a marshmallow.

If I sent naked pics to any STW females they'd send me back a subscription to weigh****chers

"How can you be bullied on the internet?"

Quite easily. I'm a senior safeguarding officer for a very large further education college and I get hundreds of reports of cyber-bullying across my desk every year. Some get actioned, some don't. All get investigated. I've seen pretty much nothing on here that would concern me if I was at work.

Adults + anonymity + limited comms + alcohol/drugs/unhappiness etc = delicate egos

TandemJeremy - Member
I'll shut up about this now - I have made my point and I do try to listen to others.

You should have started a couple of pages earlier:

Pook - Member
As folks gave said, bullying can take many forms. Dominating discourse to the exclusion of others, by only engaging in conversation with certain members to the exclusion of others' quite valid contributions is one form - like 'cool kids' groups at school who laugh at the new kid.

Funny how appropriate that example feels.

The so called 'big-hitters', in my opinion, simply don't see how their domination of threads excludes others.

It's become quite tiresome really and has put me (and I assume others) off the site. Not good for advertising revenues and I suspect one of the reasons for his banning.

Funnily enough, that tedious domination of a thread is again happening here.

muddydwarf

It really does put you off posting, i for one am sick of finding a potentially interesting thread - where i might learn something - taken over and ruined yet again by the over inflated ego's of the same old posters.
Elfinfred wasn't/isn't some sort of 'warrior against pomposity' as some claim, he was/is an ego driven cretin who's main purpose was to annoy and upset other people.

Nail on head for me, and I think I was pretty much on the same wavelength as elf in terms of politics etc.

[b]senior[/b] safeguarding officer

Get you girlfriend 😉

thesouthernfairy - Member
What ever people may & may not feel/think about Elf there is no need for this sort of thing

Taken from his Twitter feed - Ah well, Kept them busy tonight! Does anyone know why Mark Alker no longer teaches children? I think we should be told....

Yep. Can't defend that. Not forgiveable. We might see the ban stick, this time.

It will, however, be a sad loss to the use of emoticons and pretend Cockerneee...

Who was it that took banter with a female STW'er the completely wrong way and sent naked/explicit pics of himself to her via email?

😯 Please tell me this is true? Who?

C'mon. Compared to mumsnet, STW is the equivalent of being beaten to death with a marshmallow.

Actually, I've said it before, but STW is one of the nicest forums I visit. The recent drama here is fairly rare, on a lot of boards you get it pretty much every other thread, day in, day out. I think that's why it's more bizarre when it does kick off.

Get you girlfriend

Yeah ok, only put that bit in cos we've got around 40 designated officers who pass stuff on to me after initial assessment. Stop bullying me right!

And they say women are bitchy!

SEXIST!

[img] [/img]

What's wrong with being sexy?

[img] [/img]

*Virtually wedgies everyone else in this thread*

Grrrrrrrrr. Dinner money tomorrow or I'll give you a non-specific ethnic minority burn!

For god's sake hora, stop bullying youself!!!

My first rule in life is never take yourself too seriously. My second is to understand when you are wrong and to be man enough to apologise. 8)

Please tell me this is true? Who?

A few years ago but the bloke had a normal conversation on a topic with a female STW'er. He then made a mental long leap and emailed her pics. It was a kind of a 'where did that come from/you've got the wrong end of the stick'.

On a more important level you tend to woo someone first, arrange a date. NOT send hardcore pics as the next step..

Edukator - Member
I never contributed to the Bullheart thread, the constructive comment I could have made would have no doubt resulted in a mass of complaints from the hand wringers and a ban. Ernie has a point. I've given up stating the obvious when pepole rant about their private lives blaming everyone but themselves.

So the reality it could be argued here, that more often than not it's the mods that are the bully.

Supression of free speech that at one time folk died to protect the right for..

So in the end the result will be a forum of a particular view, held by a narrow minded interest group and will in due course wither, if taken to a logical conclusion, whereas normally forums flourish for precisely diversity of opinion and controversy...

On a more important level you tend to woo someone first, arrange a date. NOT send hardcore pics as the next step..

On a more important level you tend to woo someone first, arrange a date. NOT send hardcore pics as the next step..

On a more important level you tend to woo someone first, arrange a date. NOT send hardcore pics as the next step.

Look hora, I've said I was sorry. To be fair though, you did lead me on a bit.

Oh FFS derekrides free speech being curtailed? Get a grip.

I thought the constant pics you send me of your man-veg [i]were[/i] the woo-ing! What a frightful faux pas 😳

'where did that come from/you've got the wrong end of the stick'.

Fnarr, fnarrr...

A few years ago but the bloke had a normal conversation on a topic with a female STW'er. He then made a mental long leap and emailed her pics. It was a kind of a 'where did that come from/you've got the wrong end of the stick'.

Blimey! I missed that sounds better than that thread with that badger guy and the latex tubeless explosion!

you've got the wrong end of the stick

Tails - How do you know that thread didn't involve a latex tubeless explosion as well! 😉

Quite easily. I'm a senior safeguarding officer for a very large further education college and I get hundreds of reports of cyber-bullying across my desk every year.

Yeah but, no but, I get that, Kids can bully by text and internet as they have to go to college / school with the people and this is just extending stuff to online.

Or do you deal with bullying cases where neither party know each other or any of their peers? (so it's purely online - genuinely interested)

My point is, on STW most people don't have to socially interact face to face or with peers so if you get bullied switch off (walk away) ignore or get a new user name and re-invent yourself

Or do you deal with bullying cases where neither party know each other or any their peers so it's purely online? (genuinely interested)

Bullying by it's nature usually takes place between people who have 'some' knowledge of each other, not always in RL. Generally we get very few cases of 'bullying' on the forums that we run, most young people just ignore stupid comments. A lesson there perhaps.

Edit: it might be worth my saying that IME the overwhelming majority of reports I get about bullying on forums and message boards are down to interpretation and frequently the reporter has more 'baggage' than the person they are reporting.

Tails - How do you know that thread didn't involve a latex tubeless explosion as well!

So so wrong I've got a good mind to report you!

So so wrong I've got a good mind to report you!

I would jump straight to legal action.

His twitter feed is very enlightening - true colours showing through or a drunk chap whose venting as he had his toys taken away? Hopefully the latter

Woppit - i think you are dead right, he couldn't help it. where you say personality quirk i say disorder though.

So i can understand why he was given multiple chances. it's clear this forum is the most important thing in his life, but it had long passed the point where we could be expected to be his care workrrs.

I feel I'm being over-bantered. I'm off to the UN commission for human Rights. Just in case

true colours showing through or a drunk chap whose venting as he had his toys taken away? Hopefully the latter

He's an adult who is nearly 40 years old. If that's his 'drunk chap venting', then I'd say it reflects very much on his true colours.

When I'm drunk I tend to be introspective or quite randy. Not angry.

The Internet is the perfect playground for bullies and does need to be "policed" accordingly. There are people who are genuinely bullied and as I hinted before there are bullies who hide behind a curtain of being bullied themselves, on here as in all walks of life.

Bullies tend to prefer sledgehammers to rapiers, are relatively immune to humour and mild ribbing, and burst with a loud noise or a prolonged squeal when their balloons are inevitably burst.

Whatever their religious persuasion, perhaps the people who's habits tend towards bullying should think about the most important lesson that the Christian church teaches: Mark 12:31 before posting. I am sure there are also plenty of secular texts that say the same thing.

Do they talk about internet bullying in the bible? Blimey!

Was there any reference in the book of Revelations about photos of Hora's cobblers?

Deuteronomy, 23:1

[i]No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the LORD[/i]

😀

Nice one binners!

The biblical reference was real and tongue in cheek at the same time!!! If that is possible?