Just fed-up? or is it more? – Page 3 – Chat Forum

neilnevill · 2011-05-08T15:01:43Z

I think I'm just really fed-up. I don't feel utterly awful and unable to have any fun as I have once before when mildly depressed, but I am feeling a bit nervous as I'm so fed-up and seem to be in a bit of a spiral. So I'm after ideas please, something to put a smile on my face before conversations with the GP become necessary. Basically after moving to London 3+ years ago I don't seem to have made many, or even any, friends and am getting incredibly bored :( The boredom is the root of my fed-up feeling. If I'm not bored then I'm happy, but right now I'm bored, I seem to have no social life at all and feel a creeping lethargy starting...I don't have anyhting to do, feel bored, but if I do get an offer of something then it doesn't appeal or I have good reason not to try it, so I stay bored. I've tried and tried...perhaps I've tried too hard at times... I work in central london and get on well with work collegues, would call a good number of them friends, but only at work. Although 1 or 2 will come out after work for a drink it doesn't go past that, I don't get invites for any weekend social stuff, and when I've invited them for BBQ or a curry or a dinner party no-one comes. I put that down to London and the distances that everyone travels to the office/lives apart. Like most people on here (probably) at heart I'm an outdoor and active sort, but I've strugled to find any regular mb'ing partners. Nearest place to ride for me is Dorking/north downs or also Swinley....much prefer th North Downs as a riding area. I've tagged along on a few stw rides at swinley...actually I've started the threads and arranged them now I think of it, had a fun time but never seem to manage to get anything regular going and it becomes a drag trying to get people out all the time. For North Downs riding I used to go and tag along with rides from the Nirvana shop in westcott....I'm sure anyone that has done this will understand when I say I found the shop owner and some of the regulars not as welcoming and friendly as I'd have liked. Although a good few of the other riders were friendly and I often had a fun ride I again, ddn't make any 'friends' and it never became a regular thing for me. Last year, being a bit fed-up with lack off-road riding buddies, and because I fancied something different, I got much more into climbing and had a pretty good year. Met lots of new people, thought of a few of them as friendships formed, would climb indoors 2 or 3 eves a week and then drive myself and a car load of friends off to places at the weekend to climb. Good fun. The present problem came though when I took a nasty whipper (about an 8m fall) back in November and badly sprained my ankle. 6 months on I still can't do anything much at all on my ankle. Can't mtb, can't climb, can't run, even standing at the pub for a few hours makes it pretty sore. I've spent loads on physio and a private ortho consultaton to speed the NHS up, currently waiting for an mri in 10 days to determine how to treat the problem....could be lookng at surgery. In the mean time my usual active past-times have had to cease. I've also come to realise that the friends I'd made aren't so interested when I can't go climbing, and perhaps when I'm not providing the car/transport for their weekends away? Partly understandable...they can have fun climibng and I can't, but it has got annoying that a good number seem to have severed any links with me....don't reply to texts or emails about going for a drink etc. and go out without inviting me. I've tried hard to ensure I'm not 'trying too hard', I don't ask people to do stuff any more than abut once a month...but I still worry I've scared some off. Anyway. the result is that I've been totally and utterly bored and done nothing but mope about at the weekend for months :? I can't do any of my usual sporting activities and the ankle seems to stop me trying most new sports or activities in an attempt to meet people(for example I can't try salsa dancing or the like). I guess I need to find a non-active past time, for a while at least. I've thought briefly about some kind of night classes but I use my brain at work and prefer to relax it not tax it socially...and I assume this is not a good time of year for course/classes to start. Maybe something creative, but not thought of what....pottery or painting doesn't appeal :? I've started thinking about moving house. Move away from London...kind of seems drastic and kind of seems like running away and not facing up and dealing with trouble. Also, with the economy right now...leaving a good job to move out of London just hopng to find a social group/environment I fit into seems absurdly risky. So. Anybody got any ideas for lifting the duldrums? :-)

flip

Posts: 0

Free Member

How about joining the ranks of the photographers?

Yes plenty of other hobbies about, i just don't seem to have enough hrs in the day.

Maybe it's that London and maybe re locate?

Chin up fella 😉

Posted : 15/10/2011 6:19 pm

derekrides

Posts: 0

Free Member

I don't think I've ever read such a diatribe of slefish self centred drivel in all my forum adventures.

Dude you want to stop expecting people to do things for you and try helping them with their issues, I hate to think what you did to piss the girl off. Expecting everyone around you to come to you, to pay attention to you all the damned time, life aint like that.

You want to take serious stock of how lucky you are, you need to take a trip to Africa..

I've got to go elsewhere now, but I'll be back with more advice shortly, before you end up topping yourself.

Posted : 15/10/2011 6:39 pm

singletrackmind

Posts: 7278

Full Member

**** Off Derek
Your about as helpfull as a sh1t in a kettle
I read alot of your posts , they are nasty and ,in the most part spiteful.

Posted : 15/10/2011 7:39 pm

Elfinsafety

Posts: 0

Free Member

Neil; there'll hopefully be a London Pootle with me and Bullheart soon. I'll badger the useless lazy excuse-making bugger into sorting something out. Today wooduv bin perfect actually; warm, sunny, dry.

We'll sort something out soon. Bikey, London and then food and beer! What could possibly be better??? 😀

Posted : 15/10/2011 7:59 pm

neilnevill

Posts: 5797

Free Member

Topic starter

Cheers Az

Posted : 15/10/2011 8:24 pm

cinnamon_girl

Posts: 17843

Never underestimate how much we take good health for granted. It must be extremely frustrating for you, being unable to climb as you obviously enjoy it immensely.

A London Pootle sounds the way to go, just nag them to get it organised!

Good luck. 🙂

Posted : 15/10/2011 8:30 pm

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[Closed] Just fed-up? or is it more?