[Closed] Favourite Simpson's quotes?

"Scum freezbag!"

Moe: "Power off Einstein" when he brains Homer with a plank

Two of my favourites in one scene.

Marge: Have you noticed any change in Bart?

Homer: New glasses?

Marge: No...he looks like something might be disturbing him.

Homer: Probably misses his old glasses.

Marge: I guess we could get more involved in Bart's activities, but then I'd be afraid of smothering him.

Homer: Yeah, and then we'd get the chair.

Marge: That's not what I meant.

Homer: It was, Marge, admit it.

Homer reads "Uruguay"

Laughs. " U R Gay"

Save me jeebus

homer answers door in nothing buta brown paper bag.
"I seem to have misplaced my pants"

Almost Simpsons:

Captain Zapp Brannigan: Captain's journal. Stardate: uhhh...
Kif Kroker: [sigh] April 13.
Captain Zapp Brannigan: April 13... point two.

And my favourite:

Captain Zapp Brannigan: As you know, the key to victory is the element of surprise. Surprise!
[pushes button, bay doors open under soldiers]

Homer: What's the problem here?
Lisa: We were fighting over which one of us loves you more.
Homer: You were? Aww... Go ahead.
Bart: You love him more.
Lisa: No, you do!
Bart: No I don't!
Lisa: Yes you do!

This thread really made me laugh this morning 🙂

When asked if he's going bowling...

"

Very useful when "mystery" packages arrive, or you get caught sneaking out in your riding clothes!

Mr Burns - "Boweling?!"

Inspector going in to Moes "Man alive! There's Men alive in here"

And from the same episode:

Bart: I can't help but feel partly responsible

and

Homer: Dear baby, welcome to dumpville, population, you.

If you're happy and you know it, say a swear. Ralph: Mitten.

 

About 1.20 when describing 'the boy'. Always make me larf.

Susie - Member

Bart: I can't help but feel partly responsible

I use that all the time 😆

Lisa. "This is the worst day of my life".

Homer. "No Lisa, this is the worst day of your life [i]so far[/i]".

Guatemalan insanity peppers

Homer and Lisa walk into a New Age shop...

"do you have something to stop my daughter complaining?"
"What's keeping Joan Rivers alive these days? Fetal grindings."

A different episode:

Willie (startled by seeing Homer and Bart): Eee! I mean Aah! I mean... what are you doing here?!

Homer: Umm... we're.. foreign exchange students from... Scotland.

Willie: I'm from Scotland! Where do ya hail from?

Homer: Uh, North... Kilt-town.

Willie: No foolin'? I'm from North Kilttown! Do ya know Angus McLeod?

Homer: Wait a minute! There's no Angus McLeod in North Kilttown! You're not from Scotland at all!

Willie: Ah, don't be daft. I was born and raised in... [notices the vacuum sucking up the grease] MY RETIREMENT GREASE! NOOOOOOOOO!

Embiggen is a perfectly cromulent word.

Masterpiece.

The Springfield civil War re-enactment society announcer:
'The civil war was fought in Springfield between the North, the South and the West to be in, out and next to the union'.

Mr. Burns: I should be resisting this, but I'm paralyzed with rage... and island rhythms.

@coogan.

The new woman at work episode as to be the best Simpsons one ever !

Homer:

"Oh yeah, drugs, you gotta have drugs"

The family car hits a deer

Homer : Doh

Lisa : A deer

Marge : A female deer

Professor Drink has some good ones:

"Stupid machine, oh wait a minute, this isn't the Monsterometer, it's the Frog-Exaggerator Mm-hai."

"- Brace yourselves gentlemen, according to the gas chromatograph, the secret ingredient is...LOVE?!?! Who's been screwing with this thing?"

Agent: Now, when I say, "Hello, Mr. Thompson," and press down on your foot, you smile and nod.
Homer: No problem.
Agent: Hello, Mr. Thompson!
Homer: (stares blankly; to other agent) I think he's talking to you.

A bit of a long one but brilliant.

That should be Frink in my post above, by the way.

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A bit of a long one but brilliant.

TBH, most of the Cape Feare episode is quotable. The rake scene doesn't particularly lend itself to quotes, but I had to pause the episode the first time I watched it because I was crying with laughter.

Ahhhh, the rake scene: That deserves to go down in comedy folklore. I quite like the way they often referred back to it later episodes when Sideshow Bob appears.

Came about because they had to pad out a short episode, I believe. But yes, it's a masterpiece of comic timing.

Chief Wiggum - 'Just make sure you get one of those inflatable women, because this one time I, er......'

Dr Nick 'the part I like best is when he pays me the money'.

Homer - Don't worry Lisa, being eaten by an alligator is just like going to sleep. In a giant blender

Lisa: Are those rabbits dead?
Marge: No, they're just sleeping. Upside down... and inside out.