Forum menu
A quick scan through reveals TJ's as being good advice...
If you are being made redundant and in danger off losing the house get some good money advice - in 99% of cases house repossession can be avoided if you take the right steps.You sound possibly depressed to me - go get pro help. GP first port of call, counselling can really help as well
When you are redundant get out on your bike! Exercise is the best thing for what ails you
You either stop seeing her now, except for children matters, or you BOTH commit to some relationship councelling. If not then move on mate. Treat yourself to a healing period. Just you. Dont fret on finding a replacement. Do your thing for a while. Get your head straight. Get used to being you, & being happy with your lot. As for moving on, you need to be free of all this stuff first. No women is going to want some sob story. You dont sound thick, you've obviously got a lot to offer someone. But stalking her isnt going to get you there. Take advice & you'll be in a far better place soon enough. Drag your ass up Cannock of you fancy a day out riding somewhere different.
Agree with the sensible comments. Stop all the extraneous chat. Play it cool and move on. At the moment she will be getting satisfaction from the idea that you will be there as a safety net for her. And you may even take some comfort from that. However, it sounds as though she is more ready to move on than and when that happens, you'll be dropped rapidly. Better for you to tske control and chose the moment when that break occurs and to make that break yourself. No need for an announcement, just minimise your facebook and internet contact. Get online and flirt with other women, you obviously have the knack.
I think i have fell in to a Jeremy Kyle episode by mistake?
I haven't read all of page 2 and 3, but this sounds gutt-wrenchingly awful. Stop torturing yourself man! Delete all the FB accounts, cancel the broadband for a month or two, and concentrate your energies on yourself and your own life (and the kids, obviously) for a little while. She's playing you like a ball, by the sounds of it.
Sympathy, and good luck.
I almost hope this is just some cynical social experiment and that Curly68 is happily sat in a lab using us as test-specimens, but if not...get yourself to Shelter (the housing charity), it wont stop your issues with your ex but they may be able to remove the threat of repossession, the sooner you act the more they can do for you.
Your nearest appears to be:
Ground Floor Tudor House, 13 East Stockwell Street, Colchester, CO1 1SS.
Phone: 0344 515 1860, 0800 085 1798 freephone
Its not an experiment though I wish it was! Just phoned Shelter and someone will be calling back this afternoon, so thank you for that.
You need to seriously stop using Facebook, MSN, texting and the such as they are really not healthy. These things are really not good for talking to someone as feelings and what people really mean don't always come across correctly. You also end up wondering why you haven't got an instant reply and trying to work out the meanings in words. As you see her often I would just sit her down and say things aren't working for you and are screwing you up. Lay down the law in nice way and say things have to change to keep you healthy. If she cares then she will be willing to change your setup. If she doesn't care then she will kick of and refuse to change, but at least you will have an answer. Cool to hear that you are getting help as I have always found that talking to the professionals does always really help. Suddenly you realise you are not alone and things can change.
Good luck. Keep us in the picture. If one thing this has hopefully shown you've plenty of friends here if you need a chat 🙂
Saw this thread this morning, chin up lad and the very best of luck.
There is some good advise here from very well intentioned folk, just hope it all works out for you.
This is how it is mate; She doesn't want you but she doesn't want to lose her hold over you. The only reason you're still getting a "sniff" is because she hasn't found anyone else and it's doing her ego good to think that someone wants her. Sorry buddy, you need to detatch yourself from this woman now. Then she'll also be feeling the insecurities that you are.