So to cut a long story short the better half got diagnosed with terminal cancer in summer after prolonged back ache and we have some time. She is getting help through Mac Millan and local hospice and eldest daughter is getting help through uni. Youngest girls are just amazing. All the girls are racing/training so keeping them occupied. My problem is with bloody Covid is that I cant get for a coffee or pint with mates and don't want to speak to a random over the phone. Does anyone know of support sites/forums for partners dealing with this. In a state of coping but just bubbling under the surface with feelings of guilt thinking of future. I am worried that after the focus of Xmas and my 50th will be a bit lost. Have nearly done fifty 50kms before my birthday as a challenge and to raise money for local hospice but again without this focus worry about my head. On a real positive we are going to have the most amazing Christmas and self isolated so we can have family over!
Thanks STW.
My thoughts go out to you, MrsD had breast cancer 6 years ago but thankfully survived.
Have you tried McMillan?
Or ‘sod that, go for a bike ride with mates & just happen to pass a takeaway cafe kind of place’
Been doing loads of Zwift and riding with kids which is good for us all. Am going to try Mac Millan eventually but not 100% sure. Mates who I ride with live in different tier. Also avoiding too many people as older parents coming for Xmas!!
It depends if they have a centre near you (although I’ve heard they are doing some stuff on line) but this is exactly what Maggies Centres are there for.
Sorry to hear that mate. Can't offer advice but if you're near Oxford I can offer beer and a pizza.
John
McMillan and the local Hospice will almost certainly have stuff available for you/families/relatives, not just your Partner. Try and engage if you can. It's too easy to put yourself down as a lower priority, but you need to look after yourself too.
McMillan - Support for relatives
Marie Curie - Support for relatives
There are often support groups for specific types of cancer. If you know the specifics, then they may be of help. In my case there is/was;
Google is both your friend and your enemy so take care tracking info down.
All the best.
Really sorry to hear this, nothing constructive to add sorry. But if you're ever near Congleton a pint/coffee/warm welcome are yours....
Bloody hell, sorry to hear this!
Don't ever worry about sharing on here... EVER! Throughout my near 20yrs on this forum, one thing has always run true, and that is people coming together in the support for those struggling with the Big C... Tyres, suspension travel, where to ride etc. will forever cause big arguments and divide opinion, but Cancer is a great unifier FWIW...
Just over 2 years in remission here with my GF. Been hard during COVID cos her support network has basically disappeared, but at least we have her health to thank for!
Lost my Mum 26 years ago though. Was tough, I was 14, didn't know how to cope really. Friends helped, as did immersing myself in my hobbies.
My Dad's GF runs the fundraising for a local chapter of Maggies, by all accounts she does a superb job of it. No experience myself, but hear they do great things for those who really need the help with coping.
Cheers everyone and just what I needed. Just to be able to speak online helps and hearing other journeys.
There are jus so many things that go round in my head that whilst being string for the family I can't share.
In turns of specifics she has breast cancer with secondary widespread bone cancer. One thing I will say is please get lumps, bumps and anything different checked. Everyone including doctors, paramedics etc all thought it was a strain. Push to get double checked however scary.
Thanks everyone!
My thoughts are with you and yours. You sound like a fantastic person, husband, father, and I wish you all the best for your Christmas plans.
I hate the randomness of cancer.
Hey man, so sorry to hear this. Try and keep riding.
For non riding buddies try dragging them out for long walks.
We had a terrifying relationship with Cancer in our eldest when he was 14. So I can imagine...
We were left to our own devices, so I know you have to properly seek out help.
It is the shock of cancer that is worst. We went from having a great time in lockdown and looking forward to so many adventures to a true nightmare. We are all just going through in disbelief but Christmas has been a real focus and we just need to find other ones. The twins racing next year will help with a new camper van I am converting, if I get my arse in gear!! That means some road trips and more importantly somewhere comfortable and warm for the better half to rest on days out.
Really sorry to hear this, nothing constructive to add sorry. But if you’re ever near Congleton a pint/coffee/warm welcome are yours….
I echo what Tom says and if you are near here I’m just down the road in Macclesfield. Keep posting on here as this place is a great community and you’ll get help and support from a lot of people.
Thanks for all the offers but down in Plymouth. Hopefully after a family Xmas which involves isolating before will be able to get out.