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I'm a reformed Biscuiteer.
My Dad worked for Trebor when i was a kid and after a stint with Philip Morris (!) went to United Biscuits for the rest of his career. I was subjected to endless badly hidden stashes of factory seconds of all types of biscuits, cakes and intermediary products (yes, you know the ones).
Anyway, i'm here to explain that there is a chronological/intellectual hierarchy of British biscuits:
For the young and the simpletons there are (in order of youth and simpleness
-pink wafers
-custard creams (it's not creme - there's nothing fancy about them)
- bourbons
For the old and infirm, there are
- Rich Tea
- Rich Tea
- Rich Tea
- Plain Digestive (with Horlicks)
- nice
For those inbetween, but with impeccable taste and high IQ there are:
- Chocolate Hob Nobs
- Chocolate digestives
- Hob Nobs
- Ginger Nuts
- Chocolate Ginger Nuts (it's been a while if they don't exist, they should)
- Club
- Fig Rolls
For those that have lost their taste due to COVID19 and so it doesn't really matter
- Oreos
And who remembers this website? 14 years since it was updated!
http://www.nicecupofteaandasitdown.com/
And it has a key too:
http://www.nicecupofteaandasitdown.com/biscuits/index.php3
Oreos are nice. Chocolate covered more so.
Just discovered Biscoff Creams
Perilous yet manageable, I feel.
Luckily also discovered Nairns Stem Ginger Oat, which have a number of benefits (at least for my weak will)
- Less sugar
- Robust
- Satisfying
- Very tasty
- Expensive (so I eat less of them)
Milk Choc Homewheat OTOH are basically a Class A drug. That much salt and sugar is inhalable.
Oreos are nice.
If you like flavourless lumps of sugar + fat, I guess. Not something anyone in their right mind would choose if custard creams or bourbons were available, though. Or pretty much any other biscuit.
If you like flavourless lumps of sugar + fat,
What's your point, caller?
It's a shame this thread came about before TOTW... unless its recent revival qualifies it?
I’ve so far avoided passion fruit Jaffa cakes, but they are down to 60p a box so thought I’d try them
🤮
Has to be a TOTW.
In defence of Chocolate Bourbons, my children used to manage one every 2-3 miles on the back of the kiddyback tandem. Useful dry chocolate flavoured energy. I did try real chocolate biscuits once and soon reverted. They do have their place. Fig rolls FTW.
Ginger Nuts have been noticeable by the absence in the Inverness Aldi for the past couple of weeks.
I hope this isn’t the start of an impending Ginger Nut supply crises.
Interesting, been none in Ilkeston or Long Eaton this week, prompting a crisis at my parents house.
Nairns Stem Ginger Oat
Health food. Not saying they're not ace, but you're never reaching the "I really shouldn't eat any more of these" point with them, are you?
Chocolate Ginger Nuts would be gilding the lily.
Now these on the other hand:
Picked up at Innerleithen co-op the other week and more or less demolished by the time we got home. I seldom approve of messing with a stalwart of the biscuit world, but they were flippin great. Could only be improved by darkening the chocolate and doubling the pack size.
Fox's Golden Crunch Creams > Custard Creams
Prove me wrong...
There will always be a home for toffypops.
Mmmm, biscuits. Finally finished off Christmas hamper stuff this weekend so was in the biscuit aisle in the supermarket. No sign of either lemon puffs or Abernethy, haven't seen either for ages. Is this just an Asda/Morrisons issue or should I venture upmarket?
2 hours I’ve sat with an open box of Jaffa cakes beside me, aside from that one cake they remain untouched
Any packet of biscuits once opened must be consumed, this is unheard of
Mmm toffypops, haven’t had them in years. Could do with a pack to get me over this Jaffa cake debacle
In defence of Chocolate Bourbons
Is there any other kind?
prompting a crisis at my parents house
Gingernuts/snaps are insanely easy to make and massively lovely when homebaked.
Anzac biscuits, look them up, make a batch, join the chub club thread as you'll be needing it!
Those gingerbread digestives - they did mince pie ones too before Xmas. Used them to make s'mores with the Cubs. They don't know they're born.
Anzac biscuits aren't the same as ginger nuts! Are you mad! A similar base maybe, but they're all about the coconut.
... However, as biscuit inspired beer goes, 10 years ago a Queensland brewery made an amazing beer that tasted of Anzac biscuits - Fanny Gertrude's Bickie Beer. It was spectacular.
Are you mad!
About biscuits, yes. Sorry, these were 2 different biscuit plans, they are very much not the same, both easy to make though 🙂
Today’s (non) biscuit disappointment is caramelised biscuit kitkat. I thought a kitkat tasting of biscoff would be nice, these sadly taste nothing like them
These are something of a weakness.
Edit: As is the ability to easily post images on this forum.