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Put your back out trying to learn to flat land manual..... ouch!
#tricksforkids
Up there with falling off while sprinting like its the top of DH track, keeping up wiv da kids....
Do yourself an injury simply by removing the bike from the shed or placing it back in there.
... have t-shirts or pants that are older than the 'yoof' that are in the pub.
... think that mpg is more important than top speed.
... hear,"Let's go upstairs" and you know that you both mean 'go to sleep'.
Apparently, you stop listening to 'new' music at 36.
Your eyes start to fail between 40-42.
When you open the door for a young lady and hear her say ''oh, what a lovely old man" to her friend. That hurt, that did.
When the women you look at on internet dating remind you of your mum.
Reach 65. Future science will mean I live to 130.
Ha ha, **** off - I pulled a muscle in my neck yawning today!
When the women you look at on internet dating remind you of your mum
Hhaha,..so true
Read the thread about Instagramming and think "life's too short for that bollocks"
Your eyes start to fail between 40-42.
I was about 7 when mine started to go.
- Realise you began holding your hand over one eye in order to read your GTA balance from 8 feet away
- Chew pork scratchings gingerly.
Set your medication out for the next week.. Every week.
You make an involuntary groan when you bend down to pick something up.
Need a nice sit down after the first climb of the ride. Maybe that's more a fitness thing...
When you have to suck your belly in to see if your favourite parts are still there...
You know you are old when you read a thread on vasectomys on stw and you start thinking it might be a good idea!
- Talk about riding road bikes
- Make all the young people leave facebook because of your weird stalking/spying/gauging opinion to justify your divisive politics and lies
- Pretend to be tolerant but......
- Planning meeting tomorrow
- Parking disputes
- ****ing neighbour ****s
- Sabotage trails whilst out taking your dog for a shit
- Potholes
- Boy racers
- It's all electric you can't fix it
- Defensive gnar and rad put downs
- I believe in saving the environment/get them scruffy old cars off the road
- Buy copies of the Daily Mail for each room of your house
- Hate anyone younger than you
- Everyone's a dickhead except you.
You Like to loosen your belt and top trouser button for comfort.
Increasingly, hate all the thing's that make the young happy and like all the thing's that make them sad.
When you hand your spanner to the apprentice and realise it’s actually older than him!
After crashing, instead of leaping to your feet and dusting yourself down muttering “that was close” you lay on the floor for 5 minutes groaning in pain and spend a week wincing every time you bash the affected part.
When your first reaction to somebody doing a comedy fall is “they might be hurt” instead of laughing your head off.
you start getting grey pubes or grey nostril hair.
Sitting down to don socks and then shoes.
And starting on the same foot each time...
When a change of font on a forum is the biggest disaster in your life right now.
When you read all of the replies above ( and those to follow ) and think ..yeah I can relate to most of that ..
You know you are old when you read a thread on vasectomys on stw and you start thinking it might be a good idea
Nope, it's when you think "it's ten years since my snip..."
<i>Your eyes start to fail between 40-42.</i>
Your eyes start to fail after 8 o’clock I the evening.
When trimming nose and ear hair takes longer than shaving.
When you think that the waitress/policeman/doctor is so young that you're favourite belt is probably older than them....and most of your underpants
When you have to stand for 10 minutes after having a poo 'cause your dot hasn't contracted yet
I think we're done here 😅
When you have to stand for 10 minutes after having a poo ’cause your dot hasn’t contracted yet
I was reading with a sigh and nodding to all the comments, until I got to this one..
Yeeeeehhhhhh, I'm still young.. 😉
When your drug of choice is a Beta Blocker......
Euro.
Funniest post ever.
Mines still nice and springy though.
Set your medication out for the next week.. Every week.
Don't know what that's about but it ain't middle-age..!
Sit-down wees
When you declare that mddle age doesn't start until 50
When you find that M&S jeans with stretch are ideal for you needs... *blush*
recognise that sex with your partner is getting less and less frequent but dont really mind that much.
The first thing you think of packing for your next snowboarding break is Gaviscon.
When you start worrying about when bin day is...and have panic attacks over the xmas break when you have to go 3 weeks without the bin being emptied...
When your first reaction to somebody doing a comedy fall is “they might be hurt” instead of laughing your head off
Phew, I'm safe. You can't beat seeing somebody fall over, it dosen't even have to be a comedy fall either!
When you don't have to make excuses for being slow...
When you wake up in the morning with a hangover and all you had the night before was tea.
When you can feel your belly 'jiggling'whilst riding your bike.
you remember when all this was maroon and beige!