[Closed] Really bad names for bikes

Slayer 🙄

Handjob, or most anything by Cove...
Pickenflick (which I own)

The (Santa Cruz) Butcher because I like to mince on trails 8)

SEX one (two/ three)

Gary.

It's only a matter of time before Orange do it.

I REALLY had to think hard about a nukeproof frame, but just couldn't bring myself to have a bike called "mega"

Agree with anything by Cove, imagine being like "I've got an STD"

Kona ,Humuhumu-Nukunuku-Apu'A

Apollo Outrage - quite appropriate name really.

My friend has a Kona King Kikapu, which is a fairly silly name for a bike.

Hooger Booger Blaster.

Spotted recently in Pitlochry.

I just find the Nukeproof name a bit naff....let alone the Mega.

The Cove names are an acquired taste.

Specialized Roubaix

butterworth24 - Member

Agree with anything by Cove, imagine being like "I've got an STD"

I have a Hooker and an STD 😳

I love Hels' approach to Cove naming

[url= https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5234/14328473301_fa5f7de212_b.jp g" target="_blank">https://farm6.staticflickr.com/5234/14328473301_fa5f7de212_b.jp g"/> [/img][/url][url= https://flic.kr/p/nQaaV8 ]IMG_2732[/url] by [url= https://www.flickr.com/people/53860438@N06/ ]Northwindlowlander[/url], on Flickr

I also love that my Boardman hybrid is called a Boardman Hybrid.

You're a sad lot: The Cove names are great and Nukeproof is an awesome name for a company. There is room for a bit of childish humour ya know. Lighten up!! Jeez.

Cube,,,What kind of name is that for a bike brand,,, then Fritz and Stereo 😕

Apollo Outrage - quite appropriate name really.

Not as good as the Apollo Letdown!

Ha! Loving that Librarian 😆

For balance, here's mine outside the Fanny's Rest 😉

[img] [/img]

Had a Diamond Back years ago, a new FS design called the XR8. unfortunately the type face on the frame made it look like KR8, who wants a FS bike called a crate?

I just had a look a coves website and think the company must be run by twelve year olds.
Next year they are bringing out a Couple of new bikes.
"Porksword" & "Dirtbox"

Trek Slash (narf!) and Cannondale Trigger are definitely two that stand out to me.

If you own a Cannondale Trigger, do you call all your riding mates 'Dave'?

"Kona" in Portuguese - Lady's parts.

"Kona Stinky" in Portuguese - not good.

Ok, I had a Cove Stiffee for years but if they bring out a bike called a porksword I'd have to get one just for the name. Just try dropping that in to a conversation in the pub with a bunch of blokes you've just met at say an Enduro event....

Oh yes chaps I ride a porksword!! It'd be like one of those visa adverts 😆

Pivot les. Thread over.

Am I too innocent. Why are Coiler and Pompino juvenile? 😕

As the proud owner of a bright yellow Handjob I think some of you should relax
It's just a bike with a silly name.
There are much bigger problems in the world to get your web ninja juices flowing

web ninja juices

*Files trademark*

dannyh - Member
Trek Slash (narf!) and Cannondale Trigger are definitely two that stand out to me.

If you own a Cannondale Trigger, do you call all your riding mates 'Dave'?

POSTED 1 HOUR AGO #

I have a Trigger. But no mates called Dave. They couldn't face the awesomeness of the gnarwhale...

Despite loving mine, I cringe every time in see my Inbred's name sticker.

You should see some of the names in trials, there's a new brand out called #Hashtagg with the Raijin and then there's the Crewkerz [url= http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Cleep ]Cleep[/url], Rockman Björn, Rockman Gabbro...

You lot critisising the Nukeproof Mega do know it's named after [url= http://www.megavalanche.com/ ]THIS [/url] race/series don't you?

Speeder - Member
You lot critisising the Nukeproof Mega do know it's named after THIS race/series don't you?

Others to include the Tarmac, anything that is just numbers and I'll +1 the teenage marketing department at cove.

Always wanted a Chas Roberts Dogs Bolx, but even I would feel obliged to hide the name from time to time!

Cove have a slightly blemished Gspot on their site right now. Should have titled it an STD.

Can't wait for the Cove Rimmer!

Am I too innocent. Why are Coiler and Pompino juvenile?

Don't do what I did years ago and google "pompino" at work.

Love my Prince Albert!

Nukeproof for me hands down. So what if the mega Is named after a race it's still a shit name. Wouldn't even consider one of their bikes because the name is daft. I don't get (Cy)cotic really either and they have a rubbish logo but the name isn't bad enough to stop me buying their bikes. Then there is YT I mean come on! Young talent!?!?!? Really!!?!? By comparison cove is a good brand name, with fairly childish bike names.

Years ago, I remember dealing with somebody who had a right stroppy fit because I hadn't heard of his bike. It was called a Lincoln Breaker, and not entirely unsurpringly, had broken.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Rose Bikes 2014 lineup:

Granite Chief
Jabba Wood
Root Miller
Count Solo
Dr. Z
Mr. Big
Mr. Ride
Psycho Path
Thrill Hill
The Bruce
The Jester
Soul Fire
The Unchained
Uncle Jimbo
Crystal Stoke
The Duchess
Verdita Green

I love my Granite Chief.... but they need to 'av a word with whoever thinks those up. Some of them are ok I suppose, but they should probably win the award for being the most consistently bad.

Kona Dawg. Whenever people would ask me what it was, I'd end up trying to pronounce Dawg but giving up and calling it a Dog.

[i]Blazin-saddles:[/i]
Had a Diamond Back years ago, a new FS design called the XR8. unfortunately the type face on the frame made it look like KR8, who wants a FS bike called a crate?

As a 'krait' is a very dangerous snake of the Indian subcontinent, 'KR8' could be quite a cool name for a company called Diamond Back. They missed a trick there! (The XR8 actually IS the real DB bike.)

I've never understood why Cube called one of their bikes LTD. Are they saying it's limited in some way, or does it mean something else in Germany?

Always wanted a Chas Roberts Dogs Bolx, but even I would feel obliged to hide the name from time to time!

I have a D.O.G.S.B.O.L.X. When I had it resprayed, the guy refused to apply the decals with that name! Told me it was offensive!

Orange AirO.

I have one - great bike but crap name. I once had some parts stolen from it and the police officer I was giving the details to on the phone thought it was hilarious that my bike was named after a chocolate bar (once I'd convinced them that I had a blue Orange bike).

Scott Purgatory. I know [url= http://cnnsi.com/vault/article/magazine/MAG1136377/index.htm ]why it's called that[/url] but still, it's just a crap name for a bike.

batfink - Member
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Rose Bikes 2014 lineup:

Granite Chief
Jabba Wood
Root Miller
Count Solo
Dr. Z
Mr. Big
Mr. Ride
Psycho Path
Thrill Hill
The Bruce
The Jester
Soul Fire
The Unchained
Uncle Jimbo
Crystal Stoke
The Duchess
Verdita Green

I love my Granite Chief.... but they need to 'av a word with whoever thinks those up. Some of them are ok I suppose, but they should probably win the award for being the most consistently bad.

POSTED 8 HOURS AGO # REPORT-POST

Surely everyone wants to ride "The Duchess"?

Bianchi Camaleonte - I read it a "cameltoe" every time! 😆

Klumpy - the [url= http://schwinncruisers.com/bikes/krates/ ]Schwinn Krate[/url] was very popular in the US.

[img] [/img]

I love Rose Bikes names, surely the result of google translating a catalogue through 4 different languages.

Oops, I ride a 15.5" stiffee, was green, but powder coated purple years ago! Just had to be purple....

Also have a nukeproof mega, no too keen on the name, but does not bother me.

Simone

My Trek A01 Cross bike is called Jeffrey and hes big black and very stiff.

AND! its roughly the same as Keith Bontrager is using here, if its good enough for me its good enough for him...