Rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain, rain. Rain rain rainy rain rain rain.
*breath*
Rain rain rain rain rain rain. Rain rain rain rain rain rain. Rain rain rainy rainy rain rain. Rain rain rain rain rainy rain.
*weeps*
It’s a recognised phenomenon: if you repeat a word enough times it loses all semantic meaning, and you just end up with the form of the words. It’s quite odd. But appealing, if the word in question is ‘rain’ and the semantics are all depressing and cold and wet.
It’s quite amusing though, if the word is ‘giraffe’. Or ‘horse’. Horse horse horse horse horse horse horse horse.
But three words which never, ever (ever) lose their semantic association with joy and delight (or, apparently, intense irritation, pain and anguish*) are these:
Fresh
Goods
Friday.
*Occasionally we do get purple faced, wild eyed, spittle flecked emails from people (you know who you are) telling us (me) that Fresh Goods has become the worst thing ever, and that by putting a pile of random unamusing rubbish at the beginning we’ve (I’ve) somehow ruined the rest of it and STW in general (and the World, and Everything Good and Happy), and that a wide range of people don’t look at the website now because of 100 words at the beginning of one story that goes out on a Friday morning (or early afternoon, if I’m really busy)…
….
….
Well, it’s nice that you care.
But for now, I have the crayons. So please, feel free to ignore the opening paragraph. It’s entirely optional, and its omission will in no way expunge your enjoyment of the looking at of the bicycle stuff… which is, sometimes, pretty cool! Look!
Cannondale Trigger Carbon 1
Lovely, and strangely controversial. Some people love the lefty, and others think it looks weird. I’m firmly in the love camp, personally. And I’m always impressed with Cannodale’s determination to do things its own way – which is why the Trigger also has lots of other techno gubbins to its credit. But it’s certainly pretty, and pretty striking.
1×11 drivetrain, as is the norm these days. And some nicely sculpted carbon dropouts.
The Dyad shock. Clever cable operated gubbins in the shock change the travel to 85mm for going up in Elevate mode, and 140 for railing back down again, at the flick of a handlebar switch.
Guide brakes do the stopping..
There are lots of nice touches. This little polished metal plate is to stop cable rub on the frame from the travel adjust mechanism.
Cannondale own-brand chainset…
WTB carbon rims for a very blingy wheelset.
One of the traditional problems/prejudices against Leftys is the issue of wheel removal. Cannondale have made it simpler using a clever front disk mount – unscrew one bolt, loosen the other and the whole thing pops off. It’s dead easy.
Price: £5,499
From: CSG
Commencal Meta AM v4 Race
Commencals are lovely looking bikes, too. The Meta AM race has 150mm of rear travel and 160mm at the front.
11 speeds of SRAM power…
And SRAM stoppage to boot.
Pikes up front.
…and a Monarch+ RC3 Debonair on the back.
Price: €3,899
From: Commencal
Volano Fluid Direct Drive Trainer
Well, now the weather is proper gopping, thoughts turn to the idea of beasting ourselves indoors instead of getting hideously wet. The Volano may look like you’re running a stack of LPs in your back wheel, but it’s a near-silent trainer, with which you remove your rear wheel and pop the trainer in instead (so you need another cassette). It’s compatible with ANT+ and Bluetooth (sensor not included) and it also works with 130mm, 135mm and 142×12 dropouts! Win!
Price: £349.99
From: Madison
Gore Element Windstopper Shell
Chipps is – uh – I really have no idea what to say at this point.
We like the urban camo pattern loads, and (although it’s hard to see from the pic) there are fluoro details all over the shop – the cuffs specifically. And a hood!
Price: £199.99
Element Windstopper Gloves
Gloves to match the top up there ^^. Windstopper, neon, Basically so, in the right conditions, Chipps’ top half would completely disappear. They also have camo trousers!!
Price: £54.99
Gore Paclite
Stows small, weighs notalot, and is slightly too big for Hannah. She’s not very good at ‘brooding’…
Price: £149.99
Gore Power Trail Windstopper Gloves
Windstopper, padded, unisex and warm – meet the Power Trails.
Here Hannah is attempting to do something with shadow puppets, in a room with diffused lighting. That says much, we feel.
Price: 49.99
Gore Lady Gloves
More windstopper, more warm in a glove sort of shape, for ladies.
Price: £39.99
All from: Gore Apparel
Morvelo Socks
Sort of dispersed WWII battleship camo (at least the non-neon ones). Add some bling to your ankles!
Price: £9.99
From: Morvelo
IceBreaker Zone long sleeve
Available in both boy and girl flavours, the Zone is packed with things like Merino mesh, gussets and side lock seams. This one ^^ is the girls, and…
…This one is the boys. The boys one has a louder yellow collar lining.
Price: £80.00 for each
From: Snow and Rock
Osprey Raptor
Hannah looks kind of exasperated (from the back) in the Osprey Raptor. Lots of nooks and crannies and places to store helmet, organisational pockets and so forth.
Price: £90
From: Osprey
7Mesh gear…
Recon Jacket
Windstopper, loads of freedom of movement and breathability, and lots of great design touches. You can get it in Paprika or…
…it’s also available in black.
Price: £219
Strategy Jacket
More windstopper, rear pockets and what seems to be a more fitted cut than the recon. Although it’s still too big for Hannah.
Price: £200
Recon Shorts
Woo! Prototypes these. Production ones will be a little looser in the keg to allow more room for kneepads, and the snap is more robust. The waist is also a little looser and more comfy. No price as of yet.
AK1 undershorts
These are prototypes, but they’re actually for chaps, even though Hannah is wearing them. The difference between these and the productions ones are a different waistband to stop them from folding over. As prototypes we’ve got no price yet.
All details and stuff from: 7Mesh
Green Oil
Lots of environmentally friendly lubes and cleaners and sponges and things designed to keep your bike in tip top condition and not to knacker the environment (too much). And there’s a sturdy-looking brush, too.
And to strengthen their eco-credentials… elephant poo paper!
Price: Eco-rider kit £24.99, Brush £9.99
All from: Green Oil
Ragley Wiser Bars
I always have mental images of Elmer Fudd whenever I see the name of these. 300g, 760mm wide, 5 degrees of upsweep and available in three flavours of up, 10, 25 or 38mm.
Price: £39.99
From: Ragley
One23 pedals
For a forthcoming trail pedals test, here are the One23s! Promo spindle, 300g of clipless wonderment.
Price: £47.99
From: Moore Large
Orp Horn
No, it’s not a light, it’s a horn of the parpy parpy persuasion. PARP. With a remote control! So you can leave it somewhere discreet and terrify your cat with it too!
Price: £49.99, £14.99 for the remote.
From: Ison Distribution
Fi’z:k Monte K:ium Saddle
MTB saddle from the masters of random punctuation. Made for Enduro, apparently, the Monte is ‘built for racing’ and it combines ‘the dynamics of hard lines and soft edges’. Well, quite. Looks comfy though.
Price: £89.99
From: Extra
NukeProof Sam Hill Horizon Pro pedals
Lovely machined and finished pedals from Nukeproof with input from Mr Hill. 36g lighter than Neutrons, concave for optimal contact for yer Five Tens. Pretty.
Price: £79.99
From: Hotlines
Aaaaaand we’re done. All that remains is to peer into the weather outside and groan. It’s not so much rain as a solid body of water with little slots of air in it. I suspect that I may be swimming home. But at least I get to ride through some pretty substantial puddles – yay!
Anyway, have a great weekend, and we’ll see you on the flip side!
ST out.
Comments (11)
Comments Closed
£5,499 – Yowsers!
Give it 12 months and Paul’s will be knocking them out for £2k.
A little looser in the keg, eh? A Friday beer-related slipup I reckon. Those pedals look ace but until I bend my Superstars, I’m sticking with them.
you’ve got the name of the horn wrong too – it’s Orp not Orr.
I personally love the artistic introduction (bollocks) at the beginning of the feature. Its often more interesting than the bike porn on offer!
HTS has it. I shall be waiting for these to get to Paul’s stock at the end of 2016. Gives me enough time to flog a bit of liver or a kidney to pay for it.
Fixed Orr/Orp; leaving Keg. It tickles me 🙂 New mac with apparently very aggressive spellcheck is my excuse, and I’m sticking with it!
I’m in the queue for the ‘dale from Paul’s as well…
I only read this for the bollocks bit Barney. Keep doing it
I’m a bit put off!!
Have you not got a spotty 40 something ex university looser bloke whoose parents thought he would do really well until he read singletrack (other mbr pro, mtb etc etc), and so believed MTBing to have a source within 15miles of Ramsbottom (a far nicer place than Calderdale) to make the clothes look better?….Please,
p.s. VW transporters are the definition of been ripped off by a large company who have spotted that certain twatts believe their products will take them back to the Arian era and the T1 split screen….
LOOK AT ME AND PART WITH £35+000.00 pounds for a pile of incorrectly marketed shite:-)
LLLOOOOOSERS!
BRMMMM BRMMMM
You alright mate?
Well, that was bizarre.