My Garmin sat nav when I don’t know the exact address.

You always miss a bit of poo when wiping that clings on

barstaff who cant pull a pint, and end up spoiling your pint because of this.
UP NORTH WE LIKE HEAD.

when it takes 10 emails to solve a problem because someone won’t answer the very specific question that you asked and would rather tell you what they think you need to know.

Just answer the damn question, it’s not difficult

And getting a pint of Camden pale ale,for instance ,in a Greene King ipa glass.l!

people in shops who pack slowly, pay slowly and piss about getting themselves together before moving out of the way.

When barstaff put a head on a pint because they think up north they like one.

When pedestrians press the crossing button THEN look to see if owt is coming… 🙄

barstaff who cant pull a pint, and end up spoiling your pint because of this.
UP NORTH WE LIKE HEAD.

When I buy a pint, I expect a pint, not seven-eighths and froth!
“Would you like a Flake in that, love?”
Bugger off I want a pint!
A head is only acceptable if the glass is oversized.

The usually elderly gentleman in front of you at the petrol pump who always pays at the kiosk, always ambles back to his car (the car that is highly polished and even the tyres are clean) – and, before vacating the pump he always must first adjust and or check the following:

1. Rear view mirror
2. Seatbelt
3. Werthers stash or whatever else the flip is in that very interesting console cubby hole/glove compartment
4. Wing mirrors
5. Windscreen washers
6. Till receipt

&c.

Sweet holy shite. It makes me fair gargle with rage*. Does he imagine that some scallywag went and f**** with his wash jets, mirrors and Werthers whilst he was momentarily paying for fuel? ARSE!

*Tut with impatience and slowly shake head whilst blowing cheeks outwards.

1. Rear view mirror
2. Seatbelt
3. Werthers stash or whatever else the flip is in that very interesting console cubby hole/glove compartment
4. Wing mirrors
5. Windscreen washers
6. Till receipt

You forgot 7: Check and answer emails 🙂

Why a ford needs six buttons for cruise control, when VW can do it with two.

WE LIKE HEAD.

I’m not keen on Americanisms but hell yeah 🙂

Related to the petrol station one – when you’re in a queue at the checkouts and the person in front of you is told the price. And only then to they start to wonder where the **** they put their purse, rummaging round in the 74 pockets of their “organiser” handbag, their coat and eventually finding it and then counting out the spare bits of change.

Hand over £10 note and then, 3 seconds after the cashier has typed in “£10.00” and got the correct change displaying on the screen, they triumphantly hold out their hand saying “oh, I’ve got the 23p, does that help?”

No it **** doesn’t! Now you’ve confused the cashier and added an extra minute of delay to the whole transaction which would have been over in 5 seconds if you’d had your contactless card to hand when you should have!

traffic lights on roundabouts late at night when no one is about and you still have to stop

That a local taxi firm has a sticker on the back of their cars which reads ‘ADVANCED BOOKINGS ONLY’

Does this mean that basic bookings are not allowed?

It should be ‘Advance’!!!^GRGRRG$$%^&%*&^**!!

Cinemas who try to sell me a pile of sugary crap with my ticket and then the idiots who munch all the crap insted of watching the film.

That little ticket that Sainsburys give you for discount on their home delivery service, every time you visit.
Won’t somebody think of the trees?

The pilots jacket buttons on a 1:72 scale spitfire

27mph

” For free” Agggh

And having wandered our way back from NW Scotland over 2 days going from town to town I heartily agree with the Garmin satnav thing.

people in shops who pack slowly, pay slowly and piss about getting themselves together before moving out of the way.

Supermarket checkout staff who bowl the easily crushed, bruised or squashed food you’re about to pay them for at you as if it’s some kind of game to see how much food you can destroy in the least time.

someone won’t answer the very specific question that you asked and would rather tell you what they think you need to know how important it is you deal with the thing they’re not telling you about because they’re pissing about telling you how important it is that you deal with it.

Just answer the damn question, it’s not difficult

Mrs_oab’s new Trek, who bang on about ‘right wheel size’, so offer thier 13.5″ frame as 650b not 29er. Only to fit 175mm cranks. 😕

The person in front of me at the pump at a local convenience garage during a busy time who then decides to do the weekly shop at the same time!

ITS A FUEL STATION FFS!!! 👿

People who indicate right and then left at a round about then they are going straight on. And people who don’t indicate at all.

The fact that you are never more than 10 minutes away from that **** james corden advert if your wife watches itv.

Grrrr

People who say “off of” bloody Scott Mills inspired language

^^ spotted that when visiting Beaulieu too 😳

Also a few oddities on some of the ‘original condition’ cars too. Things like chrome wiper arms with black wiper blades etc.

When a person starts a pair of antonym threads on a forum.

Comic sans font.

Other people. Other people when they do things slowly.

and “under orientation”

Restaurants adding ‘discretionary’ 10% service charge to the bill without asking.

people in shops who pack slowly, pay slowly and piss about getting themselves together before moving out of the way.

NEVER come to Holland.

People watch their shopping get scanned and go down the conveyor belt with a detached, bovine indifference, pay and get their equivalent of a green shield stamp, look at their shopping in a pile at the bottom of the conveyor. Have a think about what to do next – paint their toenails? take a walk amongst the tulips? have a dream about cheese? …. then finally consider it might be a good idea to put their shopping in some sort of ………bag.

It is like they have never been to a supermarket before in their entire lives and they have no concept of what they should be doing. Of course, the cashier doesn’t help bag stuff and there is no equivalent in Dutch of the phrase “would you like some assistance with your packing”.

Or it could just be that they are so money-obsessed that they are using 101% of their abilities to ensure the cashier doesn’t scan something twice or overcharge them by €0.01.

The bit on the STW forum page that reads “MAIN THEME”. What does that even mean? Shouldn’t it be “Forum” or even “Sub-forum”?

#dirtydropbargoodness

more like #nichetryingtoohard

That little ticket that Sainsburys give you for discount on their home delivery service, every time you visit.
Won’t somebody think of the trees?

Tip from my boss, when you have a money off voucher take it to the self checkout and scan it but put feed one of those money off home delivery in the slot. The money off one can continue to be used until it goes out of date. In the absence of a home delivery offer apparently old parking tickets can be utilised, in fact I think any bit of paper the right size will work.

Restaurants adding ‘discretionary’ 10% service charge to the bill without asking.

Either get them to take it off, (and leave a cash tip if good service) or pay it and leave no tip. But yes, that annoys me too, just have to remember to check the receipt every time. Pretty much standard in That London though.