Invite him around for dinner, drug his food and when he keels over tie him to a chair, blindfold him, place a small orange in his mouth and turn the heating on full. When he wakes up play a tape of loud Arabic shouting (I’m assuming he doesn’t speak Arabic) and hit him repeatedly in the face. After he’s broken down a bit, hold his head back and place a flannel over his face. Pour water on this until he expires.
Then take the flannel and blindfold off, untie him and slap him a bit until he, hopefully, wakes up. In the unlikely event he fails to see the funny side, remind him about the wheel.