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New g/f and carpet ...
 

[Closed] New g/f and carpet in her toilet, along with white shag pile everywhere

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[#5402126]

So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet,but the toilet has white carpet also and no over spray mat.

Sometimes premature urination may make an appearance , so how to cope /avoid.

Thankfully i have vinyl at home.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:43 pm
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If your guidance system is unreliable you may have to sit.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:44 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:45 pm
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Sounds like a girl who will love it if you go round immediately after a wet ride !


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:46 pm
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At least your new GF likes a good shag

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.pile carpet.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:46 pm
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Sometimes premature urination may make an appearance...
What are you, 7 years old?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:48 pm
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its shoes off on entry,and clean socks

How very English.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:49 pm
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So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet

I'll say it. Phnarr!

Edit: 3 seconds too late *ponders familiarity of phrase*


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:49 pm
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Yup deffo sit down and make sure your little tallywaker is pointing downwards too to avoid peeing thru the gap between the seat and the pan...Or is that just me 😕


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:49 pm
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So its shoes off on entry,and clean socks,then onto the white carpet,but the toilet has white carpet also and no over spray mat.

In all honesty, I'd make hay while the suns shining. But no longer. I couldn't live with that.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:50 pm
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fenred,no it's not just you. 😳


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:50 pm
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Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:53 pm
 IanW
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Clean in the kitchen, dirty in the bedroom?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:56 pm
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Toilet carpets were clearly invented by a woman.

Not so sure, the GF is almost certainly female. But she hates toilet carpets.

I'm thinking they are the work of the sort that collects embroidered badges. Or those little enamel badges that get stuck to walking sticks. Usually male.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:56 pm
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Clean in the kitchen, dirty in the bedroom?

Sloppy eater, dirty...... err


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:57 pm
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thejesmonddingo - Member
fenred,no it's not just you.

I can't believe I fessed up to that on a public forum, glad I'm not unique tho, been worrying about that for 40 years! 😆


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 7:57 pm
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I can't believe I fessed up to that on a public forum, glad I'm not unique tho, been worrying about that for 40 years!

Well I can't say I've done that since I was about 3 and still had plenty of growing to do 😉 (that should make you feel bad about it again :p )


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:02 pm
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Are there knitted toilet roll covers too? I'm trying to build a picture here ... are you dating Hyacinth Bucket?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:04 pm
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I'm no expert, but I reckon she's probably insane...


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:05 pm
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You could wear some really big slippers that would catch any drips.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:09 pm
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Has she got a well kept garden and do her curtains match her carpet?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:10 pm
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Projects girlfriend?

[url= http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2837/9458447163_e557c53976.jp g" target="_blank">http://farm3.staticflickr.com/2837/9458447163_e557c53976.jp g"/> [/img][/url]
[url= http://www.flickr.com/photos/90886684@N03/9458447163/ ]image[/url] by [url= http://www.flickr.com/people/90886684@N03/ ]piemonster[/url], on Flickr


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:14 pm
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Piss in the sink, it's the only way to be safe.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:15 pm
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Has she got a well kept garden and do her curtains match her carpet?

She does have a selection of garden ornaments, which all stare at you when youre in the garden.Very off putting.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:17 pm
 hora
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Your girlfriend was 30 in the 70's?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:18 pm
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Cheers andyl, you must furnish me with your mobile number so I can call you when I'm at a low ebb/times of woe 😉


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:18 pm
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Have a pee outside against the wall before ringing the doorbell. It's the only way to avoid incidents.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:19 pm
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She does have a selection of garden ornaments, which all stare at you when youre in the garden.Very off putting.

[img] [/img]

RUN AWAY!

Anybody who puts carpets in the toilet, bathroom or kitchen is clearly insane.

And if it's white carpet... GOOD GOD. And starey garden ornaments?

FLY, YOU FOOL!


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:21 pm
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I know a person not a million miles from this thread who's GF (at the time) made him go to the pub across the road to have a number two...
😉 you know who you are...


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:24 pm
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Have a pee outside against the wall before ringing the doorbell

Is that a euphamism for something?


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:24 pm
 hora
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What are you doing in the garden?

Her doggy-style??


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:25 pm
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carpet in the khazi == fail.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:29 pm
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[i]Is that a euphemism for something? [/i]

You've no idea how many times I changed that comment in an attempt to avoid just that. Garden, grass, front door, in the street...


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:31 pm
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Stoppit, you're turning me on! 😆


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:33 pm
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New favourite gif.

Poject leave a trail of muddy footprints to the loo, miss. Leave


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:34 pm
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No peeing after sex for you then... (For the benefit of the vast number of 40 yr old virgins on here, it sometimes divides into two different directions)


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:41 pm
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White carpets does suggest she's not into dirty sports!


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:41 pm
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fenred - Member
Cheers andyl, you must furnish me with your mobile number so I can call you when I'm at a low ebb/times of woe

😆

That gif needs a different type of badger at the point he stops and runs away

No peeing after sex for you then... (For the benefit of the vast number of 40 yr old virgins on here, it sometimes divides into two different directions)

Love the scene in Me, Myself and Irene where he goes to the bathroom the next morning 😀


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:42 pm
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Project's new toilet footwear.

[img] https://encrypted-tbn3.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSFLyv5TSoLufbXu7sdlRoyMVHoa1pDKkN_Krt24gKDyWw6EOzi [/img]


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:43 pm
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Love the badger Mrs Toast.


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:43 pm
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khani - Member
I know a person not a million miles from this thread who's GF (at the time) made him go to the pub across the road to have a number two...
you know who you are...

POSTED 23 MINUTES AGO # REPORT-POST

Cheers for that fella! That's the last time I share any 'treat pics'' and tales of debauchery with cosmetically enhanced Chigwell mentalists with you!! 😀 😉


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:53 pm
 sbob
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Whathaveisaidnow - Member

I'm no expert, but I reckon she's probably insane...

Possessing tits is normally the first clue. 😉


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:56 pm
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😆 LOL 😆 I didn't mention the toilet roll tubes...


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 8:57 pm
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[b]ENUFF ALREADY!!![/b] 😯

*puts fingers in ears* lahlahlahlah! #back to therapy I go 😀


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 9:10 pm
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[img] [/img]


 
Posted : 07/08/2013 9:24 pm
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